This episode of Someone Dies In This Elevator is rated PG-13. Great and Fair contains depictions of confinement, poisoning, and family trauma, and mentions of violence, war, miscarriage, misogyny, homophobia, colonialism, epidemic diseases, and religious discrimination. There is loud machinery, buzzing, and death in an elevator.

Great and Fair was written, directed, sound designed and scored by Lou Sutcliffe, with script editing by Motzie Dapul and using sound effects from freesound.org. “Fiona” was Erika Sanderson. “Moira” was Fay Roberts. And the Concierge was CL Hendry. Executive production and show art by Tal Minear. SFX credits are found at the end of the show notes: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/cytochrome-hear-presents/great-and-fair/

Originally distributed on Someone Dies in this Elevator: https://pod.link/1560057600

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We tell in verse the tale of noble knight

Who seeks her lost and ill-reputed love

And faces friends and perils on the way.

Queue up your podcatcher if catch you can

This story ours: The Rime of Gwenlian

[Content warnings for this episode include Violence, Sword fighting, demonic voices, mysogynistic language]

Episode transcript

SFX & Music Attribution

The Rime of Gwenlian features the vocal talents of:

Lumi Oakes as the Herald

Audrey Martin as The Knight ( Bsky ) 

Fay Roberts as The Lady of the Lake

Claire Dinnebier as the Owl and the Fox

Jae-in Hwan as the Hare and the Hedgehog

Lou Sutcliffe as the Dragon ( Tumblr | Bsky )

This pilot episode was created for Podcast Bookclub’s 2025 Podcastjam

Written by Audrey Martin, Lou Sutcliffe and Fay Roberts.

Sound designed and mixed by Jae-in Hwan with help by Lou Sutcliffe.

The cover design was created by Claire Dinnebier.

A special thanks to the Podcast Bookclub team for their hard work creating and managing this event.

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0:00-0:57: Main theme

0:57-2:35: Monsieur Cossey's Theme (Oli)

2:35-3:46: Gonzalez in the Air

3:46-4:36: Impending Doom

4:36-6:50: The English Pirates Attack

6:50-8:32: The Guanche

8:32-11:11: The Luminiferous Aether

11:11-12:46: Moon Forest

12:46-15:42: Travel by Fan

15:42-16:38: Moon theme

16:38-19:18: Moonsong

19:18-21:24: Return to Earth (Oli)

21:24-22:06: Landfall in China

22:06-22:47: The Mandarin's Palace

22:47-24:07: Mi Casa

For more information: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/cytochrome-hear-presents/the-man-in-the-moone/

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Contains spoilers for The Man in the Moone

Content warnings: 

Swearing (modern and period-typical), references to: colonialism, sex, death of animals, voyeurism, eugenics, snuff,

Transcripts at: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/cytochrome-hear-presents/the-man-in-the-moone/

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The Lecturer: Lou Sutcliffe

Domingo Gonzales (English): Oliver Morris

The Chinese Villagers: Michelle Kan

Content warnings: Colonialism, Orientalism, References to/Mentions of Christianity, Famine, Drought, Starvation, Death penalty, Animal death, Death/dying (including children), Roman Catholic proselytization in China,

Transcripts at: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/cytochrome-hear-presents/the-man-in-the-moone/

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The Lecturer: Lou Sutcliffe

Domingo Gonzales: Oliver Morris

Content warnings: Sea battle and cannon fire (SFX), Violence, Death/dying (violent), Shipwreck and drowning, Colonialism, References to genocides and colonial violence against indigenous peoples, Hallucinations, Demonic voices, Fungal disease, Insects, Mild swearing, 

Transcripts at: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/cytochrome-hear-presents/the-man-in-the-moone/

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The Lecturer: Lou Sutcliffe

Domingo Gonzales (English): Oliver Morris

Domingo Gonzales (Spanish): Diego Herrera

Content warnings: Sword fighting, Battle and pistol/rifle fire (SFX), Death/dying (violent) Animal death, Colonialism, References to genocides and colonial violence against indigenous peoples, Ecological damage and introduction of invasive species

Transcripts at: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/cytochrome-hear-presents/the-man-in-the-moone/

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Content warnings: period-typical anti-semitism, classism, disablism, sexism, whorephobia, and deeply unethical medical experimentation.

"The Man of the Crowd" and "The Facts in the Case of M. Valdemar" written by Edgar Allan Poe and narrated, edited and scored by Lou Sutcliffe.

Transcript at: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/a-little-poe-for-halloween/

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00:00 - 00:48 Main Theme Tune - Pipe Organ, Tabla, Piano, Pizzicato Strings, Tremolo violin

0:48 - 01:02 Pizzicato Strings

01:02 - 01:44 Dark Piano Theme (Warehouse) - Piano, Pizzicato Strings, Electronic sounds

01:45 - 02:58 Colonel Moran's Theme - Tabla, Sitar, Flute - Combination of North Indian instruments and colonial military airs.

02:59 - 03:26 Mr Alucard's Theme - Strings, Piano, Brass, Timpani, Cello, Muted Trumpet - Based on Romanian folk music.

03:27 - 04:55 Elspeth's Party Theme - Pizzicato and bowed strings - Parlour music, based on songs sung by ladies in the 19th century.

https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/td-additional-missives-theme-medley/

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Content warnings: 

Swearing. Lots of it

References to: Colonialism, Epidemic disease, Firearms

https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/td-additional-missives-bloopers/

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Content warnings: 

Swearing

References to: stereotyping of Irish regions, classism, colonialism

https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/td-additional-missives-nialls-irish-accent-tour/

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please find enclosed extremely confidential details of our plan to prevent Mr Alucard from doing any further harm... "

The Tiger and the Dragon is a Cytochrome Hear production by Lou Sutcliffe, distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International Licence. It featured Jennifer Noirot as Anna Moran, Lou Sutcliffe as Sebastian Moran, Niall Éanna Ó Domhnail as David Moran and J. M., Jonathan Kidger as John Seward, Bethan Lloyd-Wiggins as Elspeth and Floris "Swiftly" Bordewijk as Abraham van Helsing. Editing, soundscaping and score was by Lou Sutcliffe, with additional mastering editing by Jem Hawes. This episode used sounds from freesound.org. 

Content warnings: Colonialism, Period typical (19th Century) sexism, racism, bigotry, disablism, Death/dying (children, women in childbirth), The occult, Coercive control and manipulation

Firearms. References to: Crime, epidemic disease. SFX: Roaring animals, music, gun cocking, rustling paper, static, telegraph beeping.

For transcripts and show notes see: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/episode-5/

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please find enclosed the conclusion of Colonel Moran's account - a battle between monsters in the high passes of the Hindu Kush.. "

The Tiger and the Dragon is a Cytochrome Hear production by Lou Sutcliffe, distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International Licence. It featured Jennifer Noirot as Anna Seward, Lou Sutcliffe as Sebastian Moran, Bethan Lloyd-Wiggins as Elspeth, Jonathan Kidger as John Seward, Henry Prestige as Sherlock Holmes and Paul McDonough as Mr Alucard. Editing, soundscaping and score was by Lou Sutcliffe, with additional mastering editing by Jem Hawes. This episode used sounds from freesound.org. 

Content warnings:  Colonialism, Period typical (19th Century) sexism, racism, bigotry, disablism, Period typical slurs and swearing, Anti-muslim bigotry/Islamophobia, Death/dying, The occult, Crime, Firearms, Violence, References to: Incarceration, murder, SFX: Animals roaring, music, crowd noises, wind, fire crackling, voice effects, gunshots and gun cocking, bats, sword drawing. 

For transcripts and show notes see: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/episode-4/

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please find enclosed further details from Colonel Moran regarding his adventure to Afghanistan with Mr Alucard. "

The Tiger and the Dragon is a Cytochrome Hear production by Lou Sutcliffe, distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International Licence. It featured Jennifer Noirot as Anna Seward and Lou Sutcliffe as Sebastian Moran. Editing, soundscaping and score was by Lou Sutcliffe, with additional mastering editing by Jem Hawes. This episode used sounds from freesound.org. 

Content warnings: Colonialism, Period typical (19th Century) sexism, racism, bigotry, disablism, antiziganism, Period typical slurs and swearing, Death/dying, The occult, Crime, Firearms, Violence. References to: Incarceration, epidemic disease. SFX: Roaring animals, music, chattering voices, wind, sheep, screaming, gunfire.

For transcripts and show notes see: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/episode-3/

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Please find enclosed the promised epistle regarding a curious gentleman I met at my friend's party, one Colonel Sebastian Moran...... "

The Tiger and the Dragon is a Cytochrome Hear production by Lou Sutcliffe, distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution Non-commercial 4.0 International Licence. It featured Jennifer Noirot as Anna Seward and Lou Sutcliffe as Sebastian Moran. Editing, soundscaping and score was by Lou Sutcliffe, with additional mastering editing by Jem Hawes. This episode used sounds from freesound.org. 

Content warnings: Colonialism, Period typical (19th Century) sexism, racism, bigotry, disablism, Period typical slurs and swearing, Death/dying, The occult, Crime, Firearms, Smoking,

References to: Incarceration, Murder, SFX: Roaring animals, static, music, striking match/smoking.

For transcripts and show notes see: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/episode-1/

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Please find enclosed the promised epistle regarding Dr van Helsing and the strange incident with the scalpel at the seance... "

The Tiger and the Dragon is a Cytochrome Hear production by Lou Sutcliffe, distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International Licence. It featured Niall Éanna Ó Domhnaill as David Moran, Jennifer Noirot as Anna Seward, Jonathan Kidger as John Seward and Paul McDonough as Mr Alucard. Editing, soundscaping and score was by Lou Sutcliffe, with additional mastering editing by Jem Hawes. This episode used sounds from freesound.org.

Content warnings: Colonialism, Period typical (19th Century) sexism, racism, bigotry, disablism, Death/dying, The occult. References to: Violence against women, Violence against unborn children, Suicide (footnotes) SFX: Roaring animals, static, music.

For transcripts and show notes see: https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/episode-1/

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See https://cytochromehear.wordpress.com/home/tigeranddragon/ for more information.

Content warning: The Tiger and the Dragon is a 19th century horror pastiche audiodrama. It will contain references to colonialism, crime, firearms, the occult and period-typical racism, misogyny and disablism. It will not contain any themes of sexual assault but will contain violence including mentions of violence against women and unborn children. 

Featuring: Jennifer Noirot as Anna Seward, Lou Sutcliffe as Colonel Sebastian Moran, Floris Bordewijk as Abraham Van Helsing, Jonathan Kidger as Dr John Seward and Paul McDonough as Mr Alucard. Editing by Lou Sutcliffe, with mastering editing by Jem Hawes.

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