We’re diving into The Polyvagal Theory, a simple but powerful way to understand why you sometimes feel calm, anxious, or completely shut down for “no reason.”

Sources

Polyvagal Theory in Therapy – Deb Dana

The Pocket Guide to the Polyvagal Theory – Stephen Porges

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What counts as an affair?

Why do they happen?

And what does it really take to heal when trust has been broken?

Affairs don’t always mean the end. For some couples, they become the start of something more honest, intimate, and real.

Resource:

After the Affair — Janis Abrahms Spring, PhD

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We all give and receive love differently, yet many couples end up feeling unseen or unappreciated — not because love is missing, but because it’s being expressed in the wrong language.

Andrea explores the five love languages — and explains how understanding both your own and your partner’s preferences can dramatically improve connection, intimacy, and emotional safety.

Because love isn’t just about intention — it’s about impact.

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We cover:

• Why natural lubrication varies (and that’s normal)
• The best types of lube — and which to avoid
• How to use lube safely with toys and condoms
• Why flavoured and warming lubes can cause more harm than heat
• Why communication about comfort is the sexiest thing you can do

Because great sex isn’t just about passion — it’s about preparation.

Resources:

Come As You Are — Emily Nagoski, PhD

Sexual Health Foundation (UK)

Brook.org.uk

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From constantly seeking reassurance to pulling away when things feel too close, attachment patterns often show up in ways we don't immediately recognise. This episode breaks down the four main attachment styles, how they affect our relationships, and what we can do to build more secure connections.

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In this episode, Andrea breaks down the myths, excuses, and outdated attitudes around condoms — and reminds us that protection is not up for negotiation.

Its important because STI rates are rising and condom use is at an all-time low.

Great sex is about communication, care, and consent — not risk.

Resources:

Sexwise UK – Condoms and Protection

Brook.org.uk – Sexual Health Education

Terrence Higgins Trust

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Sex therapy. It sounds intimidating — clinical, serious, maybe even awkward.

But in reality?

It’s simply a safe, confidential space to talk about sex with a trained professional — without shame, pressure, or judgement.

In this episode of Conversations We Need To Have, Andrea breaks down what psychosexual therapy actually is, who it’s for, and what really happens in a session.

Spoiler: it’s talking — not touching.

Sex therapy is a professional, confidential talking therapy. It is educational, psychological, and relational — not physical or hands-on.

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Chimps represent dominance, hierarchy, and power.

Bonobos represent empathy, cooperation, and play.

So what happens when we start leading our relationships — and our conflicts — more like bonobos?

This episode sets the tone for the Conversations We Need to Have series: honest, human, sex-positive, and grounded in science and compassion.

Resources Mentioned:

Sex at Dawn – Christopher Ryan & Cacilda Jethá

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Before we dive in, there are a few important things I need you to know.

I don’t know you personally, which means I’m not your therapist.

Everything I share here is general information, not individual advice.

I’m a licensed therapist — but I only provide therapy to my lovely clients here in Surrey, and across the UK online, who’ve completed the proper consent process.

So, please enjoy my content for what it is — thoughtful conversation, research-based insights, and hopefully a few “aha” moments about sex and relationships.

But if something really resonates and you’d like personalised support, reach out to a licensed professional who can tailor advice to you.

A quick heads-up — I talk about sex, bodies, desire, and real human stuff, so you might occasionally hear a swear word or explicit language.

It’s never for shock value — just part of honest, grown-up conversation.

And finally, you’ll hear me use a mix of pronouns when I speak — because pleasure, intimacy, and love belong to everyone, regardless of gender or identity.

So, take what fits, leave what doesn’t, and remember — this space is for learning, not for labelling.

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