Steve puts on his favourite cocktail dress to act as the quizmaster for some questions about the winners of the 2005 MTV Australia music video awards, leading to some painfully bad audio as two middle-aged blokes try unsuccessfully to remember the lyrics to Hollaback Girl...and Tony has a bit of a thrombo as he recalls the joy of dealing with Australia’s leading telecoms company. Oh, and an extinct cartoon bird pops up as an example of what is carefully described as the ‘retail’ nature of Australian advertising.

All this and much, much less as we welcome you back to the WA Salvage of podcasts about old advertising with a look at a Telstra TV commercial from 2005 pushing the telco giant’s BigPond internet service offering. Have a look at the ad in question here...https://youtu.be/Rh3Eu2NtG_U

Have a listen and I think you’ll agree…we aren’t fancy but we really are cheap.

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Buy a ticket on this week’s fun bus and you’ll be part of the discussion about what Levis want in their ads where we discover that unsurprisingly its America and arse shots in that order.

Tones mines a rich vein of personal experience to talk about casting bum doubles before revealing a hitherto undiscovered ability to be discreet and there’s a bit of chit-chat about rodent eating as a PR strategy.

It's 1985 and Tony’s watching Grange Hill, desperately trying to make sure he doesn’t catch girl germs and BMXing with his mates… whilst I’m discovering fashion and loose underwear in-between hangovers.

More importantly Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher are installing nuclear weapons in Berkshire and this forces the agency of the decade to hire a pretty boy, take him back to the 1960s and then force him to act in a 60 second soft core porn movie for teenage girls…in the process creating an ad so successful that the client demanded that it was taken off air. 

Have a listen as we review the only ad ever to feature as talent a man who turned down Kate Moss for that bird that worked with Terry Christian on The Word and have a loo at the ad here https://youtu.be/G1c-bfv2sds.

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We’ve reviewed quite a few ads on the pod now so it seemed like as good a time as any to have a quick look at what we loved and what we didn’t and to create a hit parade of the top 20.

Of course once we looked at the top 20, a couple of glaring errors became obvious…so we changed them around.

You probably won’t agree with the list, ten minutes after we’d finished it Tony didn’t either, but there’s lots more important stuff for us to be dealing with. For instance, we seriously need to get to the bottom of why all the cheese in Coles is now named after porn video categories. Vintage, Natural, Hard, Semi-hard, Mature, and of course, that perennial favourite Blue Vein.

Anyway. Enjoy the list of the top 20 ads. Then the argument about the list. Then the new list.

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In the year that Bonn Scott drank himself to death, Kleenex went to a remote Scottish island to make a TV advert with an adult grizzly bear as the talent. The bear escaped. Of course it did, 1984 was that kind of year.

Join as we have a chat about a KitKat ad that features Captain Alberto Bertorelli, a Connect 4 ad of unknown provenance and the ad voted the UK’s 18th favourite in a poll that Tony mocks every time it’s mentioned.

Oh, there's a quiz as well. And Tony sings. Basically more of the usual bollox.

Join us as we let you gaze in horror at the advertising that’s stuck with us like holy on the Pope. One features a spiv-like character about to rip-off a load of kids who’re desperate to get into the music industry and the other stars a chainsmoking housewife with a really smelly dog whose idea of fun is to drop a pinger and do the vacuuming.

Have a look here https://youtu.be/kZXl_FBUfpQ and be more kinder whydontcha.

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Jason's the founder and CEO of Sector 5, the Asia Pacific’s foremost Executive Search business for advertising agencies and their clients. The team at Classic Ads Towers were on a Zoom call with Jason (who lives in Tokyo) and thought it'd be great to get him to tell us about his favourite ad, because, you know, he's in the business and all that.

So this episode is a quick review of Jason’s favourite advert. It’s bound to be a work of creative genius right? A showcase of the best Japan’s advertising industry has to offer? Well you be the judge…

It's all in the sombrero apparently.

Have a look at the ad here...https://youtu.be/yLq0YyzLXcU

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We meander down memory lane, swerving the white dogshit and that bloke your parents called uncle who spent an inordinate amount of time trying to get you to come and have a look at the train set in his shed… to find out how Tones vandalised his Mum’s car with the cigarette lighter before not being allowed in the monkey enclosure at Dudley Wildlife Park because the family Ford Escort had velour seats.

And if you stick with it you’ll hear as a veteran fisherman gets in touch and leaves us a personal message for inclusion in this episode where we review the John West TV commercial voted as the UK’s funniest telly ad…ever.

Yes, the love child of Worzel Gummidge and Tony’s Dad joins the list of celebs who’re now using the world’s foremost podcast about old ads and paedophile celebrities as a platform to amplify their media profile, after Enya and Wolf Kahler, the original John West now gets on the blower to reveal himself to be a cuddly old chap deeply committed to the use of pilchard juice as an aphrodisiac and hell-bent on raping the ocean of all suitable fish-based protein.

So join shit advertising suit Steve Cooke and award-winning advertising creative and TV commercial director Tony Williams as we take a look at a TV ad featuring a bloke in a bear suit with Bob the Builder as the voiceover talent.

Have a look at the advert on our YouTube channel here https://youtu.be/rj4T-cZKbB8 and also as promised, here's the link to the most Australia video ever...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIRT7lf8byw

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UK listeners probably have little sympathy over a mere three day lockdown when they haven’t been outside since April last year, but let’s be honest, if you live in Britain you probably don’t want to go outside anyway when the entire place is ankle-deep in litter and smells like a tramps arse most of the time.

Anyway… join has-been advertising suit Steve Cooke, and Mount Lawley’s premier noodle expert and TV commercial director Tony Williams as we explain how Colonel Dietrich got a face transplant, before moving on to find out whether Tones would leave Jennifer Aniston for Angelina Jolie, how long it takes to train a crack squad of squirrels to crack nuts and whether the leader of the Mujahadeen Brigades has a future in advertising.

This is the episode where Tony reveals that his cold, shriveled heart has no room in it for even one of the 250,000 colourful bouncing balls used in today’s ad for Sony’s Bravia TVs.

The levels of downbeat on display from Western Australia’s foremost Jimmy Saville impersonator will remind some of our listener of the Lego Kipper ad where the absence of Tommy Cooper led to Tony sitting in the studio for an hour and a half displaying the face he usually reserves for a difficult poo.

Yes, Tony’s an absolute fun sponge in this one. Behaving like a man from a near future where happiness has been banned and everyone has to walk to work in bare feet over paths strewn with Lego… but for you and I it’s 2005, 100 million people in Indonesia are sat in the dark, devastated because they can’t watch Ken Barlow getting married again, and more importantly, Fallon London is about to get a Gold lion at Cannes after buying every ball in the contiguous United States.

Enjoy the show and have a look at the Sony ad on our YouTube channel here https://youtu.be/-MzEuJKjc3I

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Luckily enough Tones has a bit of experience working in Tokyo and even more luckily we persuaded his wife Natsuko to put in her 10 Yen’s worth as we look at an ad for the world’s most popular cup noodle brand.

By the end of this episode we can pretty much guarantee that you’re going to be equipped to hold up your end of any conversation about the difference between ramen and udon, expound knowledgeably on noodle-eating technique, and have a great story for cocktail parties about how a 61 year old man stumbled across a way to create a product that 40 years later sells 25 billion units a year across the globe.

Have a listen and find out whether this ad really turned the word ‘hungree’ into a Japanese version of ‘wassup’, who took PeeWee on a Big Adventure and got the gig doing the effects, and how come there are still at least three people around the world who haven’t heard of Bananas in Pyjamas.

All this and much, much less as we continue to spectacularly live down to your expectations of what actually constitutes entertainment.

Join us as we look at a Japanese TV commercial from 1993 that will either have you shaking your head in bemusement or will get your smiley muscles back into tip-top working condition.

Either way, we’re just glad to have a platform where we’re able to share our annoyance at the American ban on all things kangaroo, even as hordes of the hopping bastards attack our pensioners, devastate our petunias and cause global warming with their outback gas.

Have a look at the ad on our YouTube channel at https://youtu.be/iiuiWnforTo and give us a review if you’ve got a minute? Ta very.

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Some of our listeners, or at least those who are not permanently glued to the sunny window in a fugue state, may remember that we recently reviewed a 30 second ad for lemonade that managed to shoehorn the brand name in 24 times.

Well brace yourself, we’ve been contacted again by Ireland’s best-selling solo musical artist and it’s safe to say that’s she’s unhappy with the current podcast content, sending us an abuse burger with the lot to get her point across while managing to drop the f-bomb 37 times in just under 3 minutes.

Elsewhere in this week’s episode we follow the mind-blowing revelations about how Lexus source the leather for their car seats with some less mind-blowing esoterica about Mondegreens.

What’s a Mondegreen I hear you ask? You have two options here - option a - look it up on Google and then have a nice lie down or option b - have a listen...you'll find out why Jimmy Hendrix is kissing a guy.

So, strap in, buckle up, take your meds, brush the crumbs off your onesie and join rubbish suit Steve Cooke and his co-host, award-winning advertising creative and TV ad director Tony Williams, as they take a look at a telly ad from 1989 that won the Cannes Grand Prix.

If that’s not enough for you we’ll hear how Steve won the lottery of life and got the non-farty chair, find out which on-screen father and son duo shagged the same Nazi and get all nostalgic about Sunday nights at 6pm on Radio 1.

So, don’t go out tonight, everything’s going to be alright, there’s a bathroom on the right.

Have a look at the ad on our YouTube channel here https://youtu.be/JZ07FbgQkqk and give us a review whydontcha it would make everybody involved extremely happy:)

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This week the Pound shop time machine that is our podcast about old ads makes a crash landing in 2003… where I haven’t slept for two years, Tones is probably still out and about with Jennifer Love-Hewitt hanging off his every word and everyone’s worked out that if you’re doing an impersonation of Morgan Freeman and you say the words “Titty sprinkles” you’re pretty much a shoe-in for a job as his double.

In this episode Tony decides he’s taking over researching the year’s event during the actual recording and whilst it's not actually a car crash there is a total absence of any information about Ken Barlow.

Have a listen as we look at an ad for the 7th generation Honda Accord, a car so boring that it’s quite possible to believe that a Klingon cloaking device came as standard on the base model.

And yet…the ad that launched it is a thing of balletic, kinetic beauty, that nearly 20 years later has yet to be matched for the complexity of its simplicity.

Find out how a commercial that would take £1m to make was pitched using the Mousetrap board game and a clip from a film that features the world’s worst Cockney accent, what Heath Robinson and Rube Ginsberg have in command have a listen to the 20 year old rap song Honda thought would help the brand get down with da yoof innit.

Have a look at the ad on our Youtube channel at https://youtu.be/_RzULJpl8Jw

*Terms and conditions apply. Some minds may not be blown.

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He snaps out of it just in time to seize the opportunity to go full-Bill Clinton during the intro then indulges himself with some vintage Jimmy Saville / Operation Yewtree references before insulting the entire population of Ireland.

Perhaps more importantly we’re treated to some phone-in action when the one and only Wolf Kahler calls up to personally thank us for reviving his career after the positive review of his performance in the 1993 Ferrero Rocher advert.

This week we're taking a look behind the cat litter box of history and rewinding to 1993 with an advert that set a new record for lack of casting diversity whilst managing to bin more cash in production than had ever been spent before in the making of an Australian telly ad.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Geoff Dixon from QANTAS and John Singleton from Singleton Ogilvy & Mather had a love child and it wasn’t rock and roll, it was an advert that became an icon of Australian advertising, central to the building of a global brand. And it all came about because the Chairman of QANTAS has no mates and had nowhere to go on New Year’s Eve in 1997.

So two big egos and a shedload of cash. Global locations. Busloads of cute children. Boab trees. The outback. Random blokes on horses. Footy. Don Bradman. Sam Kekovitch. Lamingtons. Drop bears. Mullets. V8 utes. The Sydney Harbour Bridge. Mrs Mangle. The Wiggles. I still call Australia home. All the ingredients are there…

But after Singo had edited out all the ugly kids did the end product have the consistency of a week-old QANTAS bread roll or was it as light and fluffy as Geoff Dixon’s Filofax?

Check out the ad on our YouTube channel at https://youtu.be/zr0qV1r0aUM.

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Elsewhere there’s a lot of love for the actress universally known as ‘Duckface’, more speculation about the Queen’s toilet habits and some erotic anticipation on a canal up north.

In another edition of our BBH love-fest we're having a chat about a 1993 TV advert for Boddingtons beer that parodies the Walls Cornetto Gondola ad by replicating it virtually scene-for-scene but with a better script, better talent, a better director, a better DoP, and a better location.

The ad also improves on its Cornetto-based inspiration by featuring a swan and of course isn’t for ice cream that tastes of 1970s bedsits and the disappointment of being rejected by your first true love at your best friend’s sister’s party when you were 14.

How about a review? At least think about it. Even a one star jobbie would help fill the deep and empty reservoir of need that consumes our waking lives.

Ta very much. Have a look at the ad on our YouTube channel here if you fancy it https://youtu.be/zrtqWoyo1pE.

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We’ll hear how a young Gene Wilder got his big break in a gondola and how one half of a one-hit wonder got the gig massacring a classic piece of 19th century Italian music so that Walls could put a chest freezer in every Spar in the UK.

More importantly however, this is the week where Steve cons Tones into singing you the top ten advertising jingles of all time as voted by the British public in 2006.

Have a look at the Cornetto ad on our YouTube channel at https://youtu.be/M1y-juB0RuU and get a load of a bonus look at the Apple ad for the launch of its 'Lisa' IBM business computer competitor.

Climb on board pod-people.

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Ah yes the seventies, where a glass of lemonade is a guilty pleasure to be taken in the middle of the night and the ad industry believes the only way to get you to buy some is to sing the brand name to you 24 times in a 30 second advert.

Come along with us as we hopscotch through the white dogshit of 1973 and we'll introduce you to Elvis Costello’s Dad and gargle our way through a review of a 30 second TV ad for a 176 year old carbonated drink that features two actors who would go on to forever have the words “Star of the Secret Lemonade drinker advert” appended to their names, because everything they ever did after it was shit.

See the ad for yourself on our YouTube channel at https://youtu.be/ciD3XCTr0h0 and get in touch if you fancy it at steve@welcometoepic.com. Subscribe, give us a like, give us a review and look out for us on Twitter if that's your thing.

 Tara for now.

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There’s a bit of friction between Steve and Tones about the quality of the talent’s knickers and what they say about veracity in advertising. Some chat about when a pot plant can be referred to as a bush and we’ll find out why one of the ads needed an MA certificate so that they could show the results of some home baking.

‘Saggy Pants’ – the one with the knickers and ‘Cock and Balls’ the one with the cock and balls, are our favourites but will any of them end the awards season with Short Walk and a Handshake for the creative team?

Have a listen and see what you think. Feel free to drop us a line at steve@welcometoepic.com and if you fancy it, give us a like, a review and a subscribe and have a look at the ads we’re talking about on our YouTube channel at https://youtu.be/fEQbyZHvRI4

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Part two is the riveting quiz denoument and a cheeky listen will hear us dragged into discussions about bad jeans and worse ads. What’s that you say? It’s like deja vu all over again, again?

If you liked the first part then you’re in for a treat. If you weren’t that keen then we’ve got nothing for you except to confirm that we’re about to live down to your expectations.

Thanks for tuning in peeps.

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After 10 months without any community COVID infections we got a live one here in Western Australia and last Sunday the state went into a 5-day lockdown.

So what did we do? Just like every other right-minded West Australian we jogged straight down to the bottle shop for some Daddy’s Little Helper then sparked up a quiz about British advertising in the 70s.

If it’s drama you’re after from your podcasts then you’re going to thrill at the competitive back and forth of this episode as myself, Steve Cooke and my co-host award-winning advertising creative and TV ad director Tony Williams, the world’s most competitive man, fight for the title of ‘Bloke who knows the most about dodgy British ads from the 70s’.

Just how competitive is Tones? Well he’s so competitive that he can make getting a front row seat for the school play look like an Olympic event; a man so competitive that he spent three years in training for the kindy parents egg and spoon race.

For our Australian listeners I think we can safely describe the content and execution of the quiz as shonky. For our non-Australian listener then give it a go and you’ll find out what shonky means.

This is part one of the quiz and if you think you know who David Dundas is and who drove to Luton Airport in a Hillman Imp before being wafted to paradise then you’re in for a right old treat.

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Yes, welcome to 1981, where this week you get to listen to Tones and me argue about who the target audience is for a 45 second TV ad (with no people in it) for Lego, before I give Tones some bad news about Tommy Cooper and his little face goes all crumply and he has a scoring tantrum.

A cheeky listen will also allow you to decide whether I’m wrong about the working classes not being allowed to play with Yummy Mummy favourite toy Lego, because they have no imagination (because why would you buy Lego when you have a telly, duh?).

As an aside, Tony’s kids think that Lego should be used as an anti-terrorist device and strewn around sensitive Ministry of Defence sites like the place where they keep Margaret Thatcher’s talking-brain-in-a-jar so that Jacob Rees-Mogg can nip round once a week and spank one out while she reads the Wealth of Nations to him. Adam Smith has a lot to answer for. So does a five day lockdown.

Annnnnnnyway, have a squiz at the ad on our YouTube channel https://youtu.be/OXpsuCX46yA and see what state-of-the art stop motion looked like in 1981.

Get in touch at steve@welcometoepic.com whydoncha? Questions, insults or suggestions for ads to review are all welcome and help us to feel relevant and needy needed. In the meantime, give us a like on any of the socials and be kind to each other, it doesn’t cost anything does it FFS?

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This week’s listen takes us back to 2005 and an Australian TV ad that suggests that if you’re dinkie-die then your celebration of yet another stop on the global Euro-sponsored genocide tour known as colonialism should be marked by eating baby sheep.

It’s fair to say that this little beeeeee-wdie from Meat and Livestock Australia has not travelled as well as Bez from the Happy Mondays but has probably got a slightly better reputation than Schappelle Corby.

Sixteen years is a long time in advertising. In 2005 insulting Brazilian people and putting forward the idea of capital punishment for vegetarians was funny and a bit edgy. In 2021 Hungry Jacks (that’s Burger King to you non-Antipodes) are selling Whoppers with no meat in and your brand now looks about as relevant as the Filofax that Harvey Weinstein left down the back of his casting couch.

So join us as an ex-Australian advertising agency of the decade enlists an ex-footie player to try to make lamb on Australia Day as popular as turkey at Christmas.

You’ll love this advert just as long as you don’t like Italian or Asian food, and you’re not a hippy, on the dole, a vegetarian or a vegan. Non-Australians probably aren’t going to be that enthusiastic either.

Our very own swamp - Pauline Hanson, Clive Palmer and Tony Abbot - told me they loved it though, so you’ll be in good company if it does float your boat.

Drop into our YouTube channel at https://youtu.be/cCw-BRm9K1M if you'd like to see the ad and have a look here https://www.youtube.com/user/HowToTalkAustralians at the hilarious short films mentioned in the pod that skewer Australian people and their attitudes with genuine warmth.

Get in touch at steve@welcometoepic.com with suggestions, insults and ads that you'd like us to review.

And go about your life and work with love in your hearts.

If you're in Blighty then swerve the yellow snow. If you're in Western Australia then calm down FFS, it's only 5 days. If you're in the USA then hello and welcome back to the democracy club, we really missed you.

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Come with us back to 1999.

In 1999 all some of us had to deal with was deciding which party you were going to where you wouldn’t cop off. It was nailed on that at the turn of the millennium, wherever you ended up, some bloke was going to shout “Wassup” at you and your liver was going to end up looking like a beefburger.

Tones was probably at some soiree with Jennifer Love-Hewitt doing lines and chatting to Tom Kuntz about the gold pencil he won at the One Awards even as Rod Hull fell off the roof of his house with his hand up an emu’s arse.

There were ads and some of them were good and one of them had a hook that made it genetically impossible for men aged 18 – 24 not to shout it at each other when they were pissed.

Wassup with that Anheuser-Busch?

Have a listen to this episode and find out how the ad industry appropriated black youth culture to sell beer. Visuals on our YouTube channel here https://youtu.be/dTQkbJ350OQ.

Enya doesn’t sing in this one, which is disappointing frankly.

Get in touch at steve@welcometoepic.com with questions, or if you’d like to suggest an ad for us to review.

In the meantime, stay cool, stay safe, love each other and give us a like on Tikbookagram whydontcha?

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Prepare to be entertained by;

(a) An old-fashioned Old-Etonian pervert.

(b) The Queen and her bowel problems.

(c) The ad-industry giant now forced to live in a cave in the middle-east because he hit Nigella.

(d) A Belgian bloke with a face like Ivy Tilsley after the plastic surgery.

Have a listen and join us back in 2013 as we take a look at the sixth advert in a series called Live Test which Swedish advertising agency Forsman & Bodenfors had created for Volvo Trucks.

This one is called ‘Epic Splits’ and stars Jean Claude Van Damme and a couple of really big articulated lorries going backwards at speed.

Think about it. Can you see it in your mind's eye?

No you can't. You can’t do it.

Nothing prepares you for the epic nature of this ad. Nothing. Don’t believe me?

Drop into our Youtube channel at https://youtu.be/ws0BchvYj4Y and watch Jean-Claude Van Damme in all his wince-inducing, leg-splitting glory.

Oh and Enya sings.

Get in touch at steve@welcometoepic.com with questions or if you’d like to suggest an ad for us to review and in the meantime, give us a like on any of the socials but more importantly STAY SAFE PEOPLE!

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You’ll need to prepare yourself as we enter the murky world of political campaigning and expose the role played by verucas in shaping the course of the Brexit campaign.

The people who voted it the most heartwarming TV ad ever are all now sat by the sunny window looking forward to telling Jonny Foreigner to fuck off back where he came from then wondering why there’s nobody around to clean the window after they just licked it.

So gather your disappointments around you as we slog up the really steep hill of an ad that first aired in 1973 and then proceeded to weasel itself into the hearts of a nation. Is it for Nigel Farage’s Brexit Party or for nostalgia-peddlers Hovis? You be the judge.

Here’s the Youtube link if you must watch it https://youtu.be/IbLUbcbd27s and this one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkonymPyp5g&t=91s links to a short documentary by the British Film Institute detailing how they restored the original film, digitised it to 4k then gave it back to Hovis so they could recycle the original saccharin, sentimental, post-war nostalgia-fest and claim it was a marketing gift to the nation.

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We get paid to make ads that sell stuff that people get paid to make so that they can go out and buy stuff that we make adverts for.

You know how it goes, and it’s not our problem if the stuff you’re paying us to sell is shit right?

No matter how much we explain our role in the free market economy you still all hate us apparently. None more so than Jerry Seinfeld.

Jerry’s a hypocrite and he’s quite mean as well, although he does have a collection of 150 vintage cars so…yay Jerry the Aldi Jay Leno!

Have a listen as Jerry is mean to a bunch of ad people at an awards ceremony where he’s receiving an award for doing the work that they paid him to do so he can buy more vintage cars.

Here he is being a smug cunt on our YouTube channel https://youtu.be/qifGWbFzNKQ

Enjoy. Or not as the case may be.

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Yes?

Never mind. Watch this ad and it’ll be OK to tell the world that your best mate is an animated marsupial** or that all you really want do with your life is take on jobs for various crime syndicates in a world that allows you to do whatever you need to get the job done.***

Welcome to Classic Ads From Simpler Times where in this episode you can join Steve and Tones for some consequence-free living as they review the 1996 Playstation TV commercial, Double-Life. The ad that told us that it’s glamorous to spend the weekend knee-deep in crisp packets and coke cans because it’s OK to put more effort into your digital life than it is into your real life.

It's a multi-cultural art movie featuring the cutest Scottish boy who ever lived so have a look at the ad for yourself on our Youtube channel at https://youtu.be/Gjt7sSd2G3Y

Get in touch at steve@welcometoepic.com with questions or if you’d like to suggest an ad for us to review.

In the meantime, subscribe, give us a like, look for us on Twitter and stay safely at home FFS.

* Yes, OK, Mario Kart’s a Nintendo game.

** Crash Bandicoot

*** Grand Theft Auto

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Join as we discuss the issue in our review of an ad for the brand-new Fiat Strada, a car handbuilt by robots out of tissue paper.

No voiceover, no shots of the car driving around town with a British man at the wheel smoking a pipe and smacking his children at the traffic lights. Simply a ballet of machinery accompanied by an opera, with a nod to Star Wars and The Italian Job.

Join us in a world where the working class has been abolished and see the ad for yourself on our Youtube channel at https://youtu.be/U3SIWulBkiE

If you have questions or you want to suggest an ad for us to review email us at steve@welcometoepic.com and in the meantime, subscribe, give us a like, look for us on Twitter and stay safe out in there.

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Who do you turn to when you’ve just closed 11 of your 22 factories and laid off 6,000 workers?

Bartle Bogle Hegarty of course.

There are two theories about how to win an argument with John Hegarty and as we’ll hear, neither works. So settle down and listen-in as we review the ad that Sir John had to pitch to Levis three times before they bought the idea.

What did he pitch them?

He pitched them Jack Kerouac’s novel On the Road but with added old man trousers with really good creases.

What did they get?

They got a fucked up Chevy Chevelle, a slightly overweight Highway Patrol man, the director’s best mate and Flat Eric. The only glove puppet ever to be interviewed for Face magazine.

In the year that Rod Hull fell off his roof trying to fix his TV aerial, find out how the world’s breakout pop culture star was another, slightly smaller, animal with a bloke’s hand up its arse.

See the ad for yourself on our Youtube channel at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSa4r3IYZlM and please do get in touch at steve@welcometoepic.com if you have questions or you’d like to suggest an ad for us to review.

In the meantime, subscribe, give us a like, look for us on Twitter and be kind to one another.

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John Lewis Christmas ads were ‘event’ advertising when things like that mattered. Now the world’s fucked do we care and are advertising agencies and their department store clients really best placed to raise national morale?

If this ad tells us anything it's that there’s a corner of the internet that's really disappointed there's no 222 to Tooting, pigeons are really ugly birds and attempting to fix a pair of specs with the label off an apple is futile. FUTILE I TELL YOU!

Listen with kindness in your heart and watch the ad at…https://youtu.be/x_3zBeQZKbg

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Join us as we review an ad for a fizzy drink that doesn’t feature a comedian, an American jazz singer, an ex-professional footballer and an overweight orange bloke.

Instead, prepare to be seduced by a commercial so compelling that Tony loses control of his bowels after discussing its role in post-modern British advertising.

A beautiful, heart-breaking, absolutely barking piece of work that will demonstrate the power of fizzy drink passion, as a man in a homemade gimp suit is reunited with the love of his life after his wife pops out to run some messages.

In the year that Ivy Tilsley’s face melted, your inhibitions will melt away too as we review an ad for Apple Tango that first aired in 1994.

Here's a link to the ad that we don't actually review but talk about (a lot)...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqVFnxHWnlc

And here's the link to the ad that we do review (and talk about a lot)... https://youtu.be/yuS0VsB74No

Get in touch if you’d like to suggest an ad for us to review and keep being kind to one another.

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Join us as Tony waxes lyrical about the mark 2 Ford Transit, Margaret Thatcher starts a small war, Steve explains how his family was poor but unhappy and we review a Birds Eye ad for steakhouse grills.

In a commercial where the stakes are high and the steaks are made of lamb, Birds Eye keeps the Advertising Standards Authority off its back by mentioning chips eleven times so that everyone think it’s a Mcains ad. For chips. Not steak. Made of lamb. Nothing to see here.

Treat yourself. You're going to love it.

See the ad for yourself on our Youtube channel at https://youtu.be/beXtsqhwj70 and get in touch if you’d like to suggest an ad for us to review.

In the meantime remember…be kind to one another, subscribe and leave us a review if you can be arsed.

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Join us as fourth-rate advertising industry suit Steve Cooke and first-rate advertising creative director and TV commercial director Tony Williams (no – not that one, the other one) review The Man Your Man Could Be, a TV ad for Old Spice.

Women want him. Men want to smell like him. He's the man your man could smell like if he didn't use lady-scented body wash...it won at Cannes but did it win our hearts as it that launched one of the most spectacularly successful rebrands in recent advertising history?

See the ad for yourself on our Youtube channel at https://youtu.be/LQjDCD2n0MY

Get in touch if you’d like to suggest an ad for us to review and in the meantime remember…be kind to one another.

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We’ll find out why Norman Lumsden never had to slum it again with bits parts in dodgy 80s telly shows after appearing in this commercial, and there’s more than a chance that we’ll question the premise of an ad featuring an author who - having written a book that sold 130,000 hardback copies - didn’t have one lying around at home.

All this and David Abbot chucks one (allegedly), Bob Brookes enhances his reputation (allegedly) and Deidre Barlow leaves Mike Baldwin to return to wishy-washy Coronation Street intellectual Ken Barlow (you heard it here second).

Join us as fourth -rate advertising industry suit Steve Cooke and first-rate advertising creative director and TV commercial director Tony Williams (no – not that one, the other one) review Fly Fishing by J.R.Hartley, a TV commercial for Yellow Pages that first aired in 1983.

See the ad on our Youtube channel here https://youtu.be/FRVdZizqzPg

Drop us a line if you’d like to suggest an ad for us to review and in the meantime remember…be kind to one another.

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Buckle up and join us as we review the legendary Ferrero Rocher TV ad, The Ambassador's Party, an irony-free effort from 1993 starring Colonel Dietrich and a bunch of random Euros all trying to pick hazelnut chocolate from between their teeth at what sounds like a football match.

We'd put money on this being the catalyst for Nigel Farage's Brexit fever dreams.

See the ad in all it's glory here...https://youtu.be/tKWVllNHH4k

Contact us if you'd like and maybe suggest an ad you'd like to hear reviewed and in the meantime...be kind to each other.

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