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		<title>What A Nightmare!</title>
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		<copyright>Mart Tweedy</copyright>
		<itunes:keywords>real life stories,real life,off topic,canny crystals,mart tweedy,real stories,stories,personal stories,personal journal,comedy,funny,funny stories</itunes:keywords>
		<itunes:author>Mart Tweedy</itunes:author>
		<itunes:subtitle>A completely OFF-TOPIC podcast</itunes:subtitle>
		<itunes:summary><![CDATA[<p>Aside from my spiritual podcast, Canny Crystals, I feel like I've got SO many life stories that I just need to share with you all.. so this is my totally separate OFF-TOPIC podcast! </p><br><p>Do not listen to this podcast if you're squeamish, don't like vulgarity, or can't stand bad language, because it's going to be a mixture of all 3 unfortunately! Listen at your own peril!</p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></itunes:summary>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>Aside from my spiritual podcast, Canny Crystals, I feel like I've got SO many life stories that I just need to share with you all.. so this is my totally separate OFF-TOPIC podcast! </p><br><p>Do not listen to this podcast if you're squeamish, don't like vulgarity, or can't stand bad language, because it's going to be a mixture of all 3 unfortunately! Listen at your own peril!</p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></description>
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			<title>The time I dated an absolute psychopath</title>
			<itunes:title>The time I dated an absolute psychopath</itunes:title>
			<pubDate>Fri, 15 Dec 2023 13:02:17 GMT</pubDate>
			<itunes:duration>18:48</itunes:duration>
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			<description><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I dated an absolute psychopath that told me his parents were French, he was an air steward, and his house was mid-rennovation when he was actually fresh out of jail for FRAUD! FML! I don't half get myself into some predicaments!!!</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></description>
			<itunes:summary><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I dated an absolute psychopath that told me his parents were French, he was an air steward, and his house was mid-rennovation when he was actually fresh out of jail for FRAUD! FML! I don't half get myself into some predicaments!!!</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></itunes:summary>
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			<title>The time I crashed a courtesy car in a dogging site</title>
			<itunes:title>The time I crashed a courtesy car in a dogging site</itunes:title>
			<pubDate>Thu, 30 Nov 2023 12:37:48 GMT</pubDate>
			<itunes:duration>9:19</itunes:duration>
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			<description><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I crashed a courtesy car in a dogging site, OF ALL THE PLACES. I then had to get pulled out of a ditch by the doggers themselves. Fun times!</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></description>
			<itunes:summary><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I crashed a courtesy car in a dogging site, OF ALL THE PLACES. I then had to get pulled out of a ditch by the doggers themselves. Fun times!</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></itunes:summary>
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			<title>The time I crashed my car dressed as a Christmas tree</title>
			<itunes:title>The time I crashed my car dressed as a Christmas tree</itunes:title>
			<pubDate>Mon, 23 Oct 2023 05:00:24 GMT</pubDate>
			<itunes:duration>16:13</itunes:duration>
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			<description><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I crashed my car dressed as a Christmas tree and ended up being arrested and locked up, ON CHRISTMAS DAY! FML. This was 13 years ago so PLEASE don't judge.</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></description>
			<itunes:summary><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I crashed my car dressed as a Christmas tree and ended up being arrested and locked up, ON CHRISTMAS DAY! FML. This was 13 years ago so PLEASE don't judge.</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></itunes:summary>
		</item>
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			<title>The time I sent a video of myself hissing to my housing developers</title>
			<itunes:title>The time I sent a video of myself hissing to my housing developers</itunes:title>
			<pubDate>Mon, 09 Oct 2023 05:00:42 GMT</pubDate>
			<itunes:duration>10:14</itunes:duration>
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			<acast:episodeUrl>the-time-i-sent-a-video-of-myself-hissing-to-my-housing-deve</acast:episodeUrl>
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			<description><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I got my kitchen ceiling fixed after 9 weeks of it leaking in from the flat roof outside!</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></description>
			<itunes:summary><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I got my kitchen ceiling fixed after 9 weeks of it leaking in from the flat roof outside!</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></itunes:summary>
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			<title>The time I had a bird in my car</title>
			<itunes:title>The time I had a bird in my car</itunes:title>
			<pubDate>Mon, 02 Oct 2023 05:00:45 GMT</pubDate>
			<itunes:duration>9:55</itunes:duration>
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			<description><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I was hit in the head by a BIRD whilst driving home from work, and how it prophecised the death of Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett.</p><br><p>I found the video of the bird on my old Facebook - https://fb.watch/nobRgnCG7B/</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></description>
			<itunes:summary><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I was hit in the head by a BIRD whilst driving home from work, and how it prophecised the death of Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett.</p><br><p>I found the video of the bird on my old Facebook - https://fb.watch/nobRgnCG7B/</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></itunes:summary>
		</item>
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			<title>The time I shat myself on a main road</title>
			<itunes:title>The time I shat myself on a main road</itunes:title>
			<pubDate>Thu, 21 Sep 2023 16:59:32 GMT</pubDate>
			<itunes:duration>17:12</itunes:duration>
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			<description><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I found out what my allergies and intolerances were!</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></description>
			<itunes:summary><![CDATA[<p>A story all about how I found out what my allergies and intolerances were!</p><br><p>Tag me on Instagram @marttweedy - <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marttweedy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">instagram.com/marttweedy</a></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></itunes:summary>
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			<title>What A Nightmare! (Trailer)</title>
			<itunes:title>What A Nightmare! (Trailer)</itunes:title>
			<pubDate>Wed, 13 Sep 2023 15:33:10 GMT</pubDate>
			<itunes:duration>1:11</itunes:duration>
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			<description><![CDATA[<p>Make sure you hit that SUBSCRIBE button to be the first to be notified about future episodes...</p><br><p>Mart x</p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></description>
			<itunes:summary><![CDATA[<p>Make sure you hit that SUBSCRIBE button to be the first to be notified about future episodes...</p><br><p>Mart x</p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>]]></itunes:summary>
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