The Offensive

Introducing... BOOM Season Two | Out now

Mon, 10 Jul 2023 15:00:41 GMT

The creators of The Offensive are back with Season Two of their groundbreaking audio drama, BOOM.

The first two episodes are out now, with new episodes released every Monday.

Search 'BOOM' in your podcast app and subscribe. And if you want to get the whole series straightaway, for the first time ever you can purchase all six episodes ad-free for £6.99 with Acast+ here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Bonus: Episode 189 - Thanks for Listening

Mon, 29 May 2023 04:30:41 GMT

Behind the scenes for The Offensive finale.

patreon.com/ashwoodcity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 188 - The Final Finale: Part 2

Mon, 29 May 2023 04:00:53 GMT

The fate of the club and its staff hang in the balance as 5 years of mismanagement and greed come home to roost.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Matthew Malthouse as Tom Beattie

Additional Voices:

Natalie Green

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.

Listener discretion is advised. The Offensive is property of Holy Smokes Media Ltd.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 187 - The Final Finale: Part 1

Mon, 22 May 2023 04:00:27 GMT

Having been relegated from the Premier League, the season's proceedings come to a close. Including an outstanding Court of Appeal appearance for Sir Patrick Nolan and Ashwood City FC.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Matthew Malthouse as Tom Beattie

Additional Voices:

Harry Attwell

Lauren Ingram

Karim Kronfli

George Still

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 186 - Full Time

Mon, 15 May 2023 04:00:49 GMT

Matchday 38 and just 90 minutes of football remain in the 2022/23 Premier League season as Ashwood City throw everything at survival.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

As themselves:

Peter Drury

Gary Lineker

Alan Shearer

Micah Richards

Jules Breach

Kate Mason

Danny Jamieson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Holy Smokes Media Ltd.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 185 - Everton v Ashwood City

Mon, 08 May 2023 04:00:30 GMT

It's Matchday 37 in the Premier League and we join Peter Reynolds and Billy Richards for Everton v Ashwood City at Goodison Park.

Voices by: Joel Emery

Episode written by: Joel Emery

Executive Producer: Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised. The Offensive is property of Holy Smokes Media Ltd.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 184 - Council Culture

Mon, 01 May 2023 04:00:13 GMT

Off the back of a 4-0 defeat to Manchester United, Ashwood City need a result on the pitch. Meanwhile, a decision by a local magistrate gives them a result off the pitch.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Matthew Malthouse as Tom Beattie

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Thomas Mitchells

Jemma Revell

Lauren Hall

Adam Jarrell

Michael Lyons

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Holy Smokes Media Ltd.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 183 - Hove is where the Heart is

Mon, 24 Apr 2023 04:00:00 GMT

As the financial cuts deepen, Ashwood City are barely keeping the league form together at the most important stage of the season. Chief-Executive Jess Tate and Chairman Sir Patrick Nolan finally discuss the fallout from administration.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Matthew Malthouse as Tom Beattie

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Holy Smokes Media Ltd.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 182 - All The Manager's Men

Mon, 17 Apr 2023 04:00:22 GMT

In the grips of a brutal CVA, further cuts are made and this time the coaching staff are targeted. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall looks to offer a beleaguered Dan Watson all the help he can during a wobble in form as Patrick Nolan continues to distance himself from the crisis.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Matthew Malthouse as Tom Beattie

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Holy Smokes Media Ltd.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 181 - Risen from the Zoom

Mon, 10 Apr 2023 04:00:36 GMT

Ashwood City travel to The Emirates Stadium on Easter Weekend. Club Chairman Sir Patrick Nolan informs Chris 'Woody' Woodall and Colin Walsh of his Zoom meeting with the local council. Meanwhile, Administrator Tom Beattie has completed his dreaded 'Black Folder'.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Matthew Malthouse as Tom Beattie

Natalie Green as Elaine Wright

Chirstopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Additional Voices:

Adam Jarrell

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 180 - Uncivil War

Mon, 03 Apr 2023 04:00:08 GMT

Ashwood City clash with the local council over who's to blame for the collapse of the iBET stand. Meanwhile, Club Chairman Sir Patrick Nolan makes a momentous call on the club's future.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Matthew Malthouse as Tom Beattie

Darcey Ferguson as Leanne Potter

Natalie Green as Elaine Wright

Additional Voices:

Adam Jarrell

Joel Emery

Vanessa Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 179 - The Stand Before Time

Mon, 20 Mar 2023 05:00:59 GMT

Ashwood City Football Club are hit by the news that the fabled iBET Stand has collapsed. The club hierarchy and local council clash over who's to blame.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Additional Voices:

Thomas Mitchells

Natalie Green

Nalan Burgess

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 178 - Stranger than Fantasy

Mon, 13 Mar 2023 05:00:21 GMT

As the football world reacts to the BBC's treatment of Gary Lineker, Ashwood City have a social media issue of their own

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Luke Stevenson as Gareth McAskill

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 177 - The Great Escape

Mon, 06 Mar 2023 05:00:10 GMT

Stuck in traffic after the second leg of The Champions Fixture against PSG; Ashwood City Chief Executive Jess Tate questions Chairman Sir Patrick Nolan about rumours surrounding the future of the football club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised. The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 176 - Blind Tate

Mon, 27 Feb 2023 05:00:53 GMT

Ashwood City Chief Executive Jess Tate spends her 'day off' visiting both her doctor and an old acquaintance, who may know more about the future of the club than Jess does.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Lauren Ingram as Fiona Weed

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 175 - Nude Awakening

Mon, 20 Feb 2023 05:00:00 GMT

A day in the life of Ashwood City is interrupted by a protestor, who aims his fury at Club Chairman Sir Patrick Nolan.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 174 - Live and Let Liverpool

Mon, 13 Feb 2023 05:00:17 GMT

Liverpool FC are in town as Ashwood CIty play their first home game since the catastrophic transfer window.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 173 - London Calling

Mon, 06 Feb 2023 05:00:18 GMT

After a brutal transfer window, Sir Patrick Nolan heads to the City of London to seek new money from old friends.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Thomas Mitchells as Simon Napier-Fox

Adam Jarrell as Chris Well

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Nalan Burgess

Jennifer Tierney

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 172 - Deadline Day: Part 2

Mon, 30 Jan 2023 05:00:29 GMT

A seismic day in the history of Ashwood City Football Club has arrived as the severe financial crisis, internal disputes, player disharmony and firesale of key team members comes to a head on a tumultuous Deadline Day.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Additional voices by

Darcey Ferguson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Holy Smokes Media Ltd

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 171 - Deadline Day: Part 1

Mon, 23 Jan 2023 05:00:29 GMT

The departure of Brazilian striker Kevin brings about yet more protests at The Credit Master Stadium. Despite a decent run of form in the league, the Ashwood CIty hierarchy find themselves locked in the offices, for their own safety.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 170 - Woody's Roundup

Mon, 16 Jan 2023 05:00:36 GMT

Ashwood City Chief Executive Chris 'Woody' Woodall goes back to his roots on a scouting mission to recruit an up-and-coming player for the January transfer window.

All voices by Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 169 - Mixing Business with Pleasure (Beach)

Mon, 09 Jan 2023 05:00:44 GMT

Ashwood City take on SkyBet Championship side Blackpool in the Third Round of the FA Cup. Before the game, Chief Executive Chris 'Woody' Woodall takes Club Chairman Patrick Nolan to Blackpool Pleasure Beach.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 168 - Super Trooper

Mon, 02 Jan 2023 05:00:26 GMT

A new year, and a new beginning for Ashwood City, as the second Dan Watson era gets underway with a visit from fellow Premier League strugglers Everton.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Ant McGinley as David Hall

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 167 - The Christmas Special One V

Mon, 26 Dec 2022 05:00:00 GMT

Merry Christmas from all of us here at Ashwood City.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Ant McGinley as David Hall

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom / Chris Well

Jemma Moore as Danielle Broom

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Vanessa Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 166 - The Damned Re-United: Part 2

Mon, 14 Nov 2022 05:00:26 GMT

As the Premier League fixtures wrap up before the World Cup break, Ashwood City owner Patrick Nolan is still trying to secure the services of Mauricio Pochettino. Meanwhile, the players await their international call-ups, and the club bids farewell to Chief Player Liaison Officer, Theo Clinton.

The Offensive will return on Boxing Day 2022. For exclusive episodes between now and then – including a special World Cup bonus episode – subscribe to the Ashwood City Patreon for just $5 a month: www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Ant McGinley as David Hall

Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis Clark

Additional Voices:

Darcey Ferguson

Adam Jarrell

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 165 - The Damned Re-United: Part 1

Mon, 07 Nov 2022 05:00:14 GMT

The World Cup break approaches and Ashwood City desperately needs a new manager to take the reins during the much needed downtime. Chris 'Woody' Woodall and Colin Walsh get to work with their array of scouting talent, Patrick however is distracted by an old acquaintance.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 164 - Smit Happens

Mon, 31 Oct 2022 05:00:18 GMT

Unfortunate news regarding Head Coach Eric Van Smit forces the club to make a decision.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Allon Sylvain as Eric Van Smit

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 163 - Grand Pricks

Mon, 24 Oct 2022 06:12:37 GMT

Ashwood City Chairman Patrick Nolan M.B.E and Chief Executive Chris 'Woody' Woodall fly to Austin, Texas, to enjoy the US F1 Grand Prix. But the situation surrounding Club Doctor Rachel Webber provides an unwanted distraction from the day's events for Patrick Nolan.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 162 - Universally Challenged

Mon, 17 Oct 2022 04:00:50 GMT

During a dull Premier League fixture away to Chelsea, Ashwood CIty Chairman Patrick Nolan is offered a role within His Majesty's Government that could potentially allow him to gain the respect he so desperately desires.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Hugh Chambers

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 161 - Flaw and Order

Mon, 10 Oct 2022 04:00:48 GMT

Senior management at Ashwood City attend a pre-hearing for the legal clash with Arsenal Football Club, as the fallout from the final day of the 2021/22 season continues to engulf the club in financial and legal turmoil...

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Karim Kronfli as Judge Gastrell

Jennifer Tierney as Hannah Ingram

Harry Attwell as Robert Granger

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 160 - Name and Shame

Mon, 03 Oct 2022 04:00:45 GMT

For the first time in its history, the Ashwood City Stadium has changed its name courtesy of a new revenue stream secured by Chairman Patrick Nolan MBE. The fallout from this momentous chapter in the club's history is hostile, to say the least.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised. The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 159 - Lever Pitch: Part Two

Mon, 19 Sep 2022 04:00:14 GMT

It's the day of the funeral for Queen Elizabeth II. In a momentous occasion for both the club and country, an opportunistic Patrick Nolan decides to showcase Dartley Park to a potential buyer.

The Offensive will return after the International Break.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Thomas Mitchells as Simon Napier-Fox

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 158 - Lever Pitch: Part One

Mon, 12 Sep 2022 04:00:55 GMT

It's a momentous day in Ashwood City's history as they travel to the Nou Camp to take on Barcelona in the UEFA Champions League... The historic occasion is somewhat spoiled by a deepening financial crisis at the club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Darcey Ferguson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 157 - Toon Can Play At That Game

Mon, 05 Sep 2022 04:00:22 GMT

Ashwood City are the visitors at St James' Park in a must-win game for the Super Whites.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall & Kieran Broom

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 156 - Deadline Day

Mon, 29 Aug 2022 04:00:36 GMT

League form has never been worse, their Head Coach has finally been charged by the police and a multitude of other crises emerge... Ashwood City are feeling the heat as Deadline Day approaches.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Allon Sylvain as Eric Van Smit

Additional Voices:

Nalan Burgess

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 155 - A New Leaf

Mon, 22 Aug 2022 04:00:52 GMT

Ashwood City Chairman Patrick Nolan and CEO Chris 'Woody' Woodall enjoy the facilities of Broadley Country Club. All is not as it seems, however, as Patrick confides in his Chief Executive.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 154 - Apportunity Knocks

Mon, 15 Aug 2022 04:00:59 GMT

Ashwood staff are impressed with the delivery of a summer project by the new Ashwood City Chief Executive Officer. An envious Patrick Nolan sets out to undermine all the hard work done by Chris 'Woody' Woodall and the rest of the club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 153 - 2022/2023 SEASON: The Nolan Era

Mon, 08 Aug 2022 04:00:21 GMT

Premier League football returns as Ashwood City host Fulham at Dartley Park. Chairman Patrick Nolan M.B.E is eager to kick off the new era with a bang, whilst newly appointed C.E.O Chris 'Woody' Woodall concentrates on cleaning the mess left by Head Coach Eric Van Smit's antics at the end of last season.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Allon Sylvain as Eric Van Smit

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Kate Mason

Luke Moore

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Introducing... BOOM Season One | Out now

Mon, 27 Jun 2022 04:00:15 GMT

The makers of The Offensive are here to introduce you to their groundbreaking new drama, BOOM, starring Akie Kotabe, Sharon D. Clarke MBE and Omari Douglas.

This is Episode 1, just search ‘BOOM’ wherever you get your podcasts to get all six episodes of Season One now!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 152 - Finale: Part 2

Mon, 23 May 2022 04:00:51 GMT

Ashwood City are leading 2-1 in a game they simply must win. Yet with just 15 minutes remaining they've been caught on the break with no one back to cover...

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Ant McGinley as David Hall

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 151 - Finale: Part 1

Mon, 16 May 2022 04:00:13 GMT

Ashwood City head into their final game of the 2021/22 season: a home tie against relegation battlers Leeds United. With a win Ashwood City would seal Champions League qualification for the first time in a generation.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Ant McGinley as David Hall

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 150 - All Good Things Come To A Friend

Mon, 09 May 2022 06:08:12 GMT

Patrick Nolan MBE has secured full ownership of the club as Ashwood City thrash Norwich and set up a tantalising final pair of fixtures against Brighton and Leeds. The new takeover however has a final few tweaks to the personnel before completion.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Additional voices:

Nalan Burgess

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised. The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 149 - Bid Adieu

Mon, 02 May 2022 04:00:57 GMT

Anaheim Sports Group are finalising the sale of 55% of Ashwood City to Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan, making him the outright owner of the club. As well as Anaheim Sports Group, Manchester City are also in town as Ashwood look to remain in the race for Champions League qualification.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 148 - Manic Room

Mon, 25 Apr 2022 04:00:01 GMT

After a demoralising defeat to Everton at Goodison Park, the Ashwood City juggernaut has stalled... But the headlines are dominated by an offer from Patrick Nolan to purchase the rest of the club and the news has hit the fanbase hard.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 147 - Sun's Out, Funds Out

Mon, 18 Apr 2022 04:00:17 GMT

Chief Executive Patrick Nolan MBE is enjoying a well-earned break in the Seychelles. Little does he know that a seismic decision Stateside will cut his trip short.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 146 - Force Mature

Mon, 11 Apr 2022 06:12:19 GMT

Ashwood City have rediscovered their form at the right time in the season. Next up, fellow sanctioned Premier League side Chelsea FC.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised. The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 145 - Business As Unusual

Mon, 04 Apr 2022 04:00:05 GMT

Premier League football returns, as does a familiar face to Ashwood City Football Club...

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Introducing... Jackie the Ripper Season Two | Out Monday 28th March

Fri, 25 Mar 2022 05:00:12 GMT

From the creators of The Offensive. The chart-topping comedy drama retelling the Whitechapel murders returns for a second series.

Search ‘Jackie the Ripper’ wherever you get your podcasts to catch up on season one now and follow @JackieRipperPod on Twitter.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 144 - From Russia with Love

Mon, 21 Mar 2022 05:00:19 GMT

An unprecedented sanction has hit Ashwood City Football Club following the exposure of Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan's links to problematic Russian investment. With tight restrictions and panic setting in, Patrick must ensure he can get the UK government to ease the ruling.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 143 - Anger Management

Mon, 14 Mar 2022 05:00:01 GMT

A humbling 3-0 defeat at West Ham prompts Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall to review the game in the analysis room. Interim Head Coaches Chris Well, David Hall and the entire first team squad are in attendance for the match review.

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Ant McGinley as David Hall

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Adam Jarrell as Chris Well

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Episode written by: Joel Emery

Edited by: Adam Jarrell

Directed by: Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer: Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised. The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 142 - Deep Blue Sea

Mon, 07 Mar 2022 05:00:48 GMT

With global politics playing havoc with the stability of Ashwood City assets, Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan has his eye drawn to another Premier League club as Ashwood host Newcastle United at Dartley Park.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 141 - The Special One(s)

Mon, 28 Feb 2022 05:00:45 GMT

After a humbling defeat to Burnley at Turf Moor, filling the vacant managerial role has become an absolute priority for the club. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan, Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall, Head of Communications Jess Tate and Head of Football Operations Colin Walsh disperse amongst European cities to approach their managerial targets.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 140 - The Breakfast Club

Mon, 21 Feb 2022 05:00:47 GMT

In the early hours of the morning, Ashwood City Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall wakes to the news that club captain Kieran Broom has committed a public misdemeanour after being removed from a nightclub.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 139 - Fool's Gold

Mon, 14 Feb 2022 05:00:01 GMT

Chief Executive Patrick Nolan is working closely with Amazon Prime Video to ensure that the next season of 'All or Nothing' covers Ashwood City Football Club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Nalan Burgess as Nina Bradshaw

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 138 - The Wrong Man

Mon, 07 Feb 2022 05:00:30 GMT

A jaw dropping exit by Head Coach Sven Goran Eriksson in the closing stages of Deadline Day leaves Ashwood City in disarray. A long term managerial search is in the pipeline, but in the short term the club need to choose a man for the job.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Ant McGinley as David Hall

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 137 - Deadline Day: Part 2

Mon, 31 Jan 2022 05:00:48 GMT

Deadline day has arrived and Chief Executive Patrick Nolan is chasing the highly controversial offer from Real Madrid for star forward Kevin; much to the dismay of Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 136 - Deadline Day: Part 1

Mon, 24 Jan 2022 05:00:38 GMT

Ashwood City host a thrilling Premier League clash with Wolves as Head of Football Operations Colin Walsh and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall field unwanted interest in Kevin from a European super club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Joaquin Augusto Quinteros

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 135 - (AF)CON AIR

Mon, 17 Jan 2022 05:00:43 GMT

As matchweek two of AFCON begins, Ashwood City Chief Executive Patrick Nolan and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall fly out to Cameroon to ensure high profile talent Christian Akuffo is being taken care of.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 134 - The Christmas Special One IV

Mon, 20 Dec 2021 08:09:10 GMT

The Ashwood City hierarchy head to The Big Apple. Brazilian centre forward Kevin, however, is lost in New York.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jessica Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 133 - The Fairytale of New York

Mon, 13 Dec 2021 05:00:00 GMT

In the fallout from his recent public faux-pas, pressure is mounting on Ashwood City Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan as he attempts to evade the authorities. A visit to a local children's hospital, however, may have given him the inspiration he needs.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jessica Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 132 - Fools and Regulations

Mon, 06 Dec 2021 05:00:00 GMT

Amidst speculation of an incoming independent regulator, the Premier League summons its cohorts to launch a media offensive and counter the argument.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jessica Tate

Alex Marshall as Will Wright

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 131 - Live by the Fraud, Die by the Fraud

Mon, 29 Nov 2021 05:00:35 GMT

Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan has secured a massive sponsorship deal with a cryptocurrency marketplace that even involves an unprecedented £200m stadium naming-rights deal.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jessica Tate

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 130 - It's Reigning Sven

Mon, 22 Nov 2021 05:00:00 GMT

The Premier League returns and the international break has caused havoc with Ashwood City's playing staff. Head Coach Sven-Goran Eriksson is determined however to field an unchanged side as they travel to Manchester City... much to the fury of Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jessica Tate

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 129 - Soldier of Misfortune

Mon, 08 Nov 2021 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City take on Burnley at home in the final Dartley Park fixture before Remembrance Sunday. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan works closely with his communications team to ensure the memorial presentation is befitting of those who sacrificed their lives.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jessica Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices:

Thomas Mitchells

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 128 - I Still Know What You Did This Summer

Mon, 01 Nov 2021 05:00:00 GMT

To address the ongoing concerns over the legitimacy of the summer purchases; Chief Exectutive Patrick Nolan is heading out to ASG Headquarters in Los Angeles.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jessica Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Vanessa Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Making of The Offensive

Wed, 27 Oct 2021 04:00:00 GMT

To celebrate Acast's Audio Fiction Week, take a peek behind the curtain of Ashwood City with this special behind-the-scenes look at the making of episode 126 of The Offensive. Featuring creators Joel Emery and Adam Jarrell as well as Paul Waggott (Patrick Nolan) and Helena Doughty (Jess Tate).

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 127 - I Know What You Did This Summer

Mon, 25 Oct 2021 04:00:25 GMT

Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan has questions to answer from not only the Premier League but also the ownership of his own club. With the summer acquisitions under scrutiny; the race to clean up their act intensifies, as speculation over an independent regulator heightens.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 126 - Extreme Takeover

Mon, 18 Oct 2021 04:00:00 GMT

The elite members of the Premier League react with fury at the takeover of Newcastle United Football Club. As crisis talks begin between clubs and league, Ashwood City are unexpectedly asked along to attend the high level meeting.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 125 - Driving Miss Diesel

Mon, 04 Oct 2021 04:00:00 GMT

Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall join one another on the road for back-to-back Premier League away games at Leeds United and Watford.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 124 - See a Man About a Dog

Mon, 27 Sep 2021 04:00:00 GMT

As Ashwood City's form improves, Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall secures a new First Team Coach to work under Head Coach Sven-Goran Eriksson.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Ant McGinley as David Hall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 123 - Repo Man

Mon, 20 Sep 2021 04:00:00 GMT

The feel-good factor around the club is spilling over into the private life of Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan. Once besieged by abuse and torment, it would seem the fans have finally been appeased... Those popular new acquisitions however are coming at a costly price.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 122 - Fabtastic Beasts and Where To Find Them

Mon, 13 Sep 2021 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City arrive in Liverpool on the eve of their match with the 2020 PL Champions. With new signings Vassos, Luna and Kevin travelling in the matchday squad, expectations are high... But for Chief Player Liaison Officer Theo Clinton the matchweek is much more complicated.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 121 – Deadline Day: Part 2

Mon, 30 Aug 2021 04:00:00 GMT

The English transfer window is closing fast and Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is struggling under the pressure; during the once in a lifetime window for Ashwood City.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Amina Koroma as Dofi Akuffo

Additional Voices:

Joaquin Augusto Quinteros

Joel Emery

Episode written by: Joel Emery

Edited by: Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Directed by: Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer: Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 120 - Deadline Day: Part 1

Mon, 23 Aug 2021 04:00:01 GMT

The opportunity to improve the Ashwood City squad for the 2021/22 Premier League season is slipping away. An old ally of Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan offers an unlawful alternative to their transfer woes.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2021/22 SEASON: Window Shopping

Mon, 16 Aug 2021 04:00:00 GMT

The Premier League returns and the new power structure of Ashwood City has Patrick Nolan at the helm. Lack of activity in the transfer window has provoked a strong backlash from the fanbase, leading to widespread vandalism.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Christopher Swift as Reuben Thomas

Additional Voices:

Danny Jamieson

Jonny Blain

Erika Marchant

Ant McGinley

John Walker

Marcus Speller

Jim Campbell

Pete Donaldson

Natalie Green

Esmonde Cole

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 118 - Finale: Part 2

Mon, 24 May 2021 04:00:00 GMT

It's the final matchweek of the Premier League season and Ashwood City Chief Executive Patrick Nolan finds himself with a new level of power. The dramatic events of the week before have not been taken lightly by Anaheim Sports Group as Patrick takes to The University of Ashwood to reflect on his recent endeavours.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Ramone Dale-Cruickshank as Harvey Simms

Adam Alexander as Adam Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Nalan Burgess

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 117 - Finale: Part 1

Mon, 17 May 2021 04:00:00 GMT

Wembley Stadium plays host to the FA Cup Final between Chelsea and Ashwood City. As kick-off looms, the historic purchase of 30% of the club on behalf of the Ashwood City Supporters' Trust comes to completion.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rhys Tees as Frank Finnan

Adam Alexander as Adam Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 116 - Game Over

Mon, 10 May 2021 04:00:00 GMT

With a new regime being installed at the club and an FA Cup final on the way, acting Chief-Executive Jess Tate continues to assist the transition.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rhys Tees as Frank Finnan

Luke Stevenson as Gareth McAskill

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 115 - The End of an Error

Mon, 03 May 2021 04:00:00 GMT

The hierarchy of Ashwood City is turned on its head as the Supporters Trust gain significant progress due to some help from an old friend.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Rhys Tees as Frank Finnan

Adam Alexander as Adam Tate

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Luke Stevenson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 114 - The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen

Mon, 26 Apr 2021 04:00:00 GMT

Off the back of a huge FA Cup Semi-Final appearance for Ashwood City; European football is thrown into chaos as The Super League announce their arrival on the world stage.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Rhys Tees as Frank Finnan

Adam Alexander as Adam Tate

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Nalan Burgess

Luke Stevenson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 113 - The Fans Doth Protest Too Much

Mon, 19 Apr 2021 04:00:00 GMT

Wembley Stadium plays host to Leicester City v Ashwood City in the FA Cup Semi-Final. A government approved test event has allocated seats for 4,000 supporters inside the 90,000 seater.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Rhys Tees as Frank Finnan

Kelly Somers as Herself

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 112 - Simms City: Part 2

Mon, 12 Apr 2021 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is losing his grip on his position at the club as Anaheim Sports Group have accepted the offer from Harvey Simms. With the deal underway, all Patrick has to work with is a name... 'Bohai'.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Ramone Dale-Cruickshank as Harvey Simms

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Esmonde Cole as KFC

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 111 - Simms City: Part 1

Mon, 05 Apr 2021 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City face Manchester City in matchweek 30 of the Premier League. As the domestic season looks to be a fairly quiet one on the pitch for the Kent side; off the pitch the bidding process is in disarray as Harvey Simms and the Ashwood City Supporters' Trust turn up the pressure on Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Rhys Tees as Frank Finnan

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

Music featured: 'Gravitated' by Edgar Hopp

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 110 - The Ground of Music

Mon, 22 Mar 2021 05:00:54 GMT

Ashwood City Chief Executive Patrick Nolan, Head of Communications Jess Tate and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall enlist the help of the Ashwood City faithful to try and lift morale and improve the club's dreadful home form. Meanwhile, The Ashwood City Supporters' Trust gains momentum.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Additional Voices:

Jennifer Tierney

Joel Emery

Rhys Tees

Adam Alexander

Episode written by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 109 - Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged

Mon, 15 Mar 2021 05:00:00 GMT

The long-awaited tribunal finally sees Kyle Francis-Clarke and The Professional Footballers' Association take on Chris 'Woody' Woodall and Colin Walsh of Ashwood City Football Club.

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Jennifer Tierney as Hannah Ingram QC

Esmonde Cole as KFC

Thomas Mitchells as Judge Philip Gray

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 108 - His Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Mon, 08 Mar 2021 05:00:00 GMT

Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan's fantasy football team is suffering following his failure to pick up on insider knowledge from Ashwood City. His resolve is tested further as Head of Football Operations Colin Walsh uncovers the legal threat posed by the impending litigation from injured forward Kyle Francis-Clarke.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Esmonde Cole as KFC

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Danny Jamieson

Nalan Burgess

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 107 - Fight Club

Mon, 01 Mar 2021 05:00:00 GMT

A brawl amongst the playing and coaching staff of Ashwood City and Tottenham Hotspur takes place post-match at the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is desperate not only to partake in the Skywalk with Daniel Levy but also to take centre stage in diffusing the tension.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Ramone Dale-Cruickshank as Harvey Simms

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 106 - Zoom For Improvement

Mon, 22 Feb 2021 05:00:00 GMT

Coronavirus has struck down the Ashwood City hierarchy as Patrick Nolan, Jess Tate, Alex Morrison and Chris 'Woody' Woodall are all forced into isolation. As the PFA case of Kyle Francis-Clarke begins, Patrick takes on local small businesses and Harvey Simms... all while battling severe COVID symptoms.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional voices by

Rachel Teate

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 105 - Problem Child

Mon, 15 Feb 2021 05:00:00 GMT

A dramatic 1-0 victory over Arsenal at Dartley Park has sparked outrage among the football community as the use of a ballboy - prohibited under COVID-19 protocol - was instrumental in the winning goal. To add to Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan's woes; Dr. Rachel Webber is taking action against the medical impropriety and mishandling of injured star KFC by Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall and Head of Football Operations Colin Walsh.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Additional voices by:

Luke Stevenson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 104 - Foul Play

Mon, 08 Feb 2021 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City are in midweek Premier League action against Manchester United. Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan however is at the whim of owners Anaheim Sports Group and is tasked with hosting prospective buyer and potential successor Harvey Simms. With the Sky Sports' cameras awaiting the big game and a glimpse of Harvey; Patrick has a plan...

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Ramône Dale-Cruickshank as Harvey Simms

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices by

Jonny Blain

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 103 - Deadline Day: Part 2

Mon, 01 Feb 2021 09:42:01 GMT

On the final day of the January Transfer Window news comes to light that recent signing Kelvin Reid has had intimate relations with the wife of club veteran; Marco Nipic.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Ray Strasser-King as Kelvin Reid

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Alberto Iriarte as Beñat 'Benny' Bengoetxea

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 102 - Deadline Day: Part 1

Mon, 25 Jan 2021 07:49:09 GMT

Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan and Head of Communications Jess Tate require negative COVID-19 test results ahead of Deadline Day at Ashwood City Football Club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Additional Voices:

Rachel Teate

Thomas Mitchells

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Episode directed by:

Helena Doughty & Paul Waggott

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 101 - Who Swears Wins

Mon, 18 Jan 2021 05:00:00 GMT

The new regime under Sven-Göran Eriksson has provided a much needed impetus for Ashwood City Football Club. The turn of fortunes even reflects onto the Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan as he secures a rare appearance on a dedicated Ashwood supporters' podcast feed.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Sven-Goran Eriksson as Himself

Alberto Iriarte as Beñat 'Benny' Bengoetxea

Additional Voices:

Nalan Burgess

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 100 - The Christmas Special One III

Mon, 21 Dec 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City Football Club look to complete the signing of Sven-Goran Eriksson as Head Coach.

In Loving Memory of beautiful Lucinda.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 099 - Big Man On Campus

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 05:00:00 GMT

The Tottenham victory seals Ashwood City's 4-straight league win under Interim Head Coach Matt Jansen. Former player and businessman, now turned Ashwood City agitator; Harvey Simms has enacted shareholder protocol to demand a meeting between Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan and the highly regarded Jansen... Meanwhile in Scandinavia; Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall attempts to recruit his successor.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Ramone Dale-Cruickshank as Harvey Simms

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 098 - Gone With The Wind

Mon, 07 Dec 2020 05:00:00 GMT

On a fiercely windy day in Kent, Ashwood City host Tottenham Hotspur after a run of 3-straight victories under Interim Head Coach Matt Jansen. With Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan and Head of Communications Jess Tate in attendance; Croatian defender Dario Babic suffers a dangerous injury on the field.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Adam Jarrell

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 097 - The Ashwoodian Candidate

Mon, 30 Nov 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Chief Player Liaison Officer Theo Clinton has unexpectedly been exposed as the individual behind the Ashwood City email hacks. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan looks to resolve, understand and ultimately exploit his motives.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Rachel Teate as Dame Georgina Pitt

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Nalan Burgess

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 096 - The Imitation Game

Mon, 23 Nov 2020 05:00:00 GMT

The international break has concluded and Premier League action returns. Ashwood City travel to Newcastle United as Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is looking to recover from a difficult couple of weeks following his disastrous appearance in Prague...

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 095 - And The Winner Is...

Mon, 09 Nov 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is under intense pressure as a potential rival has emerged for the much coveted 30% ownership of Ashwood City Football Club. His frustrations and ego are relieved however, with the news of a career achievement recognition from the footballing community.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Ramone Dale-Cruickshank as Harvey Simms

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rachel Teate as Dame Georgina Pitt

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 094 - Patrick or Treat

Mon, 02 Nov 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Following an away defeat to Wolverhampton Wanderers, Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall finds himself as an unwilling chauffeur to Head of Communications Jess Tate, as they make their way to the Ashwood City Halloween Party.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Rachel Teate as Dame Georgina Pitt

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 093 - Dirty Deeds

Mon, 26 Oct 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City take on Leeds United in the first league meeting between the two since 2004. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan has had to make slight adjustments to Dartley Park, in order to welcome the Premier League newcomers.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices

Joel Emery

Lynnette Shaw

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 092 - Demolition Man

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Fresh from the International Break as well as the possibility of 'Project Big Picture', Patrick Nolan embarks on his own project as he attempts to put the final nail in the coffin of the Ashwood City Youth Academy, albeit with a little help from some friends in low places.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 091 - The Aristotwats

Mon, 05 Oct 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Following the decision to publish false positive COVID-19 test results for Kieran Broom and Kyle Francis-Clarke ahead of England duty; Chief Executive Patrick Nolan is now dealing with the fallout. Determined to get his fixture pile-up resolved, Patrick reaches out to an old ally of the club in an effort to force the hand of the football powers-that-be.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rachel Teate as Dame Georgina Pitt

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 090 - Forget Me Yacht

Mon, 28 Sep 2020 04:00:00 GMT

For matchweek three of the Premier League; Ashwood City take their perfect record to Craven Cottage. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall and Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan, however, have other social commitments.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 089 - Whistle While You Work

Mon, 21 Sep 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Following a bright start to the league campaign, Ashwood City now face Portsmouth in the second round of the Carabao Cup. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall is charged with the task of securing an ambitious feeder club for Ashwood City. Patrick and Jess however are distracted by the latest new recruit...

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Additional Voices

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2020/21 SEASON: House of Cards

Mon, 14 Sep 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Premier League football returns as Ashwood City take on Crystal Palace in Matchweek 1 of the new season. With COVID-19 restrictions in place; Dartley Park remains closed to the fans. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan's endeavours to increase matchday revenue for the club lead him to a fan engagement initiative using cardboard cutout selfies to attend the fixture.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

John Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Rachel Teate as Karen

Lucinda Shaw as Christine Williams

Matt Jansen as himself

Additional Voices

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

With thanks to:

The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders

www.patreon.com/ashwoodcity

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 087 - A Star Is Torn

Mon, 17 Aug 2020 04:00:00 GMT

It's the Semi-Final of the Europa League. Ashwood City take on FC Internazionale as the isolated tournament in Germany moves ever-closer to its climax. Once again, however, the mood in the camp is delicately poised to see the loan saga of Christian Akuffo resolved.

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis Clark

Acushla-Tara Cupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Isi Adeola as Christian Akuffo

David Letemple Leroy as Antoine

Additional voices

Joel Emery

Casting Director:

Kirsty Gillmore

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 086 - Bring Him Home

Mon, 10 Aug 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood's first leg in the round of 16 ended 1-0 to Ashwood in Wolfsburg back in March. Now, along with fellow UEFA Europa League competitors, they find themselves vying for a place in the Quarter Final held in Germany under strict quarantine conditions.

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis-Clarke

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 085 - Finale: Part 2

Mon, 08 Jun 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Premier League survival hangs in the balance as Ashwood City take on Manchester United in the final game of the season.

The Offensive will return at the start of the 2020/2021 season. Thank you for your continued support. Visit ashwoodcity.com and patreon.com/ashwoodcity for more.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis-Clarke

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Peter Drury as Himself

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Ant McGinley

Owen Maers

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

"Gravitated" by Edgar Hopp

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 084 - Finale: Part 1

Mon, 01 Jun 2020 04:00:00 GMT

It's the final week of the season, and the battle for Premier League survival hits boiling point as Ashwood City travel to Villa Park. Can The Superwhites continue their run of good form under Interim Head Coach Matt Jansen in their penultimate game of the season?

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

Additional Voices:

Jo Price

Joel Emery

Lucinda Shaw

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 083 - Me, Myself and Fly

Mon, 25 May 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City travel to Goodison Park to take on Everton in one of the final games of the season. Off the pitch, however, things turn sour as Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall is forced to vacate his seat, due to the ongoing issues with Rob Jefferson.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 082 - Kyle and Error

Mon, 18 May 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City take on Tottenham Hotspur under new Interim Head Coach Matt Jansen. Meanwhile, Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall explore their options for life in The Championship without in-form prospect Kyle Francis-Clarke.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Esmonde Cole as KFC

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 081 - Fever Pitch

Mon, 11 May 2020 04:00:00 GMT

The first match of the season in the post-Van Smit era sees fellow Premier League strugglers West Ham United visit Dartley Park. Will the 'New Manager Bounce' materialise and allow Ashwood City to gain three valuable points?

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Rhys Tees as Rob Jefferson

Lucinda Shaw as Christine Williams

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

Matt Jansen as Himself

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 080 - Afscheid, Eric

Mon, 04 May 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Following an away defeat to Brighton and Hove Albion, the Ashwood hierarchy put the wheels into motion to try and turn the club's fortunes around. Negotiations with former coach Dan Watson however, hit a bit of a roadblock in the form of new representation for the fan-favourite.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Allon Sylvain as Eric Van Smit

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Rhys Tees as Rob Jefferson

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 079 - I'd Do Anything

Mon, 27 Apr 2020 04:00:00 GMT

As the deal to bring home 'The Prodigal Son' Dan Watson edges closer, Patrick Nolan is A.W.O.L from the club offices. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall leads the chase to find the missing Chief Executive.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Lucinda Shaw as Christine Williams

Allon Sylvain as Eric Van Smit

Lucy-Jane Quinlan as Grace Roberts-Dean

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 078 - Planes, Trains and Automobiles

Mon, 20 Apr 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood take on Manchester City at the Etihad Stadium, with an already irritated Patrick Nolan arranging the travel to the game for his fellow board-members; Head of Communications Jess Tate and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Nalan Burgess

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 077 - The Resurrection

Sun, 12 Apr 2020 16:00:00 GMT

The Premier League has returned, as Ashwood City host Arsenal.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Allon Sylvain as Eric Van Smit

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

With thanks to

Jon Champion

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 076 - The Game is Afoot

Mon, 06 Apr 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Something is stirring in the night...

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional voices

Lucinda Shaw

Joel Emery

With thanks to

Jon Champion

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 075 - Rebel Without a Clause

Mon, 30 Mar 2020 04:00:00 GMT

In a time of unprecedented government support for businesses, Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan has taken the opportunity to make the most of the tax-payer funded assistance.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Lucinda Shaw as Christine Williams

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Additional voices

Luke Moore

Lynne Shaw

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 074 - Party Poopers

Mon, 23 Mar 2020 05:00:00 GMT

As a nationwide lockdown looms; Patrick, Woody and Jess make a final social outing in attending the birthday party of Arsenal Head Coach Mikel Arteta.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

With thanks to

The Price of Football Podcast

Kevin Day

Kieran Maguire

Guy Kilty

Directed by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 073 - A Goal For Africa

Mon, 16 Mar 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Football is at a standstill and in an effort to gain some positive online traction; Ashwood City have released a fundraising anthem during Sport Relief mistaking it for Red Nose Day. It's up to Jess Tate to handle the fallout from the controversial song.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional voices

Lucinda Shaw

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 072 - The Boy Who Cried Wolfsburg

Thu, 12 Mar 2020 21:00:00 GMT

Flying high off the back of a 1-0 win in Wolfsburg in the Europa League Round of 16; the Ashwood City players are taking measures to ensure they avoid being affected by the Coronavirus outbreak.

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Directed by:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 071 - Old Etonians Assemble!

Mon, 09 Mar 2020 05:00:00 GMT

As the authorities prepare their case against Patrick Nolan, old connections provide an opportunity to hinder the prosecution.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Rhys Tees as Rob Jefferson

Additional voices

Nalan Burgess

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 070 - Dangerous Liaisons

Mon, 02 Mar 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City set their sights on Norwich and all three points as 19th in the Premier League take on 20th at Carrow Road. Woody however has bumped into an old colleague that could turn the fortunes of the club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 069 - Broom With a View

Thu, 27 Feb 2020 21:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City are in Basel, Switzerland for the second leg of their Europa League Round of 32 tie. In addition to already trailing 1-0 on aggregate, the side now have to deal with club captain Kieran Broom walking out on the team prior to kick-off.

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional Voices:

Nalan Burgess

Joel Emery

Casting Director:

Kirsty Gillmore

Directed by:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 068 - Hold The Phone

Mon, 24 Feb 2020 05:00:00 GMT

UEFA have been in touch with Ashwood City to confirm the use of Patrick Nolan in the promotional media for their latest campaign. The Chief-Executive however... has a few tweaks.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Directed by:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 067 - Family Matters

Thu, 20 Feb 2020 21:00:00 GMT

The Europa League returns as Ashwood City face FC Basel at home in the first leg of the Round of 32 tie. Tensions from the previous week have got unresolved as Kieran and Christian's relationship deteriorates further causing Dwight Hayes to step in.

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Esmonde Cole as KFC

Isi Adeola as Christian Akuffo

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Casting Director:

Kirsty Gillmore

Directed by:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 066 - Training Day

Mon, 17 Feb 2020 05:00:00 GMT

With yet another Premier League defeat, this time at the hands of Leicester City, Ashwood find themselves in turmoil as on-the-field pressure breeds contempt on the training ground.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

Nalan Burgess as Natasha Harley

Additional voices

Thomas Mitchells

Casting Director:

Kirsty Gillmore

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 065 - Rest For The Wicked

Mon, 10 Feb 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City are without a fixture and in an effort to fully embrace the Premier League winter break, the ownership have taken the team and staff to Florida for an extensive training camp to save their season. Patrick on the other hand is working on his own brand to save not just his season, but his reputation.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Nalan Burgess as Natasha Harley

Additional voices

Vanessa Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 064 - Bourne Ultimatum

Mon, 03 Feb 2020 08:41:10 GMT

With the close of the transfer window, Ashwood City's attention returns to the Premier League and the visit of relegation rivals AFC Bournemouth. Patrick Nolan's attention, however, is focused on how to undo a personal faux pas.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Isi Adeola as Christian Akuffo

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Casting Director:

Kirsty Gillmore

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 063 - Deadline Day

Fri, 31 Jan 2020 05:00:54 GMT

Ashwood City are moments away from getting the Christian Akuffo deal over the line from Napoli. The new signing however has a difficult first demand upon his arrival at the club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

Isi Adeola as Christian Akuffo

Rhys Tees as Rob Jefferson

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Lucinda Shaw as Christine

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Casting Director:

Kirsty Gillmore

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 062 - An American Werewolf in Ashwood

Mon, 20 Jan 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Struggling Ashwood City have travelled to Molineux to face Wolverhampton Wanderers. Joining the Ashwood City hierarchy is Anaheim Sports Group's latest addition, Operations Director; Dwight Hayes.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional voices

Jonny Blain

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Casting Director:

Kirsty Gillmore

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 061 - Wayne's World

Mon, 13 Jan 2020 05:00:00 GMT

The Premier League returns after a brief FA Cup interlude. For Ashwood City preparations for the visit of Crystal Palace have been disrupted by the disgruntled 'Wayne'.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional voices

Lucinda Shaw

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 060 - Pat on a Hot Tin Roof

Mon, 06 Jan 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Following a brutal festive period in the league for Ashwood City, it's finally cause for celebration as Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is to receive an MBE. A celebratory party is arranged in a rare weekend without Premier League action.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 059 - The Christmas Special One II

Mon, 23 Dec 2019 07:31:07 GMT

It's Christmas Eve and the Ashwood City hierarchy are spending it in Los Angeles. For Patrick Nolan, it's a chance to solidify his masterplan, whilst Jess and Woody are tasked with retrieving the player on top of the club's christmas list - Joshua Nakatomi.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rhys Tees as Hutch Lewis

Additional voices

John Brannoch

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

The Offensive will return 06/01/2020 with a special F.A Cup Episode.

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 058 - Hutch Ado About Nothing

Mon, 16 Dec 2019 05:00:00 GMT

The bail is set for Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan's release as his cooperation with the investigation ensures a problematic scenario for Anaheim Sports Group owner Hutch Lewis; whose trust in Patrick is coming back to haunt him.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rhys Tees as Hutch Lewis

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Additional voices

Lucinda Shaw

Vanessa Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 057 - All's Well That Ends Well

Thu, 12 Dec 2019 21:00:23 GMT

It's the final game of the Europa League Group Stage and Ashwood City face Qarabag at home. In the lead up to kick off, the club hierarchy have arranged to shoot an advert.

Adam Jarrell as Chris Well

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 056 - Desert Storm II

Mon, 09 Dec 2019 05:00:00 GMT

A midweek Premier League clash with Everton is followed closely by Bournemouth away at the weekend. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan, however, is going to be absent from the visit to the South Coast as he is drawn back to Saudi Arabia at short notice.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Rhys Tees as Hutch Lewis

Additional voices

Nalan Burgess

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery and Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 055 - Theatre of Schemes

Mon, 02 Dec 2019 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood return to Premier League action at Old Trafford. Sharing a car journey together en route to the game, Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan discovers that Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall has been hatching a plan.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 054 - Slip of the Iceberg

Thu, 28 Nov 2019 21:00:00 GMT

It's Thursday night football yet again and Ashwood City are up against Rangers in Glasgow as their penultimate Europa League fixture sees them look to recover from their 4-0 defeat to Roma and their 3-0 domestic defeat to Leicester City. Last time out, Rangers boss Steven Gerrard neglected to shake Eric's hand, this time out Eric is looking to return the snub.

Thomas Mitchells as William van Ginkel

Nalan Burgess as Natasha Hardy

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Esmonde Cole as KFC

Adam Jarrell as Chris Well

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 053 - Desert Storm

Mon, 25 Nov 2019 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City are concluding a brief warm weather training session in Saudi Arabia ahead of the next Premier League matchweek. With a player revolt behind them; Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall are looking for the remaining conspirators.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Nalan Burgess as Claudia Seymour

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 052 - When The Man Comes Around

Mon, 11 Nov 2019 05:00:00 GMT

The Ashwood City hierarchy enter contract talks with former club captain Kieran Broom. After scoring the winner at the weekend away to Newcastle United, the Midfielder believes he holds all the aces as he attempts to orchestrate a potential return of the prodigal son, Dan Watson. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan on the other hand, has different ideas.

* The Offensive will return on 24.11.19, after the International Break

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rhys Tees as Rob Jefferson

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Additional Voices:

Acushla-Tara Kupe

Lynnette Shaw

John Brannoch

Lucinda Shaw

Thomas Mitchells

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 051 - Children of the Revolution

Thu, 07 Nov 2019 21:00:00 GMT

An emphatic home defeat to Manchester City has prompted an emergency Monday morning training session ahead of the Europa League home game v Roma... But a few senior players have other plans.

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Rhys Tees as Rob Jefferson

Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Directed by:

Joel Emery & Paul Waggott

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited --

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 050 - Lest He Forget

Mon, 04 Nov 2019 05:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City are playing host to the Champions; Manchester City on their final home Premier League game before Remembrance Day. A recent faux-pas by Patrick Nolan has prompted the Chief-Executive to keep a low profile on the matchday.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Rhys Tees as Hutch Lewis

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 049 - Fight at the Museum

Mon, 28 Oct 2019 05:00:00 GMT

It's the opening of the Ashwood City Museum. During preparations for the unveiling; Patrick, Jess and Woody explore the not-so-glorious past of the club. As Patrick prepares a speech to the press, things go from bad to worse.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 048 - The Boys Are Baku in Town

Thu, 24 Oct 2019 20:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City are in Baku, Azerbaijan following their fixture with Qarabag FK in the UEFA Europa League. With an early flight back to the UK the next day, the players are expected to get some much needed rest and recovery in the hotel.

Esmonde Cole as KFC

Adam Jarrell as Chris Well

Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 047 - Black Hawk Clown

Mon, 21 Oct 2019 04:00:00 GMT

The Premier League has returned from the international break and Ashwood City face Brighton at Dartley Park. With hastily made plans to find a sponsor for the former Gerry Harkness stand; the club face fierce protests and a possible boycott of the game.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Additional voices:

Luke Stevenson

Joel Emery

Lucinda Shaw

Alex Marshall

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited--

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 046 - Brussels Scouts

Mon, 07 Oct 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood City take on Tottenham Hotspur in the Premier League at the newly developed Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. Patrick and Woody are admiring not only the new stadium belonging to the North London club; but also one of their centre-backs.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 045 - A Tale of Two Coaches

Thu, 03 Oct 2019 20:00:00 GMT

Two Ashwood Managers, old and new face very different challenges as European football grips the continent yet again. For Ashwood City it's the Europa League and they play host to Rangers, while Valencia are at home to Ajax in the Champions League.

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Adam Jarrell as Chris Well

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 044 - Riches Get Itches

Mon, 30 Sep 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Pressure is mounting on Patrick as financial conduct, club form and dressing room turmoil are all catching up with him, he pays a visit to the club doctor to seek some medical assistance.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Additional voices: Luke Stevenson

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell & Paul Waggott

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 043 - The Volley of Youth

Mon, 23 Sep 2019 04:00:00 GMT

It's the first Premier League win of the season for Ashwood City and it comes on the road at West Ham. For Patrick, Woody and Jess the celebrations are on hold as matchday goalscorer and prized asset Kyle Francis-Clarke has gone AWOL in London following the unexpected victory.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional Voices:

Lucy-Jane Quinlan

Thomas Mitchells

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 042 - The Fools of Rome

Thu, 19 Sep 2019 20:00:00 GMT

The Europa League campaign kicks off in Rome, as Ashwood City take on AS Roma in their opening group game. Tensions with Kieran Broom continue to worsen as the side face a difficult challenge away from home.

Esmonde Cole as KFC

Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit

Adam Jarrell as Chris Well

Additional Voices:

Nalan Burgess

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 041 - Don't Count Your (Kentucky Fried) Chickens

Mon, 16 Sep 2019 04:00:00 GMT

The International break is over and Premier League football returns to Dartley Park as Ashwood City take on league leaders; Liverpool. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan has his work cut out to repair his relationships and reputation after the decision to relinquish the captaincy from Kieran Broom.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional Voices:

Rhys Tees

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 040 - The Hark Side

Mon, 02 Sep 2019 04:00:00 GMT

The club react to the sad news that Ashwood legend Gerry Harkness has passed away. Meanwhile, Patrick's dubious financial endeavours are beginning to catch up with him as local journalist Gareth McAskill is tipped off.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional Voices:

Nalan Burgess

Rhys Tees

Vanessa Emery

Lucinda Shaw

Luke Stevenson

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 039 - Nuno Way Out

Mon, 26 Aug 2019 06:48:36 GMT

Following a home defeat to Wolves, Patrick and Woody find themselves waiting outside new Head Coach Eric Van Smit's office. With no confidence and no signal - the pair must formulate a plan to let the Head Coach know exactly how they feel about Ashwood's torrid start to the season.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Additional Voices:

Lucinda Shaw

Luke Stevenson

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 038 - The Kiss of Death

Mon, 19 Aug 2019 04:00:00 GMT

After a disappointing draw with newly-promoted Sheffield United, the Ashwood City fans want answers. The Club's hierarchy, however, have other issues to attend to. An unfortunate traffic jam only adds to the problems of Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional Voices:

Thomas Mitchells

Esmonde Cole

Lucinda Shaw

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 037 - Gel Hath No Fury

Mon, 12 Aug 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Ashwood kick off their season away to Burnley and immediately face consequences from the result. With weeks of excessive spending behind him; Patrick is desperate to fix any squad issues before the next matchday.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger

Additional Voices:

Nalan Burgess

Thomas Mitchells

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

2019/20 SEASON: Deadline Day

Thu, 08 Aug 2019 16:00:00 GMT

After a summer of discontent, another managerial sacking and a few (mostly Dutch) signings, the new season is almost underway.

With the initial difficulties of the transfer window, Ashwood's troubles deepen after the release of an indecent image allegedly picturing a member of the playing staff.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional Voices:

Allon Sylvain

John Brannoch

Rhys Tees

Nalan Burgess

Thomas Mitchells

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 035 - Finale: Part 2

Mon, 13 May 2019 04:00:00 GMT

The game is underway. The only thing standing between Ashwood City and Europa League football is Fulham FC. Woody is still nowhere to be seen as the tentative first half draws to a close.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional voices:

Lucinda Shaw

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

This is a Primley Limited Production.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 034 - Finale: Part 1

Mon, 06 May 2019 04:00:21 GMT

The takeover is under threat with an unexpected victory at Leicester City. With other league results in their favour, Ashwood find themselves in 7th and currently qualifying for the UEFA Europa League; which would cancel the sale due to the current ownership's stipulations on European football. Patrick Nolan is left to find a way to ensure the deal goes through and the chances of finishing 7th are quashed.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Rhys Tees as Hutch Lewis

Elliot Gindi as Mohamed Al-Zawi

Additional voices:

Nalan Burgess

Lucinda Shaw

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

This is a Primley Limited Production.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 033: Oman Where Art Thou

Mon, 29 Apr 2019 04:00:00 GMT

An immediate and unprecedented breakthrough in the future of Ashwood City as Omani billionaire Mohamed Al-Zawi prepares a £615m bid for the club. With the news spreading fast, Ashwood Head Coach Rod Meadows is preparing for life under the new regime.

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Elliot Gindi as Mohamed Al-Zawi

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 032: Thrown to the Wolves

Mon, 22 Apr 2019 04:00:11 GMT

Whilst attending a team bonding week Patrick recounts to Woody his latest foray with Gary Briggs during the Easter weekend's victory against Wolverhampton Wanderers.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 031: Masters of the Universe

Mon, 15 Apr 2019 04:00:40 GMT

Patrick has met with Ashwood City owner Hutch Lewis at the US Masters in Augusta, Georgia to decide the future of their relationship and the club. Joining him on the business trip are Jess Tate and Chris 'Woody' Woodall who are taking in some of the golf that's on offer.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rhys Tees as Hutch Lewis

Additional voices:

Lucinda Shaw

Nalan Burgess

Vanessa Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 030 - War Games

Mon, 08 Apr 2019 04:00:10 GMT

Off the back of the defeat to Liverpool; Ashwood are dealing with the fallout from Willy Amadou's celebration in which he used the corner flag to simulate gunfire. With the club under scrutiny, it would seem Patrick is going about his normal business in trying to throw Chief Operating Officer Gary Briggs under the bus.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Additional voices:

Alex Marshall

Thomas Mitchells

Lucinda Shaw

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 029: Singing in the Rain

Mon, 01 Apr 2019 04:00:34 GMT

With enormous pressure mounting on the club, Patrick has seen an opportunity to win over the support of the ownership by adapting Head Coach Rod Meadows negative tactics. Leading the playing-style negotiations is Chris 'Woody' Woodall; as the Sporting Director and Suspended Chairman attempt to have a say on what happens on the pitch.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 028: The Ides of March

Mon, 18 Mar 2019 05:00:00 GMT

Patrick offers his conditions to withdraw as Chairman and return as Chief-Executive under Hutch's ownership. With the board refusing his offer, Patrick looks to take vengeance on their upcoming home fixture against Newcastle.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional voices:

Nalan Burgess

Lucinda Shaw

Luke Stevenson

Rhys Tees

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 027: From Borussia With Love

Mon, 11 Mar 2019 05:00:07 GMT

Ashwood City are looking to entertain various potential corporate clients and sponsors for next season; permitting Premier League survival. As the club look to send staff on various networking trips - Jess and Woody have made their own personal excursion to a more prestigious venue.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 026: An Englishman, An Irishman and A Scotsman

Mon, 04 Mar 2019 05:00:48 GMT

An Englishman, An Irishman and A Scotsman walk into a Barcelona training camp... Ashwood City send Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall to convince club hot prospect Javier Cabello to return to England and fulfill his schoolboy contract.

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Paul Bullion as Ethan Jones

John Walsh Brannoch as Colin Walsh

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Additional voices:

Lucinda Shaw

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 025: Tour de Farce

Mon, 25 Feb 2019 05:00:48 GMT

After being suspended from the club, Patrick is exploring ways to get back into power. Old friends in low places secure him a meeting with a lawyer to assist.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

George Still as Geoff Monroe

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 024: A Domestic Coup

Mon, 11 Feb 2019 05:00:34 GMT

Gary Briggs, the newly appointed Ashwood City Chief Operating Officer is finalising his contract along with Alex Morrison, a Marketing Director, as the club add key additions to their office staff. The new arrivals however; struggle to fit in with club stalwarts Jess Tate and Chris 'Woody' Woodall.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison

Additional voices:

Rhys Tees

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 023: You Can't Win Anything With Kids

Mon, 04 Feb 2019 05:00:58 GMT

Ashwood City have gone viral thanks to a racially motivated incident in a local McDonald's. Jess has arranged a trip to the Ashwood Children's Hospital to provide some much needed PR and connection with the young fanbase. In an effort to spread the joy; Patrick has arrived with some gifts from the club shop.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Lucinda Shaw

Rhys Tees

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 022: Deadline Day

Thu, 31 Jan 2019 23:19:49 GMT

The Ivan Lloyd deal is in its final moments and the Ashwood City hierarchy contend with the unexpected appearance of Liverpool midfielder Harry Weaver in their staff car park.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Lucinda Shaw

Rhys Tees

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 021: Cheques, Spies, Videotape

Mon, 21 Jan 2019 05:00:25 GMT

A leaked disgruntled conference held with the written press by Rod Meadows hits home following suspicious activity during a sports science program at the training ground. Tension is rising at the club as the likelihood of selling Ivan Lloyd suddenly becomes very real.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Lucinda Shaw

Luke Stevenson

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 020: Staff Announcement

Mon, 14 Jan 2019 05:00:41 GMT

Back-to-back wins have put Ashwood into 14th and now they face the prospect of Crystal Palace at home. Pre-match, Ashwood are looking to announce a major new signing and have hired a specialist events company for the announcement.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Nicola Kill as Kate Sinclair

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 019: El Crapico

Mon, 07 Jan 2019 05:00:20 GMT

It's time for the FA Cup Third Round and The Kent Derby. Off the back of an encouraging run under new manager Rod Meadows the Ashwood City bus is stopped in its tracks outside Priestfield Stadium in Gillingham as the local crowds block its approach.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 018: The Christmas Special One

Mon, 24 Dec 2018 05:00:59 GMT

MERRY CHRISTMAS

The Offensive will return on Monday 7th January with an FA Cup special.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Rhys Tees as Hutch Lewis

Oliver Dowling as Benedict Rice

Denis Michallet as Felix Grosjean

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 017: The Transfer Committee

Mon, 17 Dec 2018 05:00:08 GMT

With the transfer window opening in just over two weeks and with a new Head Coach lined up to replace the struggling Felix Grosjean; Ashwood are conducting their annual transfer committee. Amidst the chaotic player recruitment and research, Patrick is looking to sign his player that will secure funds for Thomas Fell and ensure Patrick receives 15% of the club for a cut price.

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Additional voices:

Rhys Tees

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 016: I'm A Chief Exec... Get Me Out of Here

Mon, 10 Dec 2018 05:00:00 GMT

As Ashwood are drawn against Kent rivals Gillingham in the FA Cup third round; Patrick has gone AWOL from the club as he attempts to close in on his purchase of the Ashwood City shares.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Maude Hirst as Elaine Keller

Additional voices:

Joel Emery

Oliver Dowling

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 015: Good Klopp Bad Klopp

Mon, 03 Dec 2018 05:00:20 GMT

As Ashwood prepare for the visit of Liverpool, Patrick is infuriated following derogatory comments about Ashwood from Jurgen Klopp and various analysts within the mainstream media. In an effort to enact revenge and give Ashwood the upper hand in the game he and Woody take drastic steps.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Rhys Tees

Nalan Burgess

Jonny Blain

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 014: Board Games

Mon, 26 Nov 2018 05:00:18 GMT

Another defeat - this time away to relegation candidates Huddersfield Town, leaves Ashwood in the bottom three for the first time this season. The ownership begin to have mixed feelings about their Head Coach Felix Grosjean; leaving Patrick, Jess and Woody tasked with planning for the future. For Patrick, the vote of confidence from the board members takes an opportunistic turn...

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening, follow the club on twitter @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 013: Battle of the Bastards

Sun, 11 Nov 2018 15:00:18 GMT

As Ashwood City combat a supporter protest during a game where both home and away fans have been banned; Woody is entering his third week of suspension, and is looking to make a comeback.

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Additional voices:

Omari Douglas

Sam Hallahan

Luke Stevenson

Oliver Dowling

Simon Shaw

Rhys Tees

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 012: Snakes on a Train

Sun, 04 Nov 2018 10:00:37 GMT

As the scandal deepens and FA investigations continue, Head of Ethics: Benedict Rice, along with Chief Executive Patrick Nolan and the Vice Head of Football Operations Nick Bernardi have accompanied the playing staff aboard the train to Newcastle, as a show of solidarity for their upcoming fixture.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Sam Hallahan as Nick 'The Prick' Bernardi

Oliver Dowling as Benedict Rice

Additional voices:

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 011: Boats on a Scandal

Sun, 28 Oct 2018 15:00:50 GMT

During the height of the media storm following The Portsmouth Matter, Ashwood face Cardiff City on the pitch and an FA investigation off it, courtesy of the new Ashwood City Director of Ethics; Benedict Rice.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Oliver Dowling as Benedict Rice

Additional voices:

Omari Douglas

Rachel Summers

Jo Price

Lucy-Jane Quinlan

Dean Kilbey

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hall of the Mountain King Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License

http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 010: Lost in Translation

Sun, 21 Oct 2018 14:42:44 GMT

Ashwood City travel to Burnley after a disastrous and perplexing opening press conference for the new Head Coach; Felix Grosjean. The match takes a turn for the worse after a bust-up in the tunnel between Felix and Burnley manager Sean Dyche. Ashwood's problems deepen as the translator hired by Felix isn't fulfilling his duties.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Denis Michallet as Felix Grosjean / Bruno Duvall

Additional voices:

Omari Douglas

Nalan Burgess

Luke Stevenson

Joel Emery

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 009: The French Connection

Sun, 07 Oct 2018 18:50:23 GMT

Patrick and Woody are en route to Marseille to obtain the services of Head Coach Felix Grosjean, but a stumbling block is put in their place as the Marseille Chief-Executive is having second thoughts. Jess is tasked with keeping Chinese betting corporation, and Ashwood City shirt sponsor; iBET sweet, but heavy concessions are required.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Omari Douglas

Denis Michallet

Wen Theaker

Trev Neo

Joel Emery

Jonny Sharples

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 008: Out of Office

Sun, 30 Sep 2018 22:08:41 GMT

Following yet another defeat, this time at the hands of Chelsea; Ashwood City FC face action in the form of a last-minute supporter protest. With the club image in tatters, Jess is tasked with disrupting the protest and buying Ashwood some time - yet she has some commitments of her own.

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Lucy-Jane Quinlan as Erica

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Omari Douglas

Nalan Burgess

Luke Stevenson

Joel Emery

Oliver Dowling

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 007: Big Sam and Fries

Sun, 23 Sep 2018 17:10:31 GMT

Ashwood are moments away from hiring Big Sam as the ownership throw a last minute obstacle in their way. Meanwhile, as Liam Brightwell looks to take charge of his second game as caretaker manager, a disastrous Ashwood City tweet dismisses him from the club.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Dane Baptiste as Liam Brightwell

Nalan Burgess as Jane

Lucy-Jane Quinlan as Erica

Rachel Summers as Simone

Rhys Tees as Sam Green

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 006: Howe to Cheat Death

Sun, 16 Sep 2018 19:30:16 GMT

As Ashwood City failed to recruit a new manager during the international break they face Bournemouth with former under 23s coach Liam Brightwell as caretaker manager. Following the match Patrick is detained in Eddie Howe's office after a death threat is made on his life.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Dane Baptiste as Liam Brightwell

Acushla-Tara Kupe as Helen Weston

Additional voices:

Omari Douglas

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 005: Long Live The King

Sun, 02 Sep 2018 12:28:28 GMT

Following a huge result for Ashwood, Dan Watson's comments in a post-match interview leave reverberations around the club as Patrick, Jess and Woody attempt to curtail the lofty ambitions of their manager.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Additional voices:

Jo Price

Lucinda Shaw

Omari Douglas

Sirena Riley

Suzie Houlihan

Rhys Tees

Larner Wallace-Taylor

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 004: The Last Supper

Sun, 26 Aug 2018 15:01:25 GMT

On the eve of their game at Crystal Palace; Patrick, Woody and Dan have met for dinner in London. As the night progresses Dan becomes increasingly frustrated that his expected dinner guest in Roy Hodgson is yet to show.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Additional voices:

Omari Douglas

Rhys Tees

Raphaela Israel-Öbeñg

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 003: The Prince of Harkness

Sun, 19 Aug 2018 17:14:53 GMT

In their first home game of the season, Ashwood City play host to Brighton as stadium developments cause havoc.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Omari Douglas

Rhys Tees

Oliver Dowling

Dean Kilbey

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 002: The Biter from the Balkans

Sun, 12 Aug 2018 15:10:18 GMT

Ashwood get their season underway at Vicarage Road as some serious foul play from their Croatian midfielder leaves Head of Communications Jess Tate clearing up the mess.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Additional voices:

Jo Price

Omari Douglas

Rhys Tees

Oliver Dowling

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 001: Transfer Deadline Day

Thu, 09 Aug 2018 12:32:59 GMT

Join Ashwood City FC on deadline day as the club's lack of spending during the window sparks an internal crisis. After manager Dan Watson appears on national radio to air his frustrations regarding a quiet transfer window, club Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is left with his Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall to try and get a handle on things.

Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan

Helena Doughty as Jess Tate

Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall

Joel Emery as Dan Watson

Additional voices:

Jo Price

Lucinda Shaw

Omari Douglas

Sirena Riley

Rhys Tees

Oliver Dowling

Denis Michallet

Episode written by:

Joel Emery

Directed by:

Adam Jarrell

Edited by:

Adam Jarrell

Executive Producer:

Joel Emery

WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

Listener discretion is advised.

Thanks for listening to The Offensive. Follow the club @AshwoodCity

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.