Join the Conversation

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What We Cover:

Katherine’s Staycation in Brooklyn

• Enjoying a peaceful Labor Day weekend in the city
• I took strolls through the Botanic Gardens, made new connections, and spent time with family during US Open Fan Week
• Embracing the quieter side of New York and savoring the moment

Shelbi’s West Coast Check-In

• Recording from San Francisco, a city she’s revisiting with gratitude after years of traveling there for work
• Prepping for a family wedding in Minneapolis before an action-packed return to New York
• I look forward to attending the US Open, hosting a family for an Usher concert, and jetting off to Amsterdam
• Balancing a busy schedule with being present and appreciating every experience

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

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What We Cover:

Commune & Connect

• Appreciating the joy of witnessing friends in love at weddings and reconnecting with people from shared walks of life
• Tapping into the cultural moment of the Olympics while acknowledging the economic realities of many athletes beyond the American Dream narrative
• Recognizing the dual nature of national camaraderie and the complexity of global sporting events

Music Sounds Better with You

• The joy of live music (especially with respectful and inclusive crowds) keeps it an experience worth seeking
• The Brooklyn block party effect—creates a sense of home and community even if you don’t live on the block
• Understanding the culture of block parties and the importance of engaging with respect, not just for the event itself

Summer Energy at a Fall Pace

• Excitement for the slower pace of fall after a high-energy summer
• Consider which summer feelings and experiences to carry into quieter seasons for sustained connection
• Prioritizing meaningful conversations and creating spaces to commune and connect

Question of the Week:

What type of big group gatherings have you found energizing or inspiring, and how do you hope to carry summer’s inspiration into the new seasons?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Jobs Come & Go, Work Friends Come With

• Looking back at work friends from the last 10+ years and how those relationships have evolved over time
• Seeking career insights from both industry peers and friends from entirely different fields
• Balancing the realities of entrepreneurship with the need to promote your business authentically—sometimes with a healthy dose of delusion

Directness Clarifies Direction

• Understanding that how you present your work is just as important as the quality of the work itself
• The art of asking for advice—why vague "pick your brain" requests often lead to unproductive conversations
• Being transparent and direct about what you do and want to achieve is essential

Authentically Curated Connection

• The unique power of networking in NYC, a vast but interconnected city.
• Creating intentional, welcoming environments that make it easier to build meaningful connections.
• Shelbi’s experience at a recent EV Salon event, an invite-only gathering that facilitates handpicked, high-impact connections.

Question of the Week:

How have your friendships impacted your career, and how have these connections shifted as you’ve grown professionally?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

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Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

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What We Cover:

Quick Shifts, Big Changes

• Unpacking Adiv’s viral TikTok about experiencing loneliness as a 30-something in Los Angeles.
• This section discusses how friendships and social dynamics evolve as people enter different life stages and how they can strengthen or transform in unexpected ways.
• It is essential to recognize that loneliness is not exclusive to single people—those in relationships also experience changes in priorities and social interactions.

Common Ground in Evolving Landscapes

• Examining how societal norms shape friendships and why they can make some people feel othered.
• The role of curiosity and empathy in maintaining connections as life transitions unfold.
• Understanding when shifting priorities changes a friendship's fulfillment level and what that means for its future.

Embracing the Home That Holds You

• Finding comfort, fulfillment, and beauty in having a home to yourself or sharing it with a partner
• Acknowledging that no life stage is inherently better—solo and partnered households have unique benefits and challenges
• Appreciating that while life can feel richer with the right people around you, there is also value in embracing your current season and finding the friendships that support you through it

Question of the Week:

How have shifts in romantic relationship statuses in your circle shaped (or not shaped) the dynamics of your friendships?

Stay Connected

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Letting Vibes Lead in Finding the Right People

• The power of deep bonds with given family, chosen family, and platonic partners
• Choosing to surround yourself with people who align with your values and needs
• The importance of mutual understanding and adaptability in maintaining friendships through life transitions

The Unclear Nature of Gaining Clarity

• The difficulty of setting expectations and boundaries in friendships
• How reciprocity works (and doesn’t work) in relationships, and why overextending yourself rarely benefits anyone (referencing Vibe Check’s Do It While It’s Still Legal and Danielle Bayard Jackson’s Fighting for Our Friendships)
• Understanding that no one technically owes you anything, but open communication and mutual care are essential for sustaining meaningful friendships

Medium Friends

• The role of “medium friendships” may not be our closest connections, but they serve essential social and emotional needs (inspired by Lisa Miller’s The Vexing Problem of the ‘Medium Friend’ in The New York Times)
• The reality of friendship turnover—with 30-40% of medium friends shifting annually
• Moving away from ranking friendships in favor of recognizing each connection's unique benefits and limitations

Question of the Week:

Do you feel like you’re focusing your deep friendships on the right people? What is your perspective on the role of medium friends in your life right now?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

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Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

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What We Cover:

Who’s Holding Us & How We Support Our People

• The balance of pressing pause on texts to be fully present with the people right before us.
• Managing a text hiatus and reduced screen time while still maintaining meaningful connections
• Meeting our close friends and family where they’re at—emotionally and physically

Spinning Many Plates & Overstimulation

• Personal evolution can shift levels of attention and engagement, sometimes leading to misalignment in relationships
• Limiting the personal “hotline” and being intentional about who gets our energy and time
• Balancing spontaneity and structure—embracing the flow of summer plans while making space for deeper connections

Balm for the Hot Summer

• Finding small joys, from The Evening Scoop (of gelato) to being the ultimate wingwoman
• Showing up for friends, no matter the season—good or tough
• Sharon Brous's New York Times piece "Train Yourself to Always Show Up" reminds us to step toward those who hold us tenderly without requiring heroic gestures

Question of the Week:

Who’s holding you, who are you holding, and what’s serving as a balm for you right now?

Join the Conversation

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Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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Tune in as they share their post-Fourth of July reflections, travel highlights, and personal updates, offering a glimpse into their experiences from two different settings.

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Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Let’s Be Social vs. Follow for Follow

• Social media can be a powerful tool for connection, allowing us to build meaningful relationships with people we may never have met otherwise
• Using social platforms as forums for learning, inspiration, and thought-provoking conversations
• We must acknowledge how social media can feel both deeply connective and isolating and why it’s essential to examine our relationship with it and take breaks when needed

The Strategy of Sharing

• I am inspired by Dr. Darian, a multi-hyphenate who shares his work, life, and vulnerabilities in a way that invites engagement and connection
• How authentically sharing personal stories, interests, and experiences can inspire and resonate with others

Laying It All Out

• Embracing documenting and sharing the creative process to make work more accessible and relatable
• Finding the balance between living in the moment and documenting it, ensuring that sharing remains intentional rather than performative
• Navigating what to share vs. what to keep private and how to create a positive, connected space online

Question of the Week:

What’s your relationship with social media, and how does it influence your relationship with others?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Hearing the Voice Within (& the Voices Around Us)

• How childhood environments shape our ability and willingness to listen to ourselves
• The role of intuition and introspection in relationships—especially when friends and loved ones engage with these practices differently
• The power of “transitional characters” who break generational cycles by profoundly listening to themselves (inspired by We Can Do Hard Things – Breaking Generational Cycles: Embodiment & Healing Trauma with Prentis Hemphill)

Navigating Belonging and the Fear of Being Perceived

• The fear of being perceived and ignoring personal blind spots can prevent authentic self-expression
• Recognizing that belonging and safety sometimes take precedence over fully embracing what we hear from within
• Understanding that not everyone is on the same path of self-listening requires empathy and acceptance, and you can’t bring everyone with you

Celebrating Yourself Becomes a Party with Others

• Honoring your wants, needs, and boundaries is essential to self-listening
• How expressing desires in relationships fosters more substantial, more authentic connections
• Celebrating yourself and sharing that joy is necessary to uplift the people around you

Question of the Week:

Do you think you’re listening to yourself enough, and how does this impact how you interact with others?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

The Power of Open Communication

• Being a good listener requires being fully present and attentive
• Asking what a friend needs from a conversation helps set expectations and respect boundaries
• Navigating repetitive conversations with patience while understanding when to offer support vs. solutions

Creating Safe Spaces for Sharing

• Vulnerability strengthens friendships, and creating safe spaces for honest conversations is essential
• Silence can sometimes be a warning sign—checking in with friends ensures they feel supported
• Listening with the intent to understand is a foundational skill for deepening connection and fostering empathy, even in moments of disagreement

Acknowledging Differences and Avoiding Toxic Positivity

• Exposure to different perspectives allows for personal growth and deeper understanding
• Truth is often subjective and shaped by individual experiences
• Toxic positivity can invalidate real emotions and prevent meaningful conversations—being an active and empathetic listener helps create a more authentic connection

Question of the Week:

In what ways do you think you could be a better listener, and what listening superpowers do you feel you have that you could use more?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Define the… Friendship

• How childhood experiences with making friends shape our ability to build connections as adults in less structured environments
• The changing workplace landscape and how increased digital connection impacts new friendships and socialization (referencing Te-Ping Chen’s The Loneliness of the American Worker in The Wall Street Journal)
• Accepting awkward fumbles as part of the process and the importance of creating structure when making new friends (inspired by J.P. Brammer’s Hola Papi: How to Make Friends As an Adult in The Cut)

Fighting for Our Friendships

• Research shows that it takes 34 hours to make a friend—a reminder that friendships require time and intention
• Strong friendships have health benefits, with some studies comparing the impact of loneliness to the dangers of smoking
• The delicate balance of giving people grace for difficult conversations while acknowledging the role that pride, shame, and capacity limitations play in conflict and resolution

The Mechanics of Female Friendship

• Jackson’s three core principles that bond female friendships are symmetry, secrecy, and support
• The fight against ambiguity and misperception creates open and honest conversations about each friend’s needs
• How life changes, evolving friendships, and misaligned expectations can lead to a necessary reckoning—deciding when a friendship is no longer serving you

Question of the Week:

How can you cultivate new friendships in a way that gives them a chance to develop and thrive? And what are you looking for in friendship?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Making Time for What Matters

• How our brains perceive time and space, and why time sometimes feels like it moves too fast or too slow (referencing Denise John, PhD’s How to Slow Down Time and studies by cognitive neuroscientist Martin Wiener, PhD*)*
• Reflections on how time feels in this season of life and how to optimize daily routines to make the most of it
• To strengthen connections, prioritize relationships that stimulate the mind, set intentional communication cadences (inspired by @sundaskhalidd’s Thread), and travel to see loved ones

Protecting Our Greatest Commodity

• The balance between protecting your time by disappearing (as discussed on Stars and Stars with Isa featuring Saeed Jones) and keeping time open for your closest people
• Relieving the pressure to always be available or always out and about in favor of focusing on what feels meaningful
• The role of discipline and rituals in moving personal goals forward versus relying on dopamine-fueled momentum that often fades quickly

When the Work is Not Working

• Understanding chronotypes to determine your body’s natural rhythm for sleep and productivity (referencing the Sleep Foundation’s overview of chronotypes).
• Looking back at early education and work experiences, the tension between personal work styles and institutional expectations, and knowing when to cut the cord
• Reclaiming unstructured, present moments—whether by wandering aimlessly or casually hosting friends (inspired by Kurt Vonnegut’s 2005 PBS interview and Jancee Dunn’s The New York Times article, Why Don’t Adults Hang Out Anymore?).

Question of the Week:

How does your relationship with time feel right now, and what do you think needs to be further supported or shifted?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Miss Independent Phones a Friend

• Why shedding the Miss Independent mindset can create more opportunities for support
• How others’ perceptions of self-sufficiency can impact the help we receive
• The undefined expectations in friendships and how they shape support systems (referencing Cleo Wade’s Remember Love and Danielle Bayard Jackson’s TikTok on friendship dynamics*)*
• Communication strategies between friends can influence the help we receive in everyday life and during challenging moments

Time to Send in the Experts

• Recognizing when to ask for help by assessing capacity, curiosity, and skillset.
• The power of peer mentors and coaches as a form of collaborative problem-solving
• Outsourcing as a learned skill—it often comes at a cost but leads to better outcomes

Calling All Good Samaritans

• The teamwork behind creative projects, from personal endeavors to Beyoncé’s Renaissance Tour, and the many players who bring a vision to life
• People are often willing to help strangers, even if they are not always warm
• Managing help can be challenging—delegating can add emotional and logistical weight to leadership
• Navigating the tension between people-first leadership and corporate demands—and why honest communication, while risky, can elevate everyone involved

Question of the Week:

What areas of your life could you use more help to pursue what you want and need?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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Listen as they share their updates from two different coasts—covering everything from creative challenges and new inspirations to fun moments and reflections on friendship. This episode combines personal anecdotes and professional updates, offering a behind-the-scenes look at what they’ve been up to.

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Money Moves 101

• Early perceptions of money often stem from childhood, where items like the custom NikeID Shox held social currency
• The journey from high school jobs to careers in our 30s reveals how people prioritize money in different ways
• Focusing on personal financial values is essential rather than comparing spending habits to others

Envy and Money Are Different Shades of Green

• Financial resources extend beyond direct monetary support—help, access, and opportunities also shape financial security but are often overlooked in comparisons
• Curiosity about others’ financial choices can be a learning tool rather than a source of judgment.
• The contrast between attending big-ticket events like weddings and bachelorette parties versus prioritizing smaller, quality time moments.

Family Dinner Vibes

• Exploring the emotional and logistical aspects of dual-income households, single life, and community-building in a society structured around partnership
• Normalizing casual hosting with friends to meet basic needs and create fulfilling moments
• Debating whether homemade ice cream parties should be in the future lineup

Question of the Week:

How do your finances influence—or not influence—how you interact and spend time with friends? How do you plan to adjust your social habits with the coming warmer weather? What creative ways can you add to your social rolodex?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

All About The Aperitivo Society

• A community designed to bring people together in New England over a shared love of food and drink
• Maria’s TikTok post about wanting to host fun dinner parties and meet new people led to nearly 700 members overnight, creating an engaged and growing community
• She experiences living in different cities, making friends through Bumble BFF, and ultimately forming her own space for connection

An Honest Take on Community Building

• The highs and lows of developing a community-driven initiative
• Staying organized with a calendar and prioritizing “energy givers” to maintain balance while working a 9-to-5 job is essential

Learning & Growing Alongside Members

• The valuable feedback Maria has received from The Aperitivo Society and how she balances member input with her vision
• The formation of micro-communities through Geneva fosters deeper relationships within the larger group
• The future of The Aperitivo Society, including the upcoming Boston retail space, THE SHOP
• Maria’s advice for aspiring community builders, her hosting philosophy, tips for cooking for a crowd, and her favorite Boston spots

Explore The Aperitivo Society

• Website: The Aperitivo Society
• Instagram: @aperitivosociety
• Follow THE SHOP: @aperitivo__theshop

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Everything on Demand

• Streaming services have shifted how we experience television, but nostalgia-driven reboots like Reba and Sex and the City still create shared cultural moments and online discourse.
• The sheer volume of content makes virality feel even more surprising and communal (we see you, Black Twitter).
• Delivery apps and on-demand services provide efficiency but can also diminish in-person connection—finding a balance between time as money and engaged participation in the community is key.

Data-Driven Tech Meets Social Competition

• Social media’s on-demand highlight reel can be motivating and disheartening, particularly given that millennial “experience culture,” fast fashion, and online status expectations shape our ideas about what we should do.
• Gen Z’s shift toward showing a broader range of real-life experiences (like Brittney Reynolds) provides a more authentic way to connect and reduce misconceptions about others’ lives.
• Wearable tech can empower health and knowledge, but knowing what enhances vs. overwhelms is up to the consumer.
• AirPods have become status symbols of convenience and isolation, offering connection while shutting out the world (referencing Scott Galloway’s 2018 tweet on Ian Bogost’s Atlantic article, "Apple’s AirPods Are an Omen").

Advancements Come with Cultural Setbacks

• Looking back at nostalgic television and past warnings about technology reminds us that progress is cyclical and that the past, present, and future remain intertwined.
• The on-demand world isn’t going away, but we can choose where to bring human connection back into the equation.

Question of the Week:

In what ways would you like to shift your relationship to an on-demand culture to better connect with others?

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations.

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What We Cover:

Are We Mad at Something We All Want?

• Eli Rallo’s TikTok sparked debate by claiming friend groups are terrible and limiting
• Many people desire to be part of a friend group, so this take may validate those who feel excluded
• While cliques can create negative experiences, “friend group” is a broad term that varies based on the people and the dynamics at play

Pro-Camaraderie, Anti-Groupthink

• Friend groups can be more challenging to form in adulthood, but they no longer resemble the rigid cliques of high school
• Beyond belonging, groups expand experiences, foster playfulness, and create spontaneity
• When friends move away, the group dynamic becomes a key way to stay connected across distance

Seasons of Socialization & Going Out

• Friendship has seasons, but socializing is also impacted by the four seasons themselves, with winter often bringing more exclusivity
• The pandemic shifted how people go out and build community, and many are still adjusting
• Embracing parties just because, less overthinking when making plans, and being okay with the natural friction of leaving the house

Question of the Week:

What do you think about friend groups and their role in your life? How do your group dynamics (or one-on-one friendships) shape how you spend your social time?

Spring Break Announcement:

The show is on Spring Break next week and returns on April 24. Catch up on past episodes and leave us some notes for when we return.

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations!

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What We Cover:

Strong Friendships Stretch Together

• Adult friendships require emotional support, celebration, and adventure
• The five love languages, plus the newer additions of shared experiences and emotional security, shape how we show up for our friends
• Finding creative ways to spend time together and evolve as friends can feel overwhelming, but it is ultimately rewarding

It Takes a Village

• Society often prioritizes romantic relationships over platonic ones, which can be frustrating for those without a romantic partner
• Giving grace to friends who may have never experienced deep friendship and encouraging them to invest in it
• Actively choosing to curate a village of friends who believe in building a life together
• Evaluating the risk of friendships fading due to capacity or effort (referencing Frank Bruni’s The Friends Who Got Away in The New York Times)

Friendships Fit for the Future

• Exploring friendships that mirror romantic partnerships in terms of emotional closeness and shared responsibilities
• The joy of friends’ people becoming your people, expanding community in an organic and meaningful way

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations!

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What We Cover:

Friendship Breakups and, Dare We Say, Divorces

• Platonic relationships can be just as intense and emotionally complex as romantic ones
• Two things can be true: friendship breakups can be devastating, but they can also be freeing when a relationship no longer serves you
• Sometimes friendships end with an unspoken silent line drawn in the sand, especially when personal capacity shifts and support feels one-sided
• The debate between “the chop” (directly cutting someone out of your life) versus recognizing when a friendship has naturally ended

Trusting Your Gut vs. Making Room for Evolution

• Balancing care for someone and shared history with maintaining self-respect and boundaries
• Friendships are some of the longest-standing relationships we have, but knowing when change is necessary is key
• Not everyone deserves unconditional grace and consideration, and recognizing this can be an act of self-preservation

Lingering at a Standstill

• How do you determine the next step when a friendship feels off but remains unresolved?
• Standstills can be deeply quiet, with a lack of communication, differing narratives, or unspoken resentment
• Some people may avoid accountability when they hold more power to societal norms, making it easier for them to disengage rather than repair
• Navigating the balance between addressing an issue and letting it go, especially when it allows people continued access to your life via social media without genuine engagement

Question of the Week:

Have you ever gone through a friendship breakup or a standstill? What tools and language did you have (or lack) to navigate it, and how did it impact you and your friend?

Stay Connected:

• Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod
• Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

Please email us at tablepancakespod@gmail.com. We would appreciate your rating, reviewing, and subscribing to the show!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What We Cover:

Love Where You Live

• What makes a neighborhood feel like home, and how it shapes daily life
• Favorite neighborhood restaurants and cafes that bring a sense of community
• How we engage with and contribute to the places we call home

Neighbor or Friend?

• The comfort of having someone looking out for you, especially as two single women
• The quirky, unpredictable interactions that come with living close to others
• Whether simply living near someone is enough to form a meaningful friendship

Suburban Skeptics

• The pros and cons of city life versus the suburbs
• The commitment to a car-free commute and what it means for quality of life
• Seeking out diverse communities and escaping the monoculture of suburban life

Question of the Week:

Are you making friends in your neighborhood, inviting existing friends into your neighborhood, or befriending your neighbors?

Stay Connected:

• Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod
• Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

Please email us at tablepancakespod@gmail.com. We’d love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What We Cover:

Embracing Friends as Family

• Close friends often become chosen family and may even form bonds with your given family
• Friendships can serve as accountability partnerships, providing honest feedback and support in reaching personal and professional goals
• With less free time, staying connected requires creativity—whether through long voice notes, “mini podcasts,” or body doubling for mutual support

Shifting Priorities and New Normals

• Life changes can create distance between friends, and it is natural to both offer grace and feel disappointment when dynamics shift
• Not everyone seeks deep, intimate connection in friendships, so it is essential to find people who align with your relational needs
• There is value in discussing the future with friends and how to stay connected as life and communities change

Distance Makes the Heart Grow… Discerning

• Distance does not have to be negative—it can mean recognizing mismatched expectations and choosing relationships that align with your authentic self
• Everyone plays a role in navigating friendship distance and deciding whether to reach out, adjust expectations, or let things naturally evolve

Join the Conversation

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you enjoyed this episode, we would love it if you rated, reviewed, and subscribed to the show. Your support helps us continue these conversations!

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What We Cover:

The Necessity of Sharing Your Work

• Why sharing is part of the creative process—helping you connect, expand your reach, and refine your craft.
• Showing your most authentic self through your work, whether it’s a polished final product or behind-the-scenes glimpses.
• Acknowledging that many creatives are multi-hyphenates, some 9-to-5 jobs are great incubators for side projects.

Embracing Marketing (Even When It Feels Hard)

• Developing the skill of sharing—even when it feels counterintuitive to reveal the process.
• Social media can be intimidating (hi, Instagram’s mixed audience), but it’s also a space where people want to cheer you on.
• Not every creative is a marketer, and not every marketer is a creative (inspired by Rebecca Jennings’ Vox article, Everyone’s a Sellout Now).

Being a Fan of Your Work

• Why loving your work matters, inspired by Tyler, The Creator’s Converse interview (starting at 43:19).
• Your level of self-promotion should match the time, energy, and passion you put into creating.
• A healthy dose of shamelessness helps you push forward even when the stars don’t fully align.

Let’s All Be Hype Friends

• Supporting creative friends can look like this:
• Unconditional likes & engagement
• Constructive feedback with context
• Emotional support that fuels the work
• Keeping a circle of fellow creatives provides community, fresh perspectives, and inspiration.
• Having an elevator pitch for your work makes it easier for friends to champion you when you're not in the room.
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Join the Conversation!

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you love Table Pancakes, rate, review, and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform! Your support helps us grow.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What We Cover:

Understanding What We Want & Need from Alone Time

• Human Design helps determine when and how we need solitude—whether for rest, reflection, or inspiration.
• Communicating your need for solo time so others know when you’re recharging is essential.

Finding Comfort in Being With Yourself

• Using solo time to pursue personal goals, cultivate contentment, and deepen self-awareness.
• “If you are lonely when you’re alone, you are in bad company.” – Jean-Paul Sartre
• The delicious nature of solitude and the idea that “you are with you” (inspired by Gwendolyn Brooks’ poem "Aloneness" from her 1974 University of Iowa reading).

The Cost of Convenience Over Connection

• Why social media voyeurism isn’t a real connection—but engaging with someone’s content can be a low-effort way to spark conversation.
• Extending invitations to connect is essential, even when solo time feels comfortable.

Seeking Community in an Increasingly Pay-to-Play Society

• How can we recognize loneliness in others and help introduce them to like-minded people?
• Instagram is the modern-day calling card—publicly displaying activity while increasing FOMO (inspired by Derek Thompson’s article Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out in The Atlantic).
• The decline of free/low-cost communal spaces vs. the rise of exclusive membership-based communities leaves society in a “messy middle” of unpacking individualism, capitalism, and the soft skills needed to build authentic relationships.

Join the Conversation!

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you love Table Pancakes, rate, review, and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform! Your support helps us grow.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What We Cover:

Finding Comfort (or Inconvenience) in Third Places

• The rise of membership clubs as built-in communities—but at a cost (inspired by The Stanza Podcast episode Exclusivity Sells featuring Annabel Schwartz).
• The pandemic, economic shifts, and changing priorities have redefined where (and how) we spend our time, money, and energy.
• The role of social media in shaping restaurant culture—creating both friction and rare, exceptional dining experiences.

Overcoming Strange Places and Unfamiliar Faces

• The search for “Cheers” spots that feel like home, with a low barrier to entry for meeting people.
• Finding common ground (hobbies, interests, goals) when navigating new spaces and social circles.

Balancing Fringe Friends and Solo Time

• Juggling the need for alone time with maintaining casual friendships (inspired by Business Insider’s America Is Facing a ‘Fringe Friend’ Crisis by Juliana Kaplan).
• Adapting to a world where more people live far from family, making friendships and chosen communities more critical than ever.

Join the Conversation!

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you love Table Pancakes, rate, review, and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform! Your support helps us grow.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What We Cover:

Friendships as We Get Older – Why deepening connections and communicating openly matter more than ever. We discuss grief, accountability, and understanding our place in each other’s support systems (with references to Good Grief by Dan Levy and conversations from Talk Easy with Sam Fragoso and We Can Do Hard Things).

Embracing Different Life Paths – Leading with curiosity, honoring our unique journeys, and staying committed to friendships even when life takes us in different directions (inspired by FWD; Joy and Everything Happens podcast with Vivek Murthy & Jon Scheyer).

Diving Into Dating (Sort of?) – Why do we want our friends to be just as excited about our passions as they are about romantic relationships? Plus, exploring the role of neutrality, reading the room, and truly meeting people where they are.

Celebrating Self-Love – The power of setting boundaries, pursuing dreams, practicing patience, and fully believing in yourself as an act of love.

Join the Conversation!

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you love Table Pancakes, rate, review, and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform! Your support helps us grow.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Topics We Cover:

• Social Media & Staying in Touch – The best platforms for keeping up with friends, from Instagram's Close Friends to TikTok’s curated reposts and the chaos of Twitter/X.  
• Managing Texts & Group Chats – How to handle incoming messages, group chats, and the delicate balance between quick replies and thoughtful responses (inspired by the New York Times article, How Group Chats Rule the World).  
• Phone Calls, Voice Notes, and FaceTime: The significance of hearing and seeing loved ones and how real-time communication provides a fuller picture of someone’s life.  
• The Art of Dropping By – Whether in person or through a spontaneous check-in, we explore the importance of being there for others—even in small ways.

Join the Conversation!

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you loved this episode, rate, review, and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform! Your support means the world.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Topics We Cover:

• Friend Group Dynamics – The different personalities that make up our circles and what makes each friendship unique.
• Groups vs. 1:1 Hangs: Do we prefer intimate one-on-one conversations or the energy of a big group? We share personal experiences and discuss the pros and cons of each.
• Social Needs & Differences – How we navigate friendships as introverts vs. extroverts and find balance in our social lives.
• Merging Friend Groups: Yes or No? – Should you introduce your friends to each other, or is it better to keep circles separate? We discuss the challenges and benefits of blending friendships.

Join the Conversation!

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you loved this episode, rate, review, and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform! Your support helps us grow. 🍽️💛

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Join hosts Katherine and Shelbi as they explore friendship, connection, and the stories that shape us. From navigating adulthood to redefining relationships, Table Pancakes serves up thought-provoking discussions with a side of humor and heart.

In Our First Episode, We Cover:

• How We Became Friends – The unexpected encounters and "third places" that brought us together.
• The Meaning Behind Table Pancakes – Why this quirky title perfectly represents the essence of our podcast.
• The Power of Deep Conversations – In a fast-paced world, we discuss the importance of quiet spaces and meaningful dialogue.
• What’s Coming Next – A sneak peek into future episodes, covering everything from friendships in adulthood to evolving relationships with parents and dating.

Join the Conversation!

Email us: tablepancakespod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @tablepancakespod

Connect with us: @shelbihq | @katherinehfoster

If you love Table Pancakes, please rate, review, and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform. Your support helps us grow and reach more listeners.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.