The The One Show Show

TTOSS live at the London Podcast Festival 2022 Part 2

Mon, 17 Oct 2022 23:01:36 GMT

Joining Jon and Marc for a special live show at the London Podcast Festival are the ace Angela Barnes and the brilliant Laura Lexx!

Recorded a week after the Queen died (when no one was sure what the temperature of the room was) and featuring a lot of audio visual material, this is the show as it was always supposed to be heard: in audio format with all the sight gags rendered redundant. If you find it confusing, well, shoulda bought a ticket. There's always next year.

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TTOSS live at the London Podcast Festival 2022 Part 1

Mon, 17 Oct 2022 04:56:25 GMT

Joining Jon and Marc for a special live show at the London Podcast Festival are the ace Angela Barnes and the brilliant Laura Lexx!

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TTOSS LIVE at the London Podcast Festival - Friday 16th September at 7pm!

Wed, 31 Aug 2022 13:26:10 GMT

Jon and Marc and a special guest return to the London Podcast Festival for a live show at 7pm on Friday 16th September!

Attendance is MANDATORY.

Tickets available here!

https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

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S7E10 - Light Ent Hellraiser, Everyone's Ignoring JJ and Welcome Alexandra Stadium

Wed, 03 Aug 2022 23:02:05 GMT

The multi-brilliant actor, writer and all-round everything good Beth Granville joins Jon and Marc to encourage the One Show to eat an entire packet of fireworks as they sit smoking nearby.

Follow Beth here: @BettyGranville

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival! Get tickets! Come!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

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S7E09 - Daniel Kaluuya Feeds Medicine to Horses, It's Barely TV and Follow Your Chuckledreams

Tue, 02 Aug 2022 23:01:54 GMT

The multi-brilliant actor, writer and all-round everything good Beth Granville joins Jon and Marc to fire one of those ninja hellfire missiles at The One Show.

Follow Beth here and enjoy her Paul Chuckle tweet! @BettyGranville

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

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S7E08 - Harris Someone's Cupboard Anecdote, Greg James' Puzzle Marathon and Ghanian Crab Drawing

Thu, 28 Jul 2022 23:01:27 GMT

Award-winning wonderful sketch men The Awkward Silence - Ralph Jones and Vyvyan Almond - join Jon and Marc to write 'STOP NOW' in dog dirt on the One Show's front door.

You can see Ralph and Vyvyan at the Edinburgh Festival throughout August, where they're performing two shows!

The Awkward Silence's Big Break at the Gilded Balloon Teviot has tickets here!

And you can see them Enter the Vortex at the Underbelly in Bisto Square here!

GO!

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

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S7E07 - William Shatner’s Corpse Flute, Perky Trunks and David James’s Ja Ja Ding Dong

Wed, 27 Jul 2022 23:01:20 GMT

Award-winning wonderful sketch men The Awkward Silence - Ralph Jones and Vyvyan Almond - join Jon and Marc to give the One Show two tickets to the women's football final, which they've coated in a Russian nerve agent.

You can see Ralph and Vyvyan at the Edinburgh Festival throughout August, where they're performing two shows!

The Awkward Silence's Big Break at the Gilded Balloon Teviot has tickets here!

And you can see them Enter the Vortex at the Underbelly in Bisto Square here!

GO!

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

S7E06 - No Time For Stardust, Tic Attack TikTok and Let's Be Neutral About The Hell Weather

Wed, 20 Jul 2022 23:01:30 GMT

The thrilling Jon Long (BBC Radio 4's Carbon Lifeforms) joins Jon and Marc to go swimming with the One Show...but then engineer to return to the shore alone. Fun!

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

S7E05 - Lamprey Sex, Alex Laughs at a Horniman and Adrian Chiles' Alien Chestbuster

Tue, 19 Jul 2022 23:01:27 GMT

The thrilling Jon Long (BBC Radio 4's Carbon Lifeforms) joins Jon and Marc to lock the One Show in the conservatory on the hottest day on record.

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

S7E04 - Cyborg Hybrid Mechanised Matt Allwrights, Jermaine’s Robo-Pudding Theft and A Necklace Clanks

Wed, 13 Jul 2022 23:01:09 GMT

The brilliant Larry and Paul join Jon and Marc to call up The One Show at 2.30am and breathe heavily down the line.

Larry and Paul's YouTube channel is here and they're ACE.

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

S7E03 - Brown Sugar and Onions, The Bournemouth Sea and Natalie Portman's Confusing Dress

Tue, 12 Jul 2022 23:01:41 GMT

The brilliant Larry and Paul join Jon and Marc to approach The One Show on the street and ask if it wants to become a blood donor, before launching an attack on it before it can even reply.

Larry and Paul's YouTube channel is here and they're ACE.

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

S7E02 - Serious Cat Acting, Everyone's Saying Pedigree Chum and Let's Record The Dog Noise

Wed, 06 Jul 2022 23:01:38 GMT

The tremendous Lance Fuller (@lfuller) of the award-winning Cold Case Crime Cuts podcast (@CrimeCutsPod) joins Jon and Marc to tell The One Show that's there's no need to worry, we've got something to make them feel much better, but, of course, it's a syringe full of arsenic.

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

S7E01 - Jermaine Jenas Struggles to Say The Show's Name, One Shoe and Let's All Drive Across A Baby's Nappy

Tue, 05 Jul 2022 23:01:57 GMT

The tremendous Lance Fuller (@lfuller) of the award-winning Cold Case Crime Cuts podcast (@CrimeCutsPod) joins Jon and Marc not to praise The One Show, but to strike it with a spade in a fury, panic and bury it by the side of the M4.

And don't forget, it's TTOSS live on Friday, the 16th September 2022 at the London Podcast Festival!

Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-3/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

S6E11 - Surprise Suicide Squad, Brunioli Toniolio and Alex Tases Gyles Brandreth

Wed, 27 Oct 2021 23:01:15 GMT

For the last time this season, Jon and Marc celebrate the return of Alex Jones, who's back to break a load of sofas.

Some exciting news about 2022 right at the end, if you like this sort of thing and want more of this sort of thing!

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S6E10 - Matt Gloss, Jimmy Carr Ignores An Eagle and 16,000 Bottles of Mammal Water

Wed, 06 Oct 2021 23:01:43 GMT

The joyous writer and performer Alex Sievewright joins Jon and Marc to denounce the One Show as a heretic and apostate. Again.

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S6E09 - COCK26, Alex Scott Speaks An English and All Creatures Great and Shit

Tue, 05 Oct 2021 23:01:12 GMT

The joyous writer and performer Alex Sievewright joins Jon and Marc to help the One Show out of debt by entering it in Squid Game..

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S6E08 - Milk Overheads, Jimmy Carr's Key Cutting Cardboard Box and A Toilet Is Rude About Jamie Oliver

Tue, 28 Sep 2021 23:01:47 GMT

The delightful Radio 4 comedian Jon Lord joins Jon and Marc to write offensive statements about The One Show on the window of a North London public convenience.

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S6E07 - The New Worst TV Interview Of All Time, Twiggy Learns Nothing and A Woman Defies Science Outside Poundland

Mon, 27 Sep 2021 23:32:27 GMT

The delightful Radio 4 comedian Jon Lord joins Jon and Marc to take the One Show out for ice-cream, before driving it to an orphanage a long way from home.

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S6E06 - Live at the London Podcast Festival 2021 Part 2

Thu, 16 Sep 2021 23:01:51 GMT

The non-ghost behind the Battersea Poltergeist podcast and West End play 2:22, Danny Robins joins Jon and Marc to kick off the London Podcast Festival 2021 in front of a lovely crowd of TTOSSers!

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S6E05 - Live at the London Podcast Festival 2021 Part 1

Wed, 15 Sep 2021 23:01:00 GMT

The non-ghost behind the Battersea Poltergeist podcast and West End play 2:22, Danny Robins joins Jon and Marc to kick off the London Podcast Festival 2021 in front of a lovely crowd of TTOSSers!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

S6E04 - Petula Clark's Dean Martin Nonecdote, Robots Can't Make Caravans and No Questions For Alesha

Tue, 31 Aug 2021 23:01:44 GMT

Comedy legend and double Oscar nominee Peter Baynham joins Jon and Marc to cut up the One Show to see what makes it tick, and hopefully kill it in the process.

This Thursday, TTOSS is live at the London Podcast Festival with Danny Robins, the man (not ghost) behind the excellent Battersea Poltergeist podcast and the West End hit 2:22 A Ghost Story. Tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-2/

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S6E03 - Matt Damon's On The Hamster Wheel, A Bike Hangs Itself and A Static Apartment

Mon, 30 Aug 2021 23:01:32 GMT

Double Oscar nominee and comedy legend Peter Baynham joins Jon and Marc from LA, to witness the One Show for the first time and instantly regret his decision.

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S6 E02 - Gethin's Reminiscence Machine, Richard E Grant Tries A Pizza and Jami Kandel's Zoom

Mon, 23 Aug 2021 23:01:30 GMT

The wonderful Paul Litchfield (The Trap, A Wheezing Groaning Sound podcast) joins Jon and Marc to rise up against the undemocratically-elected The One Show.

We're doing a TTOSS live show at the London Podcast Festival on Thursday, 2nd September 2021 at King's Place in London. Starts at 7pm - tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show-2/

And if you fancy staying on after, you can catch Paul in the excellent A Wheezing Groaning Sound live podcast at the same venue! Starts at 9.30pm - tickets here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/words/a-wheezing-groaning-sound/

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S6 E01 - Pufflings Aren't Extinct, My Good Friend Humphrey Bogart's Wife and Ice Cream Gets In Your Blood

Sun, 22 Aug 2021 23:01:31 GMT

The wonderful Paul Litchfield (The Trap, A Wheezing Groaning Sound podcast) joins Jon and Marc to attempt to gain herd immunity by watching the sickness that is The One Show.

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Christmas Special (Pt 2): Beverley Knight Entices A Family Outside, Nonecdotes and Christmas Is Coming and So Is A Sheep

Thu, 24 Dec 2020 00:01:00 GMT

HAPPY CHRISTMAS! The utterly great writer. comedian and wonder Emma Kennedy joins Jon and Marc to serve The One Show up a delicious Christmas dinner of relentless criticism. And sprouts.

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Christmas Special (Pt 1): David Walliams' Nazi Gorilla, Rain On Dark, Dark Tarmac and Ronan Keating's Artificial Piano

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 00:32:36 GMT

HAPPY CHRISTMAS! The utterly great writer. comedian and wonder Emma Kennedy joins Jon and Marc to visit The One Show at Christmas, in the hope the police will prosecute The One Show for breaching Tier 4 requirements.

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Episode 5.28 - Regrets of A Centenarian, Nicolas Wintoning and Alex's Non Prank Call

Wed, 15 Jul 2020 23:01:00 GMT

The utterly great journalist and Chart Music podcaster Taylor Parkes joins Jon and Marc to see the One Show off on a well deserved cruise post-lockdown. On the Marie Celeste.

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Episode 5.27 - You Can #Can't Complain, Yesterday's Pulp and Patronising Posh Pasta

Tue, 14 Jul 2020 23:01:00 GMT

The utterly great journalist and Chart Music podcaster Taylor Parkes joins Jon and Marc for the final two-part autopsy on the rotting corpse of The One Show, which has been found desecrated round the back of a forecourt in central London. Hooray!

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Episode 5.26 - Sue Barker’s Tudor Pub, Brian May’s Bum and Let's Review Grease

Thu, 02 Jul 2020 23:01:00 GMT

The superb comedy writer Charlie George (Charlie Brooker's Anti-Viral Wipe and Cunk & Other Humans) joins Jon and Marc to rat out the One Show to the FBI for crimes against making watchable telly.

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Episode 5.25 - Esther's Dolly Men, Black Eyed Penises and Hot Aspect Ratio Chat

Wed, 01 Jul 2020 23:01:00 GMT

The superb comedy writer Charlie George (Charlie Brooker's Anti-Viral Wipe and (Philomena) Cunk & Other Humans) joins Jon and Marc to come not to praise The One Show, but to bury it.

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Episode 5.24 - The Puppysprayer, Hold Me Like A Prawn and Save The One Show One

Wed, 17 Jun 2020 23:01:00 GMT

The brilliant Tilly Steele (who is also the host of the excellent podcast Bitchin' along with being a top actor in Dr Who and Victoria) joins Jon and Marc to pitch a new strand for The One Show. It's called Please End The One Show.

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Episode 5.23 - Edward Colston Meets The Kids, Amol Nitrate and Rosamund Pike's Dungeon

Tue, 16 Jun 2020 23:01:37 GMT

The brilliant Tilly Steele (who is also the host of the excellent podcast Bitchin' along with being a top actor in Dr Who and Victoria) joins Jon and Marc to defend The One Show by getting drunk and fighting with the police.

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Episode 5.22 - Tree Pigs, Maureen Lipman Mouths The F Word and Packham's Left Hanging

Tue, 09 Jun 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Upstart Crow's wonderful Helen Monks (who is also the host of the excellent podcast Bitchin') joins Jon and Marc to drag the One Show to rehab and get it to tearfully admit it has a problem (making good television).

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Episode 5.21 - 1000 Dead Rats, Alan Davies' Old Age Crisis and A Bee's Lunch

Mon, 08 Jun 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Upstart Crow's wonderful Helen Monks (who is also the host of the excellent podcast Bitchin') joins Jon and Marc to go on a socially distanced walk with The One Show. Along Beachy Head.

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Episode 5.20 - Old Wedding Cake, Vesta Vestments and Bonnie Tyler's Bad Rehearsal

Thu, 28 May 2020 20:15:03 GMT

Smersh Pod's supremo John Rain joins Jon and Marc to lead the One Show into a garden to meet six other people (all murderers who've escaped from Broadmoor.)

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that isn't as good as it sounds on the packet. Enjoy!

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Episode 5.19 - Bonnie Tyler's Lair, My Neighbours Are Mugs and An Actual Lioness

Tue, 26 May 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Smersh Pod's supremo John Rain joins Jon and Marc to convince The One Show that Dominic Cummings would make a popular co-host this week.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that isn't as good as it sounds on the packet. Enjoy!

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Episode 5.18 - Michael Ball's Whoopsadaisies, Pony Hypnosis and Greyfriars Bobby Syndrome

Fri, 15 May 2020 18:00:00 GMT

Talksport, BBC London and Virgin Radio newsreader Jenny Barsby joins Jon and Marc to take the One Show for some exercise in the car before just gunning it off a cliff.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that Marc simply cannot make work. Enjoy!

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Episode 5.17 - A Dog's Waiting Room, Jamie Cullum's Cables and Thank You Big Corona!

Thu, 14 May 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Talksport, BBC London and Virgin Radio newsreader Jenny Barsby joins Jon and Marc to ask the One Show to wear a scarf round its face before silently leading it to the edge of a gorge.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that Marc simply cannot make work. Enjoy!

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Episode 5.16 - Pudsey's Furloughed, Blackadder 2020 and Sam Smith In They House

Wed, 29 Apr 2020 23:01:33 GMT

Alasdair Beckett-King - stand-up comedian, animator and ginger wizard - joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to take a look at both The One Show and it's strangely familiar-feeling big brother, the very One-Show-esque BBC Big Night In. Warning: this episode contains some socialist views from one of the contributors. Don't listen if you're subsequently going to email about it, there's enough already going on in the world.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no-one fully understands, even four weeks after we started using it.

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Episode 5.15 - Gervais' Eight Bedrooms, Packham's Illegal Woodbathe & Thank Thank You You

Tue, 28 Apr 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Alasdair Beckett-King - stand-up comedian, animator and ginger wizard - joins Jon and Marc to earnestly inform the One Show it'll give a million pounds to Children in Need if the One Show agrees to go into exile for the next twenty years.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no-one fully understands, even four weeks after we started using it.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 5.14 - THIS IS LINCOLNSHIRE!, Allwright’s Scam Garage & Chairman Mao(ry Berry)

Thu, 23 Apr 2020 23:01:02 GMT

Radio producer and delight Con Mendez joins Jon (writer, comedian and Radio 4 star) and Marc (human rights lawyer, model and Mrs George Clooney) to lock the One Show out of its house during it's hour of government-sanctioned exercise, and call the police the moment 61 minutes have passed.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no-one fully understands, even four weeks after we started using it.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 5.13 - Rita Ora, Vera Ora, Kia Ora and Watchdog Will Not Die

Wed, 22 Apr 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Radio producer and delight Con Mendez joins Jon (writer, comedian and Radio 4 star) and Marc to tell the police The One Show is operating a lockdown scam, by pretending to be an actual TV show.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no-one fully understands, even four weeks after we started using it.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

TTOSS minisode: One Show survivor MEL GIEDROYC tells all!

Tue, 14 Apr 2020 23:01:00 GMT

In the second of our specials where recent One Show guests testify as to their treatment in front of our investigating committee, Jon catches up with the lovely Mel Giedroyc to hear her statement.

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Episode 5.11 - A Heartfelt Farewell to Matt Baker Part 2: Adebanji's Painting and Alex Gets Wine Emotional

Wed, 08 Apr 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Writer, comedian and Radio 4 star Natt Tapley joins Jon (writer, comedian and Radio 4 star) and Marc (a man) to inform the police that The One Show has been seen having a picnic in Brockwell Park and has ruined it for everyone else.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no one fully understands.

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Episode 5.10 - A Heartfelt Farewell to Matt Baker Part 1: Slime Moulds and Matt In A Box

Tue, 07 Apr 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Writer, comedian and Radio 4 star Natt Tapley joins Jon (writer, comedian and Radio 4 star) and Marc (a man) to jog past the One Show and suddenly go off furiously about how the One Show breathed on us. IT'S NOT A CRIME TO JOG, THE ONE SHOW, YOU NAZI!

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no one fully understands.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

TTOSS minisode: One Show survivor Ed Balls tells all!

Sat, 04 Apr 2020 13:02:59 GMT

Jon recently caught up with Ed Balls to find out what it's like to actually be on The One Show, instead of just moaning about it behind its back.

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Episode 5.08 - Badger Fritzl, A Michael Winner Joint and Dom Joly, Son Of God

Wed, 01 Apr 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Writer, journalist and the host of the brilliant Box of Delights podcast Julia Raeside joins Jon and Marc to put the One Show on trial and demand the death penalty, even though it's only stolen some bread to feed its family, like the bloke from Les Miserables.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no one fully understands.

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Episode 5.07 - Noseybonk Sexting, Isolated Pouffes and Mel Giedroyc's Nook

Tue, 31 Mar 2020 23:01:00 GMT

Writer, journalist and the host of the brilliant Box of Delights podcast Julia Raeside joins Jon and Marc to ask the One Show if one of the symptoms of being The One Show is being shit.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no one fully understands.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 5.06 - Futuristic Snood, Open Lotus Red Arrows and Raymond Du Geez

Fri, 27 Mar 2020 00:01:00 GMT

Writer, comedian and all round ace Beth Granville joins Jon and Marc to inform the Tesco security man that the One Show has just helped itself to three packs of butter, when it's only allowed two.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no one fully understands. Hence while parts of it sound like they were recorded in a woollen sock at the bottom of a muddy canal.

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Episode 5.05 - A Murdered Pensioner's House, Chris Ramsey's Big Sigh and Bob The Dog

Thu, 26 Mar 2020 00:27:40 GMT

Writer, comedian and all round ace Beth Granville joins Jon and Marc to inform the Tesco security man that the One Show has just helped itself to three packs of butter, when it's only allowed two.

This episode was recorded with everyone dotted across the country using technology that no one fully understands, so don't worry if Marc sounds like a robot and there's some weird delays between jokes and punchlines. IT'S THE NEW NORMAL, INNIT?

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Episode 5.04 - Coronavirass, The Aswad Movement and Meet A Welsh Texan

Wed, 18 Mar 2020 00:01:00 GMT

Wonderful man, stand-up and panellist on the excellent Do The Right Thing podcast Michael Legge joins Jon and Marc to isolate the One Show down a well.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 5.03 - Good Evening Beavers, Car Park Tough and It's Not Scientific

Tue, 17 Mar 2020 00:20:45 GMT

Wonderful man, stand-up and panellist on the excellent Do The Right Thing podcast Michael Legge joins Jon and Marc to welcome the Coronavirus pandemic to the One Show's sofa.

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Episode 5.02 - 100 Sunglasses, Tell Me I'm Fat Matt and Some Wives

Wed, 11 Mar 2020 00:01:00 GMT

Beloved Football Rambler and Wrestle Me-niac Pete Donaldson joins Jon and Marc to tell the One Show it needs to self-isolate - not because of Coronavirus, but because it's terrible.

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Episode 5.01 - Matt Baker's Obscene Phonecall, Boring Treasure and Show Me Your Papers!

Tue, 10 Mar 2020 00:01:00 GMT

In the first TTOSS of 2020, the beloved Football Rambler and Wrestle Me-niac Pete Donaldson joins Jon and Marc to develop a vaccine for Coronavirus and inject the One Show with it - only to reveal it's just a syringe full of Fanta. Ha ha!

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SERIES 5 - we're back on Tuesday 10th March TTOSSers!

Wed, 26 Feb 2020 00:01:00 GMT

We'll be back to send Matt Baker off - Series 5 kicks off on Tuesday 10th March. Like, subscribe, tell your friends!

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Episode 4.28 - Biggins Is Behind You, Lenny Henry's Baps and Let's Kill A Nazi With A Longbow

Fri, 20 Dec 2019 00:01:35 GMT

In the last TTOSS of 2019, wunderbar Julia Raeside joins Jon and Marc to wait for the clock to strike midnight, cross the threshold of The One Show's house, and put our best foot forward...and through any TVs that are showing The One Show.

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Episode 4.27 - Only Fools and Arses, Daddy Bear Nigel Havers and Amol Rajan's Fake Snow

Thu, 19 Dec 2019 00:01:42 GMT

The beloved writer and host of the Box of Delights podcast Julia Raeside joins Jon and Marc to stuff the One Show's Christmas stocking full of the coal of serious criticism and a tangerine of intense loathing. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.26 - Gyles Brandreth's Cat, Beasts and Do You Smell Nice For The Ladies and The Gentlemen

Wed, 11 Dec 2019 00:01:00 GMT

The excellent BBC comedy producer Laura Grimshaw joins Jon and Marc to spread the rumour round the maximum security prison that The One Show is a snitch.

It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.25 - Fare Thee Well Matthew James Baker (2011-2019)

Tue, 10 Dec 2019 00:01:00 GMT

The excellent BBC comedy producer Laura Grimshaw joins Jon and Marc in the week that television changed forever and Matt Baker clearly attempted to ruin this podcast by resigning.

It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.24 - John Barrowman's Christmas Goatse, Human Books and FOREIGNER?

Wed, 04 Dec 2019 00:01:50 GMT

Actor and writer Alex Sievewright joins Jon and Marc to falsely accuse the One Show of scratching our car, in the full knowledge that we spent fifteen minutes this morning doing it ourselves.

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Episode 4.23 - Rod Stewart's Alligator Feet, Rural Swearwords and Oh God It's Andy Murray

Tue, 03 Dec 2019 00:01:00 GMT

We're back from holiday and general arsing about to bring you the remains of Series 4 - and good news! The One Show is still as unsettling as ever!

Actor and writer Alex Sievewright joins Jon and Marc to tell The One Show it's been awarded a medal at a ceremony taking place in a remote hotel in Aberdeen, only for it to arrive at the remote hotel in Aberdeen to find no one knows anything about any medal ceremony.

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Episode 4.22 - Club Tropicana Drinks Have Run Out, “Oscar’s Mouthing”, and Cake is at Stake.

Wed, 16 Oct 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Ginger stand-up mystical wizard-alike Alasdair Beckett-King and writer / producer / boss-eyed clown Cornelius Mendez join Jon to tell the One Show it’s a fancy dress party when it isn’t, only for everyone to laugh when it turns up dressed as a ‘Sexy Halloween Nurse’. It can only be … The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.21 - Fly #MeToo The Moon, Tiger vs. Squirrel and There Is Almost A Penis.

Tue, 15 Oct 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Award-winning wizard-alike stand up Alasdair Beckett-King and producer, writer and unpaid TTOSS Intern Cornelius Mendez join Jon to push the One Show off the swings in the park. It can only be… The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.20 - Gareth Southgate The Bee, Unfrozen Mods and BACK OF THE HEAD, MA GOD!

Thu, 10 Oct 2019 02:00:34 GMT

Smersh Pod's evil genius John Rain and the nation's sweetheart Julia Raeside of Box of Delights and The Curse of Strictly join Jon to tell the One Show that it's just the local doctor come to take some blood, before giving it a lethal dose of morphine and crudely changing its will.

It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.19 - Amanda Holden's Accidental Music, The GruffaNO and Romesh Has A Mare

Wed, 09 Oct 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Dashing Smersh Pod man John Rain and even more dashing Julia Raeside of Box of Delights and The Curse of Strictly join Jon to tell the One Show it can go on the bus before them, and then suddenly start shouting at it for "pushing in, like a twat."

It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.18 - Broccoli Who, Show Us Your Instrument and At Number 1, It's Son Of A Paedo,

Wed, 02 Oct 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The delightful Lucy Pinder and smashing Joel Morris join Jon to carefully guide The One Show down an abandoned lift shaft. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.17 - Sean Bean HATES His Interview, Joe Pesky and Matt Baker 007

Tue, 01 Oct 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Beloved comedy writer Joel Morris (also on the Rule of Three pod) and the adored actress and model Lucy Pinder (also on the Smashing Sundays pod) join the much less beloved Jon (who is on this pod) to ask The One Show if it can see the dolphin, and when it gets to the ship's edge, smashes it over the head with a wrench.

It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.16 - Flick Off A Crab's Eye, Surprise! It's A Crap Surprise and PURE CLUNES

Thu, 26 Sep 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The amazing Beth Granville and the dashing Tom Price join Jon to hurl an egg at The One Show as it cowers in the back of a police van on the way to its trial for crimes against entertainment.

It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.15 - A Crab Has Sex With A Sponge, McFly McReturn and Matt Nails A Pun

Wed, 25 Sep 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The mighty actors and radio dudes Tom Price and Beth Granville join Jon to slip a load of laxatives into The One Show's tea just before it gets on a trampoline.

It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.14 - Angelica Deliveroo, Matt Lands A Joke and Your Smoke Alarm Will Kill Your Kids

Fri, 20 Sep 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The beloved Jake Yapp joins Jon and Marc to tell The One Show it's been nominated for the Mercury Music Prize, and then watch it from the hotel bar opposite as it fruitlessly attempts to gain entry to the awards while wearing its best suit, the idiot. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.13 - Angelica Bell's Ring, A Giant European and Dame Molly Saturday

Thu, 19 Sep 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The beloved Jake Yapp joins Jon and Marc to tamper with the One Show's brakes at the top of the icy hill marked 'TV Criticism'. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.12 - Live at the London Podcast Festival Part 2

Fri, 13 Sep 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The brilliant Fi Glover joins Jon, Marc and a sold-out audience for The The One Show Show the way it was never intended to be - live. Again.

Recorded at the London Podcast Festival on Friday, 6th September 2019. And now you can hear it preserved for posterity (if you were there) or for free, as usual (if you weren't.)

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Episode 4.11 - Live at the London Podcast Festival Part 1

Thu, 12 Sep 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The brilliant Fi Glover joins Jon, Marc and a sold-out audience for The The One Show Show the way it was never intended to be - live.

Recorded at the London Podcast Festival on Friday, 6th September 2019. And now you can hear it preserved for posterity (if you were there) or for free, as usual (if you weren't.)

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Episode 4.10 - Beach Burglers, Horny/Scared and Obscene Phone Call: The Song

Wed, 04 Sep 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Julia Raeside of the Guardian and the superb new telly podcast BOX OF DELIGHTS joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to dress the One Show as a cat and then shove it down a well.

The The One Show Show is coming LIVE to the London Podcast Festival this September! On Friday 6th September at 7pm, we'll be bringing your favourite One Show related podcast with special guest FI GLOVER! "WHAT'S IT LIKE?" It's SOLD OUT but maybe there'll be some extra tickets made available - I don't know how it works but occasionally they release more. Just spirit them out of thin air, or make all the chairs 3 inches smaller, or something. Anyway, you can try here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show/

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Episode 4.09 - Everything's Gone Too Sexy, Handbagging and Excessive Brotherly Love

Tue, 03 Sep 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Julia Raeside of the Guardian and the superb new telly podcast BOX OF DELIGHTS joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to tie the One Show's shoelaces together while it sleeps and then set off all the fire alarms.

The The One Show Show is coming LIVE to the London Podcast Festival this September! On Friday 6th September at 7pm, we'll be bringing your favourite One Show related podcast with special guest FI GLOVER! "WHAT'S IT LIKE?" It's SOLD OUT but maybe there'll be some extra tickets made available - I don't know how it works. This might just be a humblebrag. Anyway, you can try here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show/

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Episode 4.08 - Drug Rats, The Motown SS and Simon Le Bon Was My Childhood Friend

Wed, 28 Aug 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The excellent writer and creator of the Atheist Bus Campaign Ariane Sherine joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to ask the One Show whether it's starting, because we're asking.

The The One Show Show is coming LIVE to the London Podcast Festival this September! On Friday 6th September at 7pm, we'll be bringing your favourite One Show related podcast (yes, it's the only one) with special guest FI GLOVER! "WHAT'S IT LIKE?" Get a ticket and you'll find out - only 10 remaining! Available here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show/

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Episode 4.07 - Mechanical Children's Finger Extenders, Rabbis Fighting and Matt likes mackerel

Tue, 27 Aug 2019 02:00:00 GMT

We're back (sorry, we took a bit of time out when The One Show wasn't on, and it was so nice not to have to watch The One Show, we didn't come back even when it restarted.) The excellent writer and creator of the Atheist Bus Campaign Ariane Sherine joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to bundle the One Show into our car and then demand a ransom, even though we killed it an hour ago.

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No Rain Stops Play: Wimbledon shuts down The One Show

Tue, 09 Jul 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Right, Wimbledon's on so The One Show's buggered off. They've finally found a way to shut us up. Except they haven't, because (a) they'll be back. Mark my words, they'll be back, and (b) we're presenting TTOSS: LIVE at the London Podcast Festival in September! Tickets and info available here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/the-the-one-show-show/

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Episode 4.06 - Matt Baker AF, Moonpeople and The Pegfield Lulu

Wed, 03 Jul 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The astonishingly great comedian, writer and actor Beth Granville joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to accuse the One Show of murder for a laugh.

The The One Show Show is coming LIVE to the London Podcast Festival this September! On Friday 6th September at 7pm, we'll be bringing your favourite One Show related podcast (yes, it's the only one) to your eyes and ears and mouths and chests. "WHAT'S IT LIKE?" Get a ticket and you'll find out! Available here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/page/2/

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Episode 4.05 - They've Cloned Carol Vorderman, Matt does Live Comedy and The Moon's Birthday

Tue, 02 Jul 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The astonishingly great comedian, writer and actor Beth Granville joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to grab The One Show by the scruff of it neck and throw into the criticism canal. Bring your own rocks.

The The One Show Show is coming LIVE to the London Podcast Festival this September! On Friday 6th September at 7pm, we'll be bringing your favourite One Show related podcast (yes, it's the only one) to your eyes and ears and mouths and chests. "WHAT'S IT LIKE?" Get a ticket and you'll find out! Available here: https://www.kingsplace.co.uk/whats-on/page/2/

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Episode 4.04 - Don't Tell Richard Curtis Your Idea, Madonna's Gone Difficult and Um Err Like

Wed, 26 Jun 2019 02:00:00 GMT

TTOSS is back to wrestle The One Show to the floor (critical arena) and stuff dirt (criticism) into its mouth until it chokes (improves its output) or dies (dies). On today's show: Richard Curtis nabs someone's idea for a film, a massive bag of crisps, we spy on British people going to bed, stop saying 'ummmm', Madonna's being difficult, and Mustard make their long-awaited festival appearance, again, because it makes us laugh when we hear it. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.03 - Michael Ball's Broken Heart, Knitted Budgies and Mustard: Live At Last!

Tue, 25 Jun 2019 02:00:00 GMT

TTOSS is back to lay a critical egg in The One Show and then burst out of its chest on a space ship. On today's show. Jon and Marc are joined by the tremendous actor and all round dude Samantha Baines as Jason Donovan disses Michael Ball, someone's knitted their own budgies, far too many baby hats, Sheridan Smith has her hand held hostage, an ordinary 16 year old schoolgirl, and Mustard make their long awaited festival appearance. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.02 - Anneka Rice's Imaginary Agent, I Need My Miniature Cheeses and Hovis Science

Wed, 19 Jun 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Like a bat out of hell, TTOSS returns to fly into The One Show's face, get caught up in its hair and then bite it, requiring The One Show to have a painful tetanus shot. On today's show. Jon and Marc are joined by BBC Radio legend Phil Williams as Anneka Rice is her own imaginary agent, a housing estate is built on a chemical dump, Henry Blofeld is told to shuddup, some model trains are smashed, a woman sacrifices the planet for some mini-cheeses and the most confusing Hovis-based science experiment ever. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4.01 - A Nazi Walking Stick, Blowers Covers Stormzy and Lovely Toxic Houses

Tue, 18 Jun 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The BBC Radio 5 Live broadcasting legend Phil Williams joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to adopt The One Show but then return it to the orphanage, saying it's not right. On today's show: a Nazi walking stick is uncovered, PG Wodehouse gets updated for 2019, Henry Blofeld reading out Stormzy lyrics doesn't go viral, a housing estate is built on a chemical dump and Lee Mack has only one setting; ON. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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TTOSS returns! Back in your ears Tuesday 18th June 2019!

Wed, 12 Jun 2019 02:00:00 GMT

We're back for arbitrarily numbered Series 4! All new episodes of the old format about the teatime show you don't watch and never will. Starting Tuesday 18th June 2019.

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Episode 3.23 - George Clooney Listens To My Stepdad's Guffs, Tortoise Prices and It's Not Belaboured

Wed, 29 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Writer performer and man Alex Sievewright joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to wrestle The One Show but suddenly shoot and go for the eyes. On today's show: George Clooney listens to a stepdad's guffs, a cat's name is ridiculed by an A-lister, spoiler alert: there's a poor VT on the way, a Spanish woman gets some racist music, we find out how much a tortoise costs, a granny writes on a wall, Angelica Bell calls it 'The One Sow' and IT'S NOT BELABOURED. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.22 - A Teacher Shouts Bum Al Qaeda, Kestrels Eat Queen Victoria and Matt Loves Little Mix

Tue, 28 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Writer performer and man Alex Sievewright joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to write a tell-all expose of the One Show's disgusting personal life. On today's show: JLS isn't mentioned, Rochelle off the Saturday's plagiarises a quiz show, a teacher shouts 'bum Al Qaeda', George Clooney mocks the audience, Matt loves Little Mix, and a Lisa Stansfield/Gabrielle confusion. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.21 - My Neighbour is a Plane, Hahaha Cat Illness and An Unsuitable Radio 1 Diary

Wed, 22 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Host of the phenomenal CRIME CLUB podcast Jack Beaumont joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to phone the One Show in the middle of the night 783 times. On today's show: ha ha cat illnesses, a weak texter, a plane gets far too close, why rabbits die, a woman gets banned from complaining, AdventureCat and a woman who's broken a centuries old coded diary or whatever. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.20 - The King of Bowcat, Medicinal Bifters and Tell Me What A Dog Eats

Tue, 21 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Host of the phenomenal CRIME CLUB podcast Jack Beaumont joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to order 600 unwanted pizzas to the One Show's house. On today's show: an old lady reads a lesbian diary, The One Show refuses to discuss mental health, Jack reveals he lives in a cupboard, medicinal bifters, what do dogs eat, the worst texter EVER, and bowcatting. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.19 - Angelica Bell Explains The Universe, Shoe Factory Blue Plaque and the United Kringdom

Wed, 15 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The superb Radio X presenter and all-round ace Sunta Templeton (who's on Twitter @SuntaTempleton) joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to kiss The One Show on the lips and then send the CCTV to its wife. Angelica Bell explains the mysteries of the universe, Matt Baker believes in aliens, the Chinese army take over The One Show, blue plaques for nothing, a lady says 'United Kringdom', the England Lionesses are patronised, no one can remember the name of the man from Modern Family and the question 'What was that like?' is overused, again. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.18 - Joe Pasquale's Hilarious Genitals, Dogging UFOs and Bonnie Tyler: The Joke

Tue, 14 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The superb Radio X presenter and all-round ace Sunta Templeton (who's on Twitter @SuntaTempleton) joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to paint The One Show into a corner and then set the house on fire. This week: Joe Pasquale can't stop saying 'winkle', Rav Wilding gets his nob out to prevent terminal illness, Jon's been reading the works of Jimmy Savile. a "joke" about Bonnie Tyler, let's meet Seal's best friend and an encounter with a UFO that might be covering up something else. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.17 - Someone Swears At Matt Baker, Threesomeianus and Funny Mummy Kisschase

Wed, 08 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Julia Raeside, TV critic and host of ace podcast Always There joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to phone up The One Show when it appears on Going Live to tell it what we think of it. This week: someone quietly swears at Matt Baker on-air, Angelica Bell asks the same question twice, the bloody rickshaw's back, post-natal depression comedy, delicious salmon and a woman is furious with McDonalds. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.16 - Worst Line of Duty Ever, Michelle Gayle Hates Magic and Matt Baker's Legwarmers

Tue, 07 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Julia Raeside, TV critic and host of ace podcast Always There joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to ask The One Show for a light, and then steal its wallet. This episode contains Michelle Gayle hating magic, Matt Baker in legwarmers, Angelica Bell being hobbled by Alex Jones, pop star mothers, the question "And what was that like?", the non-kids of Fame and a Line of Duty idea that must have looked good on paper. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.15 - Imagine A 22 Foot Wooden Baby, Bursting Cathedrals and Major Gynaecologists

Wed, 01 May 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The superb Magic DJ Tom Price and BAFTA-nominated comedy scribe Joel Morris join Jon Holmes to secretly record The One Show in the toilet and then post the tape to the girl it fancies. Includes a giant mechanical wooden baby. What more do you need to know? It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.14 - Jason Isaac's Octopus, A Giant Baby and Dalai Lama 2: Electric Boogaloo

Tue, 30 Apr 2019 09:45:23 GMT

The brilliant comedy writer Joel Morris and comedian and Magic DJ Tom Price join Jon Holmes to borrow The One Show's phone and then download extreme pornography on it and then informing the police. Jason Isaac's octopus, a giant baby, non-existent dangerous bikers, a joke about eggs is repeated, secret bunkers and the reincarnation of the Dalai Lama. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.13 - Easter Holiday No-Show Spectacular!

Wed, 24 Apr 2019 02:00:00 GMT

There's literally no shows this week as it's Easter and everyone's in a diabetic coma. On the plus side - you'll finish this week's output within a minute. Happy Easter (for the day before yesterday!)

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Episode 3.12 - Badger Ham, Idris Elba's Deprivation Rollerskates and Earlobe Shaming

Wed, 17 Apr 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Comedy writer extraordinaire Jason Hazeley and Jon's former BBC 6 Music colleague David Whitehead join Jon Holmes to tell The One Show it's not angry with it, just disappointed. A countrywide vegan dog food survey, Idris Elba's home is mocked, a furious victim of keyless crime, alumni of the Eleven O'Clock Show and Polish badger ham, It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.11 - Zammo's Key Cubicle, Matt Baker Loves Dog Food and Crying Boy Fires

Tue, 16 Apr 2019 02:00:00 GMT

Comedy writer extraordinaire Jason Hazeley and Jon's former BBC 6 Music colleague David Whitehead join Jon Holmes to look at the works of The One Show, ye mighty, and despair. Matt gets excited about dog food, cursed crying boy paintings cause fires (they don't), Idris Elba's questionable range and Salman Rushdie plays ping-pong (don't get excited, it's mentioned in passing). It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.10 - Dirty Recliners, Hazard Alley and Shove Your Sub Up Your Bum

Wed, 10 Apr 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The Mash's hilarious man behind the desk Steve N Allen joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to give the One Show a load of sweets, but sweets like the ones you hear about in urban legends with a load of crushed up razor blades inside them. This week: a joke shop reaches its final punchline, Subway Bloody Subway, Gyles Brandreth sees a UFO, a rude avocado and Alex is breathless. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.09 - Hidey Horse and Have We Got Have I Got News For You For You (Yes)

Tue, 09 Apr 2019 02:00:00 GMT

The Mash's superb man behind the desk Steve N Allen joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to lure the One Show into a bear-trap with the word 'criticism' crudely painted on one side, and 'envy' on the other. This week: Have I Got Have I Got News For You For You? Yes. Hmm. That sounds like a good idea for a podcast. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.08 - Howard Donald's Lino Theft, Fill Your Booze Boots and the Welsh KKK

Wed, 03 Apr 2019 02:00:00 GMT

BBC Radio's excellent Louise Pepper (broadcaster, travel witch and Danny Baker botherer) joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to dress up as The One Show's dead grandfather and try to scare it to death by leaping out of its bedroom cupboard in the middle of the night. This week: Howard Donald's lino theft, a mobile home with a shower full of booze, Matt Baker says 'gymnastical', a woman we're supposed to have heard of called Marine Babe (only she isn't) and some soil with magical powers. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.07 - Peppa Pig Class Traitor, Richard Carpenter's Tight Face and Les Dennis Meets The Pope

Tue, 02 Apr 2019 02:00:00 GMT

BBC Radio's brilliant Louise Pepper (broadcaster, travel witch and Danny Baker botherer) join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to put the One Show in a showgirl's dress and tie it to a railway track in the Wild West. This week: Les Dennis meets the Pope, weak topical jokes, single use bloody plastics, The Carpenter and Peppa Pig is a Capitalist pig. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.06 - Matt Baker's Jason Watkins Handstand Anecdote, Lewes and Getting Shazam Wrong

Wed, 27 Mar 2019 03:00:00 GMT

The great Jamie East (broadcaster, writer and forever the beloved Mr Holy Moly) join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to tempt the One Show over with a piece of cheese before humanely slamming a metal bar down on its neck. This week: Matt Baker's throwaway anecdote about having a handstand competition with actor Jason Watkins' father-in-law. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.05 - Michael the Bumblebee, Why Is No One Angry and An Awful Boy Entrepreneur

Tue, 26 Mar 2019 03:00:00 GMT

The great Jamie East (broadcaster, writer and forever the beloved Mr Holy Moly) join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to march against the One Show, and then be ignored by the country's press. This week: an awful boy entrepreneur, some made-up superheroes, Matt laughs at vegetarianism, and we belatedly tell Terry Wogan off for bullying James Harries. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.04 - Too Many Pine Martens, Ed Balls' Gap Year and An Eyelash On A Stick

Wed, 20 Mar 2019 03:00:00 GMT

Emma Bullimore (host of the great Series Linked podcast and celebrated entertainment reporter) joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to hold a buttercup under the One Show's chin before jabbing at its belly with a compass. This week: THE PINE MARTENS ARE HERE. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.03 - First Love Ponies, 10% Tess Daly and Elaine Paige's Confusing Fruit Fly Joke

Tue, 19 Mar 2019 03:00:00 GMT

Emma Bullimore (host of the great Series Linked podcast and celebrated entertainment reporter) joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to make the One Show look at the hand up there, while swiftly punching it in the belly with the free one. This week: Mary Berry's been to London Airport to meet some firemen, Sara Cox's First Love Pony, Matt Baker doesn't read a book, Comic Relief is on, men take on horses in a race and discarded Barbies. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.02 - British Tomatoes, Victorian Beverley Knight and Persecute The Welsh

Wed, 13 Mar 2019 03:00:00 GMT

The fantastic Craig Parkinson (beloved actor and host of the award-winning Two Shot podcast) join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to push the One Show into the staff room door and then run away as it gets told off. This week: Beverley Knight's Victorian history love, the Masterchefs don't get on, British tomatoes rule OK, Alex has a Stevie Wonder anecdote and the Kilimanjaro 9. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3.01 - Gregg Wallace screams NO, A Man Falls Over and A Tony Hancock Egg Joke

Tue, 12 Mar 2019 03:00:00 GMT

The brilliant Craig Parkinson (acclaimed actor and host of the award-winning Two Shot podcast) join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to lure the One Show to an underpass, and then Droog it up for a jolly. This week: Clement Atlee kills a snake with a stick, why actors like going on The One Show, Ricky Gervais looks at the local papers, the Derry Girls see someone falling over, Gregg Wallace shouts 'NO! and Alan Partridge's One Show-influenced new show influences this week's One Show. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.26 - Alex Jones Reviews TTOSS, Top Flight Time Machine and Bring Back Boob Inspectors

Mon, 24 Dec 2018 03:02:00 GMT

Andy Dawson and Sam Delaney - together the brilliant minds and voices behind the Top Flight Time Machine podcast - join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to wish the One Show a Merry Christmas, then report it to social services, claiming it's feeding its children solely on mince pies. This week: I Am A Boob Inspector, Bear Grylls unconvincingly mumbles about the NHS, Alex goes all husky, the One Show's commissioning process revealed and a real-life bombshell from one podcast listener - called ALEX JONES. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.25 - We Take Scouts Everywhere, Chris Evans's Big House and Samantha Bond Nearly Does The Eyes

Mon, 24 Dec 2018 03:00:00 GMT

Andy Dawson and Sam Delaney - together the brilliant minds and voices behind the Top Flight Time Machine podcast - join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to wish the One Show a Merry Christmas, then get drunk, set fire to its porch on the way back from Midnight Mass and run away. This week: don't do the eyes, Chris Evans has a big house, the BBC are very interested in scouts, Bear Grylls lacks anecdotes, the Bayeux tapestry appears on a wedding cake, and Clement Attlee is celebrated as Britain's bossest Prime Minister. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.24 - Loans For Ferrets, Olly Murs Won't Go Cruising and Ha Ha The Poor

Wed, 19 Dec 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The celebrated Raised By Wolves and Upstart Crow actor Helen Monks and the excellent Al Orme join Jon Holmes to ask the One Show on a date and then stand it up. This week: Olly Murs won't go cruising, a company that gives loans so you can buy a ferret, Helen discovers Jane Macdonald, everyone's stealing Billy Connolly's jokes and ha ha ha poor people. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.23 - Michael Buble's Canadian Delicacy, Dead Men's Coats and Billy Colonoscopy

Tue, 18 Dec 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The celebrated Raised By Wolves and Upstart Crow actor Helen Monks and the excellent Al Orme join Jon Holmes to ask The One Show to help us load a sofa into the back of a van before adducting it and keeping it in a well, ITS RUBS THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN AND PUTS IT IN THE BASKET. This week: Alex Jones has a bun in the oven (not literally, she's pregnant), Michael Buble pushes his Canadian delicacies, dead men's coats, Billy Colonscopy, Helen looks up 'fetching' on air, and John Bishop enjoys a violent curry. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.22 - Boris Johnson The Egg, Political Biscuits & Sally Phillips's Lewd Hand Gesture

Thu, 13 Dec 2018 00:33:29 GMT

The superb comedian Lizzie Roper and wonderful writer and broadcaster Jake Yapp join Jon Holmes to ask The One Show to what we say is a predetermined wrestling match, but then we quickly try to break its arms. This week: Joe Lycett draws Boris Johnson on an egg, some biscuits get political, Benjamin Zephaniah does a poem for God's sake, Sally Philips nearly explains a rude hand gesture and gallons of hot fresh sexism. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.21 - Matt Baker's Live Felch, Sexual Sausage Machines and Joe Lycett's Poo Tales

Tue, 11 Dec 2018 13:26:07 GMT

The superb comedian Lizzie Roper and wonderful writer and broadcaster Jake Yapp join Jon Holmes to ask The One Show to come to our house at which point we stage an intervention. This week: Matt Baker says 'felch'. You probably don't need to know anything else. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.20 - Rob Lowe Doesn't Play A Sax, Angelwing and Alex Jones Upsets The Alarm

Wed, 05 Dec 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The excellent stand-up comedian and actress Rosie Holt joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to dissect The One Show to find out (a) what makes it tick and (b) to kill it. This week: Matt Baker goes on a shooting rampage, Rob Lowe doesn't play the sax, Mick Hucknall's looks are discussed, there aren't any spoons, some birds eat some bread and Alex makes a mistake with the Alarm. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.19 - Mick Hucknall's Hot Vomit Hair, Kill Vegans and Let's Whisper At Perverts

Tue, 04 Dec 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The excellent stand-up comedian and actress Rosie Holt joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to ring up The One Show in the dead of night and scream obscenities at it down the phone. This week: Matt Baker is very excited by his own joke, the precise moment Mick Hucknall became disgusting is located, a vegan-killing editor meets a vegan, a false doctor tries to cancel an interview, and a woman wears a coat made out of Bungle. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.18 - Ruth Wilson Births Her Own Dad, Tales of Almond and A Vicar Has A Sleepover

Wed, 28 Nov 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The actor, broadcaster and Magic FM delight Tom Price and leading radio producer Con Mendez join Jon Holmes to call The One Show over and proceed to dress it down in front of its colleagues and co-workers. This week: a vicar has a sleepover, what's Matt Baker really like, Jon goes on radio with Marc Almond, Ruth Wilson remakes Back To The Future, Alex wears Pants on air and Matt Baker is frightened of his mobille. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.17 - Kit Harrington Eats Shit, Your Brother’s Skull Gets Stapled and How To Say Pain Quotidien

Tue, 27 Nov 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The actor, broadcaster and Magic FM delight Tom Price and leading radio producer Con Mendez join Jon Holmes to connect with The One Show online and then relentlessly neg it until it finally goes out with them. This week: 1970s Northern Irish dolphin and bear shows at a leisure centre, Kit Harrington eats shit, The One Show is your Brexit Hub and a brother has a staple pummelled into his skull. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.16 - Arise Sir Matt Baker, Pudsey's Drunk and Jane Garvey Swears More Than Us

Thu, 22 Nov 2018 03:00:51 GMT

The multi-award winning broadcaster and beloved host of BBC Radio 4's Woman's Hour Jane Garvey joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to tell the One Show it's dropped its wallet and then kick it up the arse when it bends over to pick it up. This week: Jane Garvey reveals her hidden One Show video, Pudsey is full of beer and migrants, Jon laughs about the gender pay gap, and we want Sir Matthew Baker. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.15 - Gender-Free Pudsey, Ronan Keating's Private Jet and Oceans of Vomit

Wed, 21 Nov 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The multi-award winning broadcaster and beloved host of BBC Radio 4's Woman's Hour Jane Garvey joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to beckon The One Show over to admire the sea-view from the clifftop, before hurling it over onto the rocks below, and attempting to claim on the life insurance we just bought in its name. This week: Jane Garvey wrecks The One Show's ambition to broadcast from Birmingham, that bloody rickshaw, Sandi Toksvig's medallion, the strange beauty of Eddie Redmayne the Fox, and Jon receives an email from Matt Baker's angry representative. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.14 - Gyles Brandreth Sends A Woman To Heaven, Pudsey Le Bear and Carol Vorderman's Blue Tits

Wed, 14 Nov 2018 03:00:00 GMT

Writer, comedian and broadcaster Natt Tapley joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to put The One Show in a ducking stool, see if it floats or sinks, and then toss it on a bonfire regardless. This week: Mysterious Man, why does it stink of Max Branning, Alex Jones creates beef with Jesus Jones and Gyles Brandreth sends another innocent woman to the afterlife. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.13 - Wowsomes, £600 Means Nothing To Rylan and Urrrgh, Salt Tongue

Tue, 13 Nov 2018 03:00:00 GMT

Writer, comedian and broadcaster Natt Tapley joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to put The One Show in the dock and immediately sentence it to death. This week: who is the Nazi Aslan, let's eat too many bananas, a man drinks the sea, Rylan dismisses 600 quid and WOWSOMES. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.12 - How We Hoaxed The One Show with Zac and Jay (and Louis Theroux)

Mon, 12 Nov 2018 03:00:00 GMT

Last week, Louis Theroux was a guest on The One Show, where he was introduced to two super-fans who explained they staged massive parties themed around Louis Theroux.

Only there aren't any massive parties. And they weren't super-fans.

They were YouTubers Zac and Jay and the whole thing was a hoax.

And it was so convincing, even our cynical minds at The The One Show Show fell for it. So who better to explain what it's like to go backstage at The One Show (expressly to play a prank on it) than the two hoaxers themselves: Zac Alsop and Jamie Rawsthorne!

This is a special episode finding out the inner workings of The One Show, what Ore is like when the cameras aren't rolling, and just how easy it is to fool the nation's least favourite prime-time show. Cue the trumpets (please don't prank the One Show by now playing trombones.)

Zac and Jay's YouTube video of their One Show experience is here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XS4276gBp1Y&frags=pl%2Cwn

And you can follow them (they're ace lads, btw) at:

Jamie - https://www.instagram.com/jamie_rawsthorne/

Zac - https://www.instagram.com/zacalsop/

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Episode 2.11 - Freddie Flintoff Hates The Moon, Anemone Fighting and Welsh Sewage

Tue, 06 Nov 2018 03:00:04 GMT

Genuine national radio producer and broadcaster Cornelius Mendez joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to lift The One Show high onto a pedestal and then push it over so it smashes. This week: Louis Theroux is intimidated by his obsessed fans, Freddie Flintoff disputes the moon landings, two anemones smash each other's faces in (if they have faces) and is Orville a sexual predator? It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.10 - A Magician Goes Wrong, Janus-Womack Is An Alien and It Smells Of Cannabis

Mon, 05 Nov 2018 03:00:00 GMT

Genuine national radio producer and broadcaster Cornelius Mendez joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to lift The One Show high onto a pedestal and then push it over so it smashes. This week: a magician spectacularly fails on live TV, Carrie Grant can't explain what an escape room is, a man smells some cannabis, a former rugby player in a clown suit and the Roswell Alien is back. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.9 - Bomb Dog Love, Paloma Faith's Drizzle Cake and Don't Be Mean to Martine

Tue, 30 Oct 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The host of the brilliant Smershpod John Rain joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to trap The One Show into a coffin and then start the crematorium (it's a classic James Bond reference, you fools!) This week: everyone gangs up on Martine McCutcheon, a man loves a bomb dog which isn't that bothered about him, Paloma Faith is on for what feels like forever and there's a film about pressing buttons. Good lord. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.8 - A Pig In A Tree, Sexual Blue Peter and Rick Wakeman's Dead Teacher

Wed, 24 Oct 2018 02:00:00 GMT

The brilliant Alex Zane joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to ask The One Show if it's dropped a coin, wait for it to bend over and look, before booting it right up the arse. This week: a Blue Peter presenter fumbles with a woman's breast, we meet the UK Trees of the Year, Rick Wakeman is pleased a teacher has died, why isn't everything see-through and there's a pig in a tree. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.7 - Welcome a Fly, Gerard Butler is a Sea-Daddy and Don’t Stab Maisie Williams

Tue, 16 Oct 2018 02:00:00 GMT

The wonderful actor-tress Carrie Quinlan joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to grab The One Show and try and push it over a cliff. This week: there's a fly in the studio, Gerard Butler is fit, KT Tunstall loves a tunnel, Matt's gone rickshaw crazy and a knife-fight with Maisie Williams goes wrong. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.6 - Rod Stewart's Sugar Puffs, ABBA Bjorn's Greek Taverna and Ey Up Roy Batty

Tue, 09 Oct 2018 02:00:00 GMT

The excellent Alex Sievewright joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to tangle with The One Show, push it to the floor and give it a dead leg. This week: Bjorn from ABBA sits in a fictional Greek Taverna, a man gets his hair cut like Roy Batty from Blade Runner, a student boils everyone's blood and Rod Stewart eats some Sugar Puffs in a wardrobe. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.5 - A Man Invents A Dog, Hand-Grenade Canal Fishing and Jenna Coleman Hates Jokes

Tue, 02 Oct 2018 02:00:00 GMT

The superb Absolute Radio newshound Matt Dyson and charming Amusical impresario Dave Cribb join Jon Holmes to walk this week's The One Show round behind the back of a barn to shoot it in the head. This week: a dead Scottish man invents a dog, Matt Baker slays a Tory MP, the show promotes illegal activity in canals with Uzis, everyone bullies Dara O'Brien, Mock The Week production schedule gossip, and Andy Kershaw is banging on about crabs for some reason. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.4 - A Real Dick of A Peacock, Bonnie Langford and Thingy-Shaped Thingys

Tue, 25 Sep 2018 02:00:00 GMT

The delightful brains behind the essential Popbitch website, Camilla Wright and Chris Lochery join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to get off with this week's The One Show behind its wife's back. This week: there's a right dick of a peacock, Bonnie Langford tells an anecdote about Noel Coward and some animal shit, Rachel Koo is celebrated like some sort of medieval monarch and thingys shaped like....thingys. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.3 - Sea Lice, The Martin Clunes Dog Quiz and A Man Lays A Cable

Tue, 18 Sep 2018 02:00:00 GMT

The wonderful writer of the essential Mr Gum books Andy Stanton joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to bring you your weekly force-feeding of The One Show. This week: a man lays a cable, Martin Clunes identifies dogs, some birds are misidentified and there's buckets of disgusting sea lice. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.2 - Hot Tub Worm Machine, An Awful Child and MN8’s Hatfield Ring Theft

Tue, 11 Sep 2018 02:00:00 GMT

The brilliant BBC broadcaster Sophie Law joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes to bring The One Show a bright and breezy booting. This week: there's worms in a hot-tub, MN8 lose some jewellery, Peter Crouch gets upset by grammar criticism and once again, no pine martens. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2.1 - Nick Knowles Discovers Camelot, the Euthanasia Rollercoaster and Denzel Sees It All

Tue, 04 Sep 2018 03:00:00 GMT

The all-round television marvel Vicky Thomas joins Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes for the new series examining Auntie BBC's leastloved nephew, The One Show. This week: Nick Knowles has discovered Camelot, a celebrity hairdresser has a midlife crisis next to a shit-smeared jester and Denzel Washington reveals to Jon that he can see it all. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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The The One Show Show Series 2: Coming in September!

Thu, 09 Aug 2018 02:00:00 GMT

The The One Show Show returns! The new series starts on Tuesday 4th September 2018. Set your alarms now (or just subscribe, it's much easier.)

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Episode 10: A Bit Of The Best of The The One Show Show Season 1

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 02:00:00 GMT

With The One Show on a World-Cup-based-hiatus (apart from us, absolutely no-one - NO-ONE - minds. Not even Alex), it's time for a self-congratulatory trip down memory lane. So ahead of Season 2, it can only be....The Best of The The One Show Show! Thanks to all of our Season 1 guests: Jay Rayner, Cornelius Mendez, Chris Heath, Jon Riley, Dave Cribb, Ellie Clifford, Dan Tetsell, Nico Tatarowicz, Jake Yapp, Joel Morris, John Rain and Julia Raeside. Some of these people don't appear in this Best Of, not because they weren't GREAT but because Marc hasn't saved the relevant episodes on his memory stick. Hands up, this doesn't bode well for the future of saving these priceless audio artefacts for the nation.

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Episode 9: Super Mouth Womb, My Wife’s Nuclear Weapon and A Link About Bumming

Tue, 19 Jun 2018 02:00:58 GMT

The excellent actors and writers Dan Tetsell (on Twitter at @tetsell) and Nico Tatarowicz (@nicotatz) join Jon Holmes and Marc Haynes for this week's dank trudge through the last week of The One Show. On this episode: Alex seemingly gives into one of Matt's sordid demands, a famous Muslim is taunted with food, Dr Alice Roberts presents a monster she's made and orchids. Loads of stupid orchids. It can only be....The The One Show Show!

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Episode 8: Jay Rayner Is A Free Man, Tommy Steele's Boat of Death and Your Dad's Racist

Tue, 12 Jun 2018 02:00:00 GMT

Joining Jon to talk all things One Show is Marc Haynes and, thrillingly, long-time One Show presenter Jay Rayner, fresh from throwing in the One Show-shaped towel! Peer behind the scenes of the nation's only One Show as Matt Baker squirms over his sexist pay, Tommy Steele tells the bleakest story in TV history, and Elaine Paige fingers Kiefer Sutherland live on telly. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 7: A Dog Smells A Newt, Dr. Michelle Keegan and Al Murray's Hot Sex Talk

Tue, 05 Jun 2018 02:00:00 GMT

Joining Jon to talk all things One Show are host of the excellent RULE OF THREE podcast Joel Morris and Jon Riley, superb TV producer. This week: Michelle Keegan saves a woman's life using only fictional medical training and a soft drink, a dog smells a glove that's been on a newt and Cyndi Lauper says we'll all have to speak Russian for some reason. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 6: Bring Me Calpol, A Giftbag and The Severed Head of Sheila Hancock

Tue, 29 May 2018 02:00:00 GMT

Joining Jon to talk all things One Show are host of the excellent SMERSHPOD John Rain and Marc Haynes, comedy writer and host of Wrestle Me! This week: Sheila Hancock completely coats off Sussex, Jon attempts to be a sexy Harry Potter and who on The One Show might be having sexual relations with a pig? It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 5: The Guest Is A Cake, Burn The Prick and Here Comes The Woodland Spoonman

Tue, 22 May 2018 02:00:00 GMT

Joining Jon to talk all things One Show are radio producer and milennial Ellie Clifford and Marc Haynes, comedy writer and host of Wrestle Me! This week: an old cake joins Matt and Alex on the sofa, a man is in the woods making spoons and everyone's got Royal Wedding fever and is making jellies in the shape of the Queen. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 4: Racist Impressions, No Pine Martens and the Northern Martin Scorsese

Tue, 15 May 2018 02:00:00 GMT

Joining Jon to talk all things One Show are acclaimed writer, broadcaster and voice of Dave TV, Jake Yapp and celebrated radio producer and host of the excellent Friends With Friends podcast Dave Cribb. This week: don't do a racist Mo Farah impression, Matt Baker's excuse for missing work and some boring bloody Pine Martens don't appear. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 3: Lesbian Cannibals, Farmer Sex and the Ethics of Replacing Matt Baker's Heart

Tue, 08 May 2018 00:49:17 GMT

Joining Jon to talk all things One Show are acclaimed radio producer and host of the excellent Friends With Friends podcast Dave Cribb and Cornelius Mendez, radio producer and a man who's actually BEEN to The One Show Set. This week: Sally Phillip's Lesbian Cannibal phone call, the ethics of replacing Matt Baker's heart and a TV show where farmers try to have sex. It can only be...The The One Show Show!

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Episode 2: Tonight's Guest - Chris Heath!

Tue, 01 May 2018 02:00:00 GMT

Joining Jon to talk all things One Show are acclaimed TV producer and host of the excellent Two Cups of Tea podcast Chris Heath and Marc Haynes, TV writer and one half of the hit podcast Wrestle Me! This week: Hoo Dennis, a rude MRI and inedible bog butter.

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Episode 1

Tue, 24 Apr 2018 02:00:00 GMT

Jon Holmes is joined by the Guardian's Julia Raeside and Wrestle Me's Marc Haynes for the deep dive you never knew you wanted: BBC1's flagship The One Show. Warning: there's swearing, adult themes and none of us particularly like The One Show.

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The The One Show Show trailer

Tue, 10 Apr 2018 02:00:33 GMT

Coming soon - The One Show gets the podcast it deserves. Join Jon Holmes for The The One Show Show.

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