The Boys Read The Bible

God and Brooke Teach Us How To Party (Lev: 23-24)

Sun, 30 Nov 2025 15:00:00 GMT

SORRY FOR BROOKE'S AUDIO I can't fix it. Hopefully she's audible enough.

There are about 15 minutes of banter at the beginning of this episode, so if you don't want to hear us chit chat for two long, skip it.

We talk about partying, how to do it, how not to do it, what to eat when you do it, when to do it, why to do it, who to do it with, and what to kill at the party. We discuss lunar calendars, why you should always have a themed party, and how charitable donating raw materials to the homeless actually is. We speculate on Taylor Swift's sexuality, the nature of love and hate, and how bad stoning is.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Indu, Brooke

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Real Kingdom Is The Friendships We Made (Lev: 20-22)

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 15:00:00 GMT

I am so sorry, but in the last episode we forgot to read Leviticus Chapter 20, so I read it quickly at the beginning for those of you that still refuse to obtain your own Bible. Luckily, it is basically the same content of Chapters 18 and 19, so the discussion would have been redundant anyways,

We are losing steam slowly on reading lots and lots and lots of laws and cover everything from ableism to interest rates. Some of the laws are boring, some of them are disagreeable with our modern morality, and some of them are both. God sends those who break the laws to... We aren't sure yet.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Noah

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Birds and The Gay Bees (Lev: 18-19)

Sun, 16 Nov 2025 15:00:00 GMT

On this episode, we discuss all of the sexual acts god finds disgusting, and we discuss how creative they are and the merits of a society that lacks those acts. We also briefly touch on one of the more politically relevant verses of the Bible, the infamous Leviticus 18:22. Luke from the future gives better prepared notes on how this verse can be interpreted differently and provides a few resources for those of you who care enough to go Google about why Bible nerds argue about this. Nic Fails to hypothetically defend Moloch. We go off on a tangent about every time someone lied in the Bible and went unpunished.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Keith

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

More Laws More Laws and Azazel (Lev: 16-17)

Sun, 09 Nov 2025 15:00:00 GMT

We get a demon name drop (Azazel), we discuss more sacrifice options, and general rules as to how to be a good boy or gal. I am so, so sorry for you listeners, I promise it gets better.

Guests: Alex, Keith, Luke

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Bodily Discharge Laws (Lev: 14-15)

Sun, 05 Oct 2025 14:00:00 GMT

More skin disease, more cleansing, more sickness, still no guests. Us three men get to the bottom of misogyny (we solve it) and also if periods are gross or not. We read a lot about just about every unclean thing that could be ejected from a man or woman's body.

Guests: Alex, Nic, Luke

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sexist Antinatalism (Lev: 12-13)

Sun, 28 Sep 2025 14:00:00 GMT

1984 sucks, its a bad book, we get it, authoritarianism bad. We discuss leper colonies, how to treat it, and also how birth is maybe a sin. No guests because we don't have friends.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God Is An Octopus Man (Lev:10-11)

Sun, 06 Apr 2025 07:07:00 GMT

Aaron's sons use some unauthorized, strange fire, and get in very big trouble with both God and Moses. The Bible does finally get good again, and we read a great story about some smiting and some priestly drama. We bash on winos for a while so sorry if you're a Barefoot enjoyer. We also talk about the entire list of kosher and unclean animals, and speculate on what animals would not be on the list.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Blood From Lobe To Toe (Lev:7-9)

Sun, 30 Mar 2025 07:07:00 GMT

We read ALOT, and it drains much of our enthusiasm. We are trying to power through these repeat laws for your sake and ours. We cover more sacrificing, more blood spraying and more offerings. We spend a large portion of the last ten minutes speculating on how to perform a "scientific" animal sacrifice ourselves.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We Bite Off More Than We Can Chew (Lev:6)

Sun, 23 Mar 2025 07:07:00 GMT

Tbh I edited this a while ago so I don't really remember what happens. I think it's more sacrificing. Also we try to dip our toes into the Talmud but it doesn't go well. We are very sorry for reading so little of the actual Bible this episode.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Blood Sacrifices, The Cost of Doing Business (Lev:4-5)

Sun, 16 Mar 2025 14:00:00 GMT

We get into the nitty gritty of killing bulls and rams to cleanse the people of their sacrifices, and Luke spoils some of the events of the New Testament so that everyone has a more holistic context for blood sacrifice.

Guests:

Alex

Luke

Nic

Brooke

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Leviticus! (Lev:1-3)

Sun, 09 Mar 2025 14:00:00 GMT

We dive into the third book of the Bible. We are back from break. Again.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The End of Exodus (The Most Boring Chapters Yet)

Sun, 27 Oct 2024 14:00:55 GMT

Alex and Nic appoint Luke chairman of obfuscation, and we proceed to power through every single detail regarding the construction of the tabernacle as it is repeated for Moses' new plates. Part of the way through, we all take a deep breath and decide to save you all from another episode of Ikea instructions and read FOUR WHOLE CHAPTERS in one episode. You're welcome.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God Establishes Agressive Foreign Policy

Sun, 20 Oct 2024 14:00:04 GMT

Exodus: Chapter 34-35 -

God lays down more laws to replace the ones that Moses broke, and he has a rant about how awesome he is. We speculate on the feasibility of removing gold from the human body after it has been consumed. We talk a bit more about the two author hypothesis, and relate our opinions about reading some portions of the Bible as metaphor and some literally.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Morgan

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Golden Calf

Sun, 13 Oct 2024 14:00:10 GMT

Exodus: Chapter 32-33 -

Moses comes down from the mountain to absolute mayhem in the form of idol worship. God gets really mad, and Moses talks him down from starting from zero again with a bit of decimation instead. Aaron avoids accountability by the hem of his ephod, and we discuss ancient cow worship.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Hannah

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Aaron's Special Incense Recipes

Sun, 06 Oct 2024 14:00:44 GMT

Exodus: Chapter 30-31 -

I'm sorry folks but this is a particularly off topic episode. We do cover two chapters, but we did this episode after a bit of a break so we aren't in the flow and just jibber jabber about nonsense for a large portion. We read about biblical taxes and incense laws, so if you decide you can't bear to sift through our chit-chat, you aren't missing much. Also, Bibles are basically free, so go get one and read it yourself.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God Gets Metal

Sun, 29 Sep 2024 14:00:05 GMT

Exodus: Chapter 29 -

We read about lots of animal sacrifices, what to do with their insides, and question if any of it is really necessary considering the binding of Issac. God instructs Aaron and the blood boys to spray viscera, blood and organs all over his fancy new tent so that nobody needs to worry about sins. Daniel thinks God might have been an early 80's metal fan.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Daniel, Kenny

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The High Priests Get Crystal Drip

Sun, 22 Sep 2024 14:00:02 GMT

Exodus: Chapter 28 -

If you were hoping for more gold, there's lots more gold. Aaron and his blood boys get ephods, blue cords and breastplates adorned with crystals. We talk alot about crystals and crystal magic, because God is very interested in using them to symbolize the twelve tribes. If you or someone you love knows lots about crystals, tell them we want them to come on and tell us what they know, otherwise we will continue to read things off people's crystal blogs without citations.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God Sends Down Tabernacle Ikea Instructions

Sun, 15 Sep 2024 14:00:13 GMT

Exodus: Chapter 25-27

God has something against dolphins, and we read a lot of instructions on how to build a very gold, very brass, very dolphin skinned tabernacle. There are more sacrifice instructions, and the Israelites have a lot of work cut out for them, because this tent is going to be many talents heavy. Alex pontificates on how much he can empathize with godhood, and we critique God's garish interior design decisions.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

System of An Alex

Sun, 08 Sep 2024 19:46:45 GMT

Exodus: Chapter 23-24

Welcome to Alex, don't forget to like that like button and smash that bell. Alex reads Alex, and we discuss unlevened bread, murder, some other laws, and we think some are good and some are bad. Also, David comes on for his first episode (late). Also God calls for six genocides and shows off his feet.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, David, Daniel, Max

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Slave Laws & Goring Oxen

Sun, 18 Aug 2024 14:00:09 GMT

This one goes out to women. Welcome to tall talk. Luke rambles about Nextdoor drama (that he incited), and we read about property law, which includes humans as much as it does inanimate objects. There are a few cool laws in this section that we will put the TBRTB seal of approval on, such as Exodus 21:28 and Exodus 22:26.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The (Ten) Commandments

Sun, 11 Aug 2024 13:06:01 GMT

The Ten Commandments! The big rules! We finally get to find out what God's top ten priorities are, and he comes all the way down to Earth (Mt. Sinai) to do it. He's got some weird rules for it, but Moses and his people navigate it effectively. Sorry Luke talks a lot on this one, there's a lot of info dumping to get through (ten commandments and all that) and Alex and Nic don't carry their weight.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jethro Teaches Moses How To Do Theocracy

Sun, 04 Aug 2024 13:00:57 GMT

We pick up with the gang in the desert, no longer hungry but still very thirsty. Moses cajoles water from a rock, and his father in law teaches him how to organize his phrophet-hood into an actual government and religion by establishing a middle management. Also, Alex publicly apologizes to our past guests for an unknown reason.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God Feeds His People Mana

Sun, 28 Jul 2024 13:00:47 GMT

We speculate on all things mana; where it is from, what it tastes like, what it could be and if we would be happy or grossed out by it. Noah recites Miriam's death metal classic, and we begin our journey out into the desert.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic, Noah

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Parting of The Red Sea

Sun, 21 Jul 2024 13:00:16 GMT

We get to a big milestone in the Bible, the story of the parting of the Red Sea. We get a glimpse into God's military strategy, and get a theophany with a bonus angel. We discuss the terror of God for the first time in a while, and some of the more minor details often glossed over in the story of the Red Sea crossing.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic, Daniel, Max

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Bood Rituals, Yeast and Infanticide

Sun, 14 Jul 2024 13:00:55 GMT

We celebrate Passover, as the Israelites finally manage to escape slavery with the help of God's divine hand. God lays out some dietary restrictions, and a few ideas for a holiday he wants his people to start celebrating. Noah and Nic take over reading on this episode to prove they have Bibles and can read.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic, Noah

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We Do Moses' Star Chart

Sun, 14 Jul 2024 04:19:54 GMT

This episode is cut short because Alex had plans at 9, so if you were hoping for your allotted 1 hour of rambling you can play this on half speed. We only read one chapter as a result, but its still a good one, and its two more plagues, if anyone thought it couldn't get worse.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic, Erika

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Frogs Frogs Frogs Frogs Frogs Frogs Frogs Frogs Frogs

Sun, 14 Jul 2024 04:19:02 GMT

EDIT: I had to reupload this episode because of some technical issues. The last one was for some reason only 30 minutes, so if you listened to that already, sorry, now you can relisten to it.

We talk about frogs and fleas. Daniel joins us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Moses Begins His Ten Part Act

Sat, 25 Nov 2023 15:00:38 GMT

I would have named this episode something else based on the unanimous thematic take-away discussed towards the end, but I am not allowed to. We sadly have to read some begats, but Alex takes some shortcuts to avoid most of it for you all. Max's recording drops very early in the episode, so I tried to cut in such a way that it isn't super weird for us to be talking to an invisible voice. Moses begins the ten plagues of Egypt, involving snakes and blood.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Max

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Moses Gets Recruited by An Abolitionist Bush

Sat, 18 Nov 2023 15:00:42 GMT

We read the story of Moses and the burning bush, and obviously talk about all of the various interpretations that go along with "talking to a burning bush". We read more receipts, and Moses gets recruited to lead a slave revolt. We are sadly not joined by any guests. If you want to be one email us. Also God tries to kill Moses???

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We Read The Dramatic Novelization of The Prince of Egypt

Sun, 12 Nov 2023 15:00:37 GMT

We talk about midwives for way too long on this episode and fall into a googling hole. More importantly, we finally start the second book of the bible, Exodus, and Luke does an extremely long powerpoint presentation that only the guests can see (sorry audience) about what to expect in Exodus and what kind of historical context to include in our expectations for the book. We are joined by Cassidy, our original number 1 fan and early guest for the christening of a new book of the bible.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Cassidy

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The End of The Beginning

Sun, 05 Nov 2023 15:00:39 GMT

We finally finish the book of Genesis. You probably didn't think we would, but we did it to spite each other and our audience. We say goodbye one last time to a few more favorites, and we attempt to decipher the sometimes vague and sometimes extremely benign prophecies of Israel. Lee has a difficult time staying on the call, and I summarize the entire first book of the bible for you all at a super human speed.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Lee

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Bible IS Anime

Sun, 29 Oct 2023 15:00:17 GMT

A lot of people die, and Joe's master plan (maybe?) goes through without a hitch, as it always does for him. Blessings are transfered through family members in a confusing and extremely specific fashion. Alex is not here for this episode and we also had technical difficulties in the beginning, so if it sounds like we'd been chatting for a bit at the top of the episode, its because we were. The cut is right before Angelo makes the fig comment. Don't worry though we didn't read any bible without you. Angelo is looking for descendants so if you're interested leave a review.

Guests: Luke, Nic, Angelo

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God's Plan is Joseph's Plot Armor

Sun, 22 Oct 2023 15:00:51 GMT

This episode is riddled with technical issues. Alex's audio is spotty because his original recording didn't upload so I had to use our backup, and Noah's call drops half way through from the recording. If the conversation sounds weird, it's because I tried to edit out any portions where we were talking to people who's audio failed to record, and I tried to mark sections where that occurs so it's less confusing!

Joseph boldly claims the title of Egypt's ruler, and also justifies the terrible things he went through to help god save some people from a famine. There are also more begets and a family reunion. We cry at the end.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Noah

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Alex Clears Out The Bazaar

Mon, 16 Oct 2023 04:21:05 GMT

It is still about Joe, and he is still gaslighting his siblings - which we do tire of, but Ben points out that in Joseph's defense he was sold into slavery so he can have a little bit of gaslighting as a treat. Also, Alex and Nic share their own dreams for interpretation and Ben touches a Bible for the first time in his life.

Sorry if Ben is quiet and my audio is weird, we shared a microphone and he's soft spoken and I am loud so just listen extra hard for him. I tried to make him more audible when he speaks amidst the blistering shouts of Nic and Luke.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Ben

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Absolute King of Gaslight Summer

Mon, 09 Oct 2023 00:30:34 GMT

Joseph is at long last reunited with his brothers that tried to kill him and sell him into slavery. He spends the entire family reunion lying to them about his identity and their innocence in an extremely dramatic fashion, but who wouldn't after what they did.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Indu, New Nick

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Luck is Found in A Foreign Gas Station

Sun, 01 Oct 2023 22:02:23 GMT

Joseph institutes agricultural planning practices in Egypt, something that they probably should have instituted earlier, and gets in tight with pharaoh and his sun stuff.

Also, I am sorry for the wildly inconsistent audio volume between episodes, I just sat back down to edit the episode backlog for the first time in a while and I have no idea what the right volume is right now. Also there are now ads and I haven't figured out how to remove or vet them, so sorry if we accidentally sponsor something terrible.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Max, Noah

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Joe-matria and Dream Reading

Sun, 24 Sep 2023 21:55:59 GMT

We follow our new favorite main character Joseph, or as Ana insists on calling him, Joe, as he snakes his way out of a handful of sticky situations. Joe leverages an assault allegation to move himself from slave to the head of the Egyptian department of agriculture in a few short years, with his own wits and also probably a lot of help from God.

Guests: Alex, Luke, Nic, Ana

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Queer-baiting and Costco

Sun, 09 Oct 2022 21:39:02 GMT

On this episode we begin the story of Joseph, his coat and his terrible brothers. We are joined by Ana and Matt. I don't really remember what happens in this episode I edited it weeks ago and am just now publishing it.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic, Ana and Matt

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Snippening of Shechem

Sun, 02 Oct 2022 21:15:12 GMT

On this episode we read Genesis 34 and 35, and discuss the geopolitical climate of the promised land. Levi and Simeon do some terrible things to some other people who also did terrible things, and Alex launches his search engine. Also, nose rings are ok with God.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jacob Wrestles With God (God Cheats)

Mon, 26 Sep 2022 05:47:12 GMT

In this week's episode, we hit a big landmark in the Bible, that being the birth (kind of) of Israel. A strong case is made for God entering the wrestling hall of fame, and lots of livestock-related math is done.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This Stack of Rocks As My Witness

Mon, 19 Sep 2022 01:24:21 GMT

Laban and Jacob have a "confrontation" regarding Jacob's "theft" and there is a brief discussion of male and female familial hierarchy and the nature of household gods. Payton is entirely missing in this episode, the reason is still unknown and he spills a comically large amount of Cheerios. Lee relearns how to read a bible.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic, Lee, Technically Payton

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Leah Has a Great Personality

Sun, 11 Sep 2022 19:19:32 GMT

Jacob works on his uncle's ranch for 7 years to earn his cousin's wife, Rachel, and eventually earns a wife, but not the right wife. There's a bit of a baby-making competition, and Jacob scams Laban out of a lot of sheep, somehow, possibly through genetics.

Guests: Luke, Alex, Nic, Noah, Payton

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jacob's Ladder/Staircase

Thu, 07 Jul 2022 20:30:30 GMT

Half of this episode is a discussion of the story of Jacob and Esau from the last chapter with some examples of how the story might be used in a sermon, as well as Haley's gender studies-ish interpretation. The Second half is the story of Jacob's Ladder, a brief but iconic Bible story. We also get a bit into chapter 29, for those listeners that are trying not to get confused as t where we are.

Going to try and start listing episode guests down here.

Alex, Luke, Nic, Haley

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jacob Gets The Bag At All Cost

Thu, 07 Jul 2022 18:47:45 GMT

We read the story of Issac, Jacob, and Esau with this week's guest, Haley. We discuss the questionable ethics of Jacob and his mother's plan to rob the eldest of birthright, and what that implies for Jewish and Christian tradition. The story is a literarily famous one, and we break down the symbolism and character motivations actually found within the text rather than the mythos and assumed narrative that tends to orbit it. We also request from the Bible that there be zanier costume swaps.

I have gotten lazier with editing the cover photos for each of these episodes because it takes too much time.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Enchanted Nut

Mon, 18 Apr 2022 01:05:46 GMT

We jump back into the Bible with Luke's new roommate, Ryan, to discuss Abraham's number one wingman and his quest to get Issac laid. We say goodbye to some important characters, say hello to some new ones, and admittedly read one of the less interesting stories in the Bible but only out of narrative necessity. The audio quality takes a brief but severe dip due to the group transitioning to a remote recording situation, but we will return to our usual audio mediocrity soon.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Binding of Issac

Mon, 21 Jun 2021 20:47:40 GMT

God asks Abraham to sacrifice the son God just gave him, and we talk about wether or not God is allowed to pull a takesy-backsey of such monumental proportions. There are water rights disputes in the land of Abimelech, and Hagar gets kicked out again. The episode stays brief for the first time in a while, and the narrative of Abraham returns to some of the symbolic gestures of weirdly abusive but also inspiring love we all know the Bible for.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sodom and Gomorrah: Pride Month Special

Fri, 11 Jun 2021 00:35:50 GMT

We read the destruction of Sodom and wonder more than once about why Gomorrah is a part of all this with the largest, most difficult to edit group to date. Angel's are groped, air fryers contentious, a mortal speaks reason into the ears of a now canonically mind-reading deity, and Lot gets drugged by his daughters. We speculate the archeological location of the gayest city on Earth and come home to Albuquerque, New Mexico to meet a hometown hero Steven Collins in his search for sodomy.

There's a lot more editing in this episode, and if everyone is into it I'll keep it around and hone it down.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Slaves and Sad Elephants

Wed, 02 Jun 2021 17:20:16 GMT

Abram and Sarai take a summer trip through Saudi Arabia, win a war against a 4 kings, try cuckolding in their relationship twice, and cut off foreskins at ninety. We cover a lot of ground in a very short amount of time with much of it taken up by Jackie insisting on the repugnance of uncircumcised genitals. God makes a lot of promises to Abram and his wife and adapts quickly to unexpected slave children as we make our way to the not at all spoiled events of Sodom and Gommorah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God's Got Jokes

Sat, 29 May 2021 21:16:56 GMT

God gets staunchly anti-globalist and we discuss his not quite destruction of The Tower of Babel, a very real structure with very uncertain historical descriptions. Sumerian gods intermingle with the Genesis narrative once again and the Bible explains the origin of different cultures and languages a second time. Noah puts on his tinfoil hat as we finally discuss his long awaited nemesis, Ba'al.

DISCLAIMER: There were some issues with Andrew Baker's microphone at the beginning of the episode, it seemed to be working up until he starts talking and cuts out again. He's either inaudible or quiet up until the end of the episode where it seems to work a bit more consistently.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God Wins Us Back With A Rainbow

Tue, 01 Sep 2020 19:03:21 GMT

We cover chapter 9 of Genesis again, after a Covid related hiatus and break in some new recording equipment we got for the podcast. We cover the story of Noah's nakedness, and the introductory information for The Table of Nations in the next chapter. Also Haley is surprised by why Christians love rainbows.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Vedas Aren't Wet Enough

Sun, 30 Aug 2020 23:49:10 GMT

We talk about the first genocide and covenant of the Bible, the story of Noah's Flood. We compare and contrast it with other ancient tales of global or regional deluges, and discuss the literary and theological implications of a God that fixes his own mistakes. The episode includes Noah, Alex, Luke, James, and Kelly, and covers chapters 6 through 8 of Genesis, with a toe dip into 9 for the sake of context.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Too Many Lamechs

Sun, 30 Aug 2020 00:08:26 GMT

Cain and Abel have a disagreement, and humans start showing up out of nowhere. We attempt to clarify the lineage trees set up in both Chapter 4 and 5 for clarity's sake, but likely make it more confusing, and leave off just before the great flood.

Also we're back-ish from hiatus.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Coercion, Sex, Nudity and Apples

Fri, 06 Mar 2020 23:29:41 GMT

Adam and Eve commit original sin, resulting in free will, clothing, and misogynist undertones. We discuss functional definitions of God in relation to Harry Potter, and attempt to get to the bottom of the apple related blame game between the humans, god and the snake.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

God Steals a Man's Organs

Thu, 27 Feb 2020 19:51:03 GMT

The gang gets feminist as we discuss Lilith, Adam's first evil seductress wife. God is calculated to be only four times more powerful than Noah, and Gilgamesh has his first crossover episode with the Bible.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Asexual Bacteria is Post God

Thu, 20 Feb 2020 20:11:12 GMT

We discuss the sky roof, the vegetarian implications of Genesis 1, and whether or not weeds are God approved. Alex, Luke, Haley, and Lee.

DISCLAIMER: If you are starting here with this podcast, STOP. I strongly recommend starting in Exodus. Early episodes have terrible audio quality, terrible analysis and are way too long. If you insist on starting in Genesis, start a bit in around episode 10. Maybe some day if you really want to know what happened in Genesis, come back here. But seriously, the quality of audio and content is terrible.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.