Traumatized Motherfuckers

Bonus! The Lying Flat Lifestyle

Tue, 24 Feb 2026 14:33:27 GMT

Have you heard of the cultural movement of chosen inanimation? How does it relate to life satisfaction? And at how many points does the societal gaslighting enter scene?

Special Tuesday Bonus for all!

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Dating in Dystopia 01 | dope fiends; emo-masturbation & the end of dates

Fri, 13 Feb 2026 17:41:05 GMT

( a neurobehavioral take on attachment and relationship deprioritization )

Dating at the end of times [as we knew them] comes with added risks; D-strings, fantastical addictions, 'type' baggage, and the de-emphasis of real relationships no matter how your attachment swings. What goes wrong when we chronically self-stimulate, becoming reliant on that sweet D?

Come check out the rest of the story

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Something like Humanity (the reemergence of)

Fri, 06 Feb 2026 21:25:54 GMT

We don't oft go looking for brighsides. But sometimes the contrast points them out.

Let's have an easy chat about finding light in the times

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6.1 Time Turrors and Disturtions (A Month of Fear-Work)

Fri, 30 Jan 2026 05:00:00 GMT

A month full of dealing with fear and determining who to be. In this release from the patreon stream, we talk about the terrors of time when you have a traumatized brain. Inconsistency, lapses, wormholes and sandtraps... we live in temporal funhouses. Let's talk about how an unstandard relationship with time affects our relationships and what to do about it.

Video!

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Time Turrors & Disturtions

Fri, 23 Jan 2026 15:36:10 GMT

We've touched on it before, but there wasn't enough... time. Today we discuss the many ways that trauma distorts time experiences, destabilizing the beholder and throwing them on an alternative itmeline from the rest of the world. Why do we fear time? Let's count the reasons. Then we talk about the annoying, "we fucking know," way to reset your time relationship, find abundant time resources, and to start moving with your own inner pacekeeper for a more self-collected lifestyle.

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Dark Arts: Fear for Light

Fri, 16 Jan 2026 17:18:36 GMT

Watch this video! Bask in the love effort.

TW. Fact: going into the darkness makes the light re-accessible. Let's have a holistic episode.

first scary show

second scary show

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Escalations

Fri, 09 Jan 2026 16:50:05 GMT

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Showin Face - The Personal Episode of 2025

Tue, 30 Dec 2025 12:02:00 GMT

VIDEO!

VIDEO (YOUTUBE)!

This year I said we were getting personal. Then we didn't.

Let's do it today with a video episode of my motherfucking face that took 2 weeks to upload.

A wildfire, three moves, no internet, 3-5 jobs atta time... It's been a year.

And it's ending with an unexpected family repair & a return to Dating. In Dystopia.

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Year End Reflection; Four Quarterly Trends

Tue, 30 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

How about a trend-spotting approach to reflecting on the year? Let's make sense of all the details by collecting them into piles of intention.

Share your Qs if you dare.

🧨 And HAPPY NEW YEAR! 🧨

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Five Tips for Resolving Rumination

Fri, 12 Dec 2025 11:24:00 GMT

Rumination isn't only an annoyance, it's a predisposing factor for psychopathology. Here are 5 research-backed tips for changing the chronic thought pattern.

summary

In this ep we talk about practical strategies for managing cyclical thoughts. The discussion emphasizes the importance of visualization techniques, cognitive restructuring, and unfortunately self-acceptance, to break the torture of continual negative thinking. We provide actionable tips to help navigate ruminatory patterns and foster a chronically healthier mindset.

takeaways

Rumination is linked to trauma, anxiety, and depression.
Setting a timer for ruminating thoughts can reinforce them through ironic control processes.
Visualizing to create your own inhibitory signal can help interrupt negative thought patterns.
Mapping the brain's rumintory circuit and tracking inner expeirence through it can aid in managing rumination.
Re-calibrating obsessive view of one event within the context of an entire existence can shift attention.
Avoid thinking about personal memories or predictions before bed to prevent insomnia.
Using "cognitive bridges" can help connect conflicting thoughts so the mind can hold both.
Self-forgiveness and esteem are (unfortunately) crucial for overcoming ruminatory thinking.
A realistic lens assists with rumination: Life is unpredictable, and we have limited control over events.

keywords

rumination, mental health, anxiety, cognitive control, self-acceptance, coping strategies, visualization, brain circuits, insomnia, self-forgiveness

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Cog Dep Bonus! Depression Contagion and Helping Yourself Through the Holidays

Thu, 27 Nov 2025 11:00:00 GMT

Happy Holidays! (Hopefully)

This conversation explores the groundbreaking research on contagious depression, focusing on the establishment of an animal model to study its mechanisms and effects. The discussion highlights the implications of psychiatric illnesses spreading through social interactions, particularly within familial and friendship circles. The findings reveal that healthy rats can exhibit depressive behaviors after cohabiting with depressed counterparts, marking a significant advancement in understanding mental health contagion.

Video!

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Pub ep 5.11! Cognitive Basis of Depression Summary

Wed, 26 Nov 2025 09:24:00 GMT

'Stop seeing everything so negatively." they say. But the cognitive behaviors underlying depression don't allow it. Let's talk about mental reactions and sticky patterns that outweigh false brightsides.

Video!

Workbook!

Course!

summary

This conversation delves into the cognitive basis of depression, focusing on how neural networks, memory games, language, cognitive inhibition inhibition, outdated working memory, and rumination contribute to depressive states. It explores the mechanisms behind cognitive depression, compassionate views for the state of human suffering, and offers strategies for managing depression through attention training and environmental changes.

takeaways

Neural networks, schemas, and representations automatically shape our understanding of experiences.
Even singular stimulation events can activate depressive schemas, limiting potential perceptions.
Memory biases in depression lead to a resonating focus on negative experiences.
Over generalized and explicit memories are unique experiences associated with depression.
Cognitive inhibition is ironically inhibited during depression.
Working memory cannot update with relevant material under depressive spells.
Emotional regulation is hindered by cognitive control loss in depression.
Rumination causes or exacerbates depression, anxiety, and PTSD due to a negative focus on the self.
Automatic reckoning with the human condition may be the cause of many varieties of cognitive disorders.
Training attention can redirect focus away from negativity.
Ambiguous or negative social environments spark rumination which leads to depression.
Changing environments and behaviors can help disrupt negative neural networks.
Understanding the cognitive processes behind depression can bolster compassion and help deactivate negative schemas.

keywords

cognitive depression, memory bias, cognitive inhibition, working memory, overgeneralized memory, semantic memory, rumination, emotional regulation, reappraisal, self-doubt, neural networks

Come check the full story at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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5.10 Pub Ep! Back to High School: Secret Sources of Peer Pressure in the 2020s

Thu, 30 Oct 2025 04:00:00 GMT

"Peer Pressure is a high school problem." Or is it? Let's talk about adult brains drunk on social influence through the illusions and purposeful manipulations of the internet.

Video!

Course!

summary

The conversation explores the pervasive effects of internet influence and peer pressure on society, highlighting how these factors have radicalized identities and impacted human psychology. Algorithms are particularly implicated as the highly corruptive "third party affiliations" that we don't directly choose, which then keep us locked within social groups and cliques. The human need to conform for safety yet also establish a unique identity within the constraints of that similarity is driving personalities to aggressive extremes.

takeaways

The same factors that promote peer pressure in adolescence are being experienced by adults on the internet.
PP has become an age indiscriminate phenomenon that has radicalized identities and contributed to ruining the world by hijacking human psychology.
The internet has returned us all to a high school social experience of self-definition and seeking identity options.
Popular figures are especially influential due to illusion of proximity and desire for similar social reward.
Conformity is required to remain within social groups, often necessitating "third party affiliations" to stay aligned.
One-on-one relationships value authenticity; clique relationships value similarity of behavior.
Algorithms force us into designated groups, which then corrupt the mind to conform without conscious decision.
Mechanized manipulation has taken over the human species, from the top-down.
The social brain is programmed to conform yet also establish a unique identity - driving group ideals to new extremes as a personal brand.

keywords

social influence, peer pressure, identity, psychology, societal change, social aggression, algorithms, manipulation, mind control, identity corruption, group think

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Pub Pod 5.9 Costs of Impression Management

Tue, 30 Sep 2025 08:00:00 GMT

If Facades of Conformity feel a bit much, how about Impression Management strategies? Let's talk about common strategies, the risks vs. rewards, and negative return on energetic investments.

VIDEO FORM

Course form!

summary

This conversation delves into the themes of conformity and impression management, exploring how individuals often sacrifice their true selves to fit societal expectations. It discusses the psychological implications of these behaviors, including increased loneliness and decreased life satisfaction, and highlights various strategies people use to manage their self-image. The conversation emphasizes the risks associated with these strategies and the long-term consequences of suppressing one's true identity.

takeaways

Impression management is a common behavior in social interactions.
It can lead to higher loneliness and lower life satisfaction.
People often feel pressured to conform to societal norms.
Impression management can be a double-edged sword, creating more problems than it solves.
Different strategies of impression management include ingratiating, self-promoting, and suppression.
Supplication can lower self-esteem and self-image.
Suppression can lead to emotional exhaustion and impaired relationships.
Authenticity is crucial for genuine connections.
The effort to manage impressions can be exhausting and counterproductive.
Creating environments of authenticity can improve overall well-being.

keywords

impression management, conformity, emotional welfare, social support, loneliness, self-image, authenticity, psychological health, social dynamics, coping strategies

As always, visit patreon.com, search traumatized motherfuckers for the whole story <3

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RSD pt 3: The Gen Z Stare & Global Disconnection

Fri, 25 Jul 2025 14:00:00 GMT

RSD and CPTSD = nutbuttah and jelly. But how prevalent is RSD REALLY? And how is the internet implicated?

In this conversation, we delve into the concept of Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) and its implications in societal dynamics. Technology and digital communication have altered social interactions, leading to increased feelings of risk, rejection, and defensive loneliness for all. Lat's chat about the shared experiences of rejection in the digital age.

takeaways

RSD is a significant issue in today's society.
Digital communication has changed how we perceive rejection.
Social skills are deteriorating due to online interactions.
Younger generations lack experience in face-to-face communication... and it's spreading upwards.
The pandemic exacerbated feelings of isolation and rejection.
All people are afraid to engage due to fear of rejection.
Aloofness in communication is becoming a self-protective trend.
Understanding RSD can help improve relationships & save the good parts of humanity.

keywords

Rejection Sensitivity, Digital Communication, Social Skills, Loneliness, Mental Health, Gen Z Stare, Interpersonal Relationships, Technology, Emotional Health, Online Culture, Isolation, Trauma, Depression, Lack of Community

Vid!

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The Caveat! How to actually use the OKAY! trick

Sat, 12 Jul 2025 17:17:35 GMT

Immediate interjection. This is the work necessary for acceptance before rapid attentional inhibition and shifting works. We're talkin the importance of understanding values and purpose. A bird's eye view can help detach from emotional triggers and maintain focus on real goals, rather than getting spun out in bullshit. First post: https://www.patreon.com/posts/133963915

takeaways

It's not easy to shrug off trauma without understanding.
Behavioral changes require clarity on goals and values.
Maintaining focus on what matters helps in decision-making.
A bird's eye view can provide clarity and reduce emotional reactivity.
No one can make you feel or act a certain way unless you allow it.
Defining your purpose is crucial for personal growth.
Practicing perspective-taking can enhance emotional regulation.
Life's challenges are often part of a larger narrative.
You have control over your reactions and behaviors.
Knowing what matters to you is essential for a fulfilling life.

keywords trauma, behavioral change, purpose, perspective, emotional regulation, self-awareness, mindfulness, personal growth

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A One Word Shortcut to Acceptance

Sat, 12 Jul 2025 13:29:17 GMT

We're here with a hot tip! First, discussing the concept of using the mantra 'let them' to foster acceptance of others' behaviors and decisions. Then... introducing the power of a single word as a tool for acknowledging reality and moving forward. Including a litany of personal anecdotes about adaptive behavioral change instead of fruitless fighting.

takeaways

Acceptance is key to adaptability.
The mantra 'let them' encourages autonomy.
Saying 'okay' helps acknowledge reality.
Behavioral change is a proactive response.
Non-acceptance leads to human suffering.
Self-advocacy is crucial in challenging situations.
Adjusting behavior can prevent emotional turmoil.
Personal experiences illustrate the power of acceptance.
Mindfulness helps in navigating life's challenges.
You can always change how you respond.

keywords adaptability, acceptance, behavioral change, self-advocacy, emotional autonomy, relationships, coping strategies, personal growth, mindfulness, resilience

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Acceptance and Commitment Training; The Environ-Mental Anxiety Solution

Tue, 08 Jul 2025 21:59:13 GMT

Exploring the complex relationship between anxiety, acceptance, and action. Acceptance is the first step in addressing anxiety; avoidance only leads to further problems. By accepting reality, individuals can mobilize their energy towards meaningful actions rather than being paralyzed by fear and dysfunction. Let's start making use of anxiety and creating change.

takeaways

Acceptance is the first step in dealing with anxiety.
Avoidance can lead to passive consent to harmful situations.
Anxiety can be a catalyst for positive action if approached correctly.
Self-compassion comes after acceptance, not before.
Acceptance is not the same as consent; it is acknowledging reality.
Mindfulness and present moment attention are crucial for acceptance.
Values clarification helps individuals identify what matters most to them.
Behavioral change is only possible after accepting reality.
Building local communities can empower individuals to take action together.

keywords anxiety, acceptance, self-compassion, mental health, emotional well-being, behavioral change, community action, psychological flexibility, acceptance commitment therapy, coping strategies

Video!

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Traum-meta-tized Motherfuckers: Insanity in Environments of Reality Avoidance

Sun, 06 Jul 2025 19:20:26 GMT

This fucker's gotta speak. Welcome to Traum-meta-tized MFs! Today we're talking the world burning vs. social spheres of delusion - explaining the inspiration for recent research episodes

Opt in/out of this podcast stream on patreon as needed <3

Hail collectively changing this world

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Anxiety vs. Cog Control BONUS & WRAPUP! Final Informations and Implications

Sat, 05 Jul 2025 17:06:27 GMT

I lied to you last time. There's an important caveat to our anxiety talk that must be revealed as we barrel towards our next topic: acceptance training.

VID

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5.6 Pub Ep! Environ-Mental Illness: Fear vs. Anxiety, Stress, Phobia, Paranoia

Sat, 28 Jun 2025 16:57:43 GMT

Video!

let's talk about environ mental illness, discussing how external stimuli and personal experiences contribute to psycho-emotional disruptions. Today, featuring a discussion emphasizing the importance of understanding anxiety, differentiating between various emotional states such as fear, stress, anxiety, phobia, and paranoia, and not being a dick to yourself on the other end.

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FEAR vs. Anxiety, Stress, Phobia, Paranoia

Sat, 14 Jun 2025 11:36:03 GMT

VIdeo

In difficult times, it can be a SLEW of all five. Let's explore the distinctions between fear, anxiety, stress, phobia, and paranoia. It's important to notice these differences to manage your responses effectively. Have a silly metaphor and game plan for dealing with your psychic-physical reactions to help with the effort.

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Intro: Environ-Mental Illness (SLEW)

Fri, 13 Jun 2025 10:58:12 GMT

Beyond genetic predispositions and past traumas, current environments play a significant role in shaping well-being. External stressors and societal factors contribute to mental health challenges. Don't get up your own ass about struggles and backslides; let's acknowledge circumstantial stressors and recognize their impact on our recovery efforts.

that video version

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BONUS BONUS! The Pitfalls of Corrective Experiences and Expectations??

Sat, 07 Jun 2025 21:20:05 GMT

Let's explore the concept of half- and fully-corrective experiences in the context of trauma and mental health. These experiences can help us heal and grow, but also have potential dangers of over-correction and toxic positivity. It's important to understand the complexities of personal growth and the impact of corrective experiences and expectations on one's ego.

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Preventing PTSD pt 5: Brief Summary of Behaviors

Thu, 29 May 2025 12:58:56 GMT

Let’s do a quick rundown of behaviors to prevent PTSD from the research we’ve done.

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Non-attachment, acceptance, and perspectives for boundary setting

Wed, 30 Apr 2025 18:26:37 GMT

A summary of trauma-habits that stand in the way of boundary setting? You got it, nerd. Quick n dirty.

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Nervous system indications of missing boundaries

Wed, 30 Apr 2025 17:33:00 GMT

To pull some eps together, here are 7 signs of a nervous system overextending itself in relationship.

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"For Everyone!" Less Fiery Advice to Guide Yourself in Stresstimes

Thu, 17 Apr 2025 18:12:49 GMT

Taking back the triggers - here's an edited version FOR ALL!

A helpful metaphor and some basic trauma-tending advice for every shituation. The brain can't always be trusted - that's when you need a higher perspective from a lower place.

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BONUS! Boundaries to allow compassionate, love, and self-existence

Thu, 20 Mar 2025 20:41:34 GMT

Compassion requires protection in the form of relationship-allowing boundaries. read: not relationship-ending rules. What are boundaries, how do we set them, and how do we make sure they're enacted? Talking inner and outer boundaries to separate their shit from yours, so love can exist.

Here's another high-input videaaaa

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self-love pt 7 not 7: COMPASSION THROUGHOUT

Sat, 15 Mar 2025 18:17:30 GMT

Time to bring this series home. Unfortunately, requiring the practice of self-compassion throughout. Talkin 7 signs that compassion has been lost and a guided 'what to do about it.'

TY for being a part of this evolving series

VIDEO (IT'S REALLY REALLY GOOD THIS TIME FR) come watch the finale!

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How Perspectives GIT Fucked; Trauma - Ego - Parenting BONUS

Sat, 22 Feb 2025 07:00:00 GMT

I have more to say than the last episode suggested. Why are t-perspectives wrongly sized? How do parental egos influence child egos and perspectives? Let's rap

VIDEYOOOO

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STRESS 2 (a less tr-fucked planet)

Sun, 19 Jan 2025 13:45:15 GMT

Another stress reminder for dense days. Don't forget to breathe.

VIDEYO

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The Default Mode Network | Self-limiting Beliefs Pt. II

Fri, 02 Sep 2022 17:00:13 GMT

Maybe my favorite episode. Let's integrate everything we've learned so far and introduce yer brain's Default Mode Network.

Time to get neurobiological, as we talk about Parts Battles and sensory subthreshold Hypervigilance tying into our states of perpetual self-limitation.

🧠✊

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BS-free "Self-limiting Beliefs" | Pt. I

Fri, 26 Aug 2022 12:00:38 GMT

So plenty of folks talk about self-limitations. But, ya know... not from a trauma lens, where those words have a whole other meaning and depth to them.

Today, let's start taking a MF scientific and traumalogical look at self-limiting beliefs as they relate to trauma, PTSD development, parts, and all persistent post-traumatic symptomology that just won't quit.

No, it's not random when you suddenly give up on yourself. No, it's not only you who feels helpess, unlovable, and worthless. No, it's not just the trauma or family experience that fucks you... actually, it's all the time and cognitive events afterwards.

This time, we start basic and work towards pulling in other connective trauma-research strings.

Next time, we'll talk about self-limitation becoming a "default mode," starting in your adaptive brain physiology. The default mode network.

🧠✊

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WRAP on Filial Obligation

Mon, 22 Aug 2022 13:47:15 GMT

Might be episode overkill, but I think we learned a lot. Let's pull all the academic and community-experiential research from the past few shows together! Here's what we learned this past month in a bite-sized portion.

Thanks again for your feedback and shares! If you've got anything to add to the CMNTY CoLAB conversastion, feel free to send it anytime! traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com

Filial Obligation Episode

https://www.patreon.com/posts/69787517

Relationship Development Video

https://www.patreon.com/posts/70110773

Suicidality and Perceived Entrapment Episode

https://www.patreon.com/posts/70111950

CMNTY CoLAB Episode

https://www.patreon.com/posts/70641011

🧠✊

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Video Audio: Relationships on a Loop

Fri, 05 Aug 2022 17:38:17 GMT

Dunno if it helps to hear without the video, but figured I'd do the work and let you tell me the answer.

Here's JUST THE AUDIO for the video that was released to everyone on Patreon! A short summary of what we covered last week.

Let me know if it helps or helps no one without seeing my whiteboard.

Check the video at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers released TODAY! <3

🧠✊

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Caregiving Anxiety and Obligation in Relationships | Pt I. Origins

Sat, 30 Jul 2022 11:09:37 GMT

Is relationship drain and strain your recurrent pattern? Exhausted, exasperated, and anxious all the time? How much of that comes from sense of obligation, constant caregiving, and anxiety about your capacity to endlessly provide both?

Today, we're talking about the filial anxiety and obligation that come from - especially - post-traumatic parents. How do we feel obliged to our families in their roughest times, and how does that affect us over time? Plus, let's get thinking about the transmission of those reverse-caregiving dynamics from our parents... to every other relationship in life. Spot the patterns, understand their origins.

If you're continually in a "fixer or fawner" position this is a series for you.

And don't forget to hit up the Patreon for the research article behind this post!

"Worthy of your attention," Organization of the Week: House of Cherith

"Safe housing and supportive services where women can recover from the trauma of sexual exploitation. While tremendous efforts have been made to raise awareness and eradicate modern-day sex trafficking, there remains a major shortage of supportive services designed for survivors. Our focus is to serve the survivors struggling to recover from the years, or even decades, of trauma they have endured."

https://www.hocatl.org/

And hit up their free "!0 signs of human trafficking" ebook while you're there! Spot the signs, save a life.

Cheers, Mighty Selves 🍻

🧠✊

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Getting Out of Trauma Brain | Surviving These Time

Sat, 16 Jul 2022 07:59:23 GMT

Time for the science-backed conversation on how to survive these doomsdays.

The answer is, getting out of your trauma brain.

"Stand up and make a difference" opportunity of the week.

World Food Program - Aid Yemen 😥

"Even before fighting broke out in early 2015, Yemen was one of the poorest countries in the Arab world. With an average life expectancy below 64, the nation is ranked 179th out of 189 in the 2020 Human Development Index.

Seven years of conflict have left thousands of civilians dead and 4.2 million people displaced. Its impact on the country’s infrastructure has been devastating, with major overland routes and airports severely damaged.

Despite ongoing humanitarian assistance, 17.4 million Yemenis are food insecure. The number of food insecure people is projected to go up to 19 million by December 2022."

https://www.wfp.org/countries/yemen

Got a buck? Help feed some families.

TMFR contribution $250

Thanks Fuckers.

And cheers, remember that we can do this.

✊

🧠✊

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GUTS 2

Sat, 09 Jul 2022 09:33:50 GMT

Still speakin straight from the guts. Let's talk more what went wrong, what goes wrong for everyone, and the perils of living out of your (stupid fucking) human-programmed brain.

Thanks for the reset.

🧠✊

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GUTS

Sat, 09 Jul 2022 09:31:51 GMT

Like the ole' days. It's a straight out my mouth, sensitive, and honest one.

You know when you "lose it"? Lose access to that thing... that feels like you... and all the passion/energy/interest/courage you once had? When life is spinning you around faster than your head can adapt?

..... And then you find that thing again.

Let's talk about what's been missing. What I fckn lost (again). What the key to recovery REALLY is. And what we're all going to be working on refinding together... AGAIN.

Sorry for splintering. Let's try again as a whole.

Cheers

🤍

🧠✊

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What SHOULD you be doing?

Sat, 09 Jul 2022 09:26:45 GMT

Let's have one easy conversation and call "societal trauma" wrapped for a beat. Talkin' dialectics and their implications... as an intro to wise words from our Fort Friend, Leanne.

Then let's get back to our SELVES.

🧠✊

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A Few Supplements on "Society Trauma"

Sat, 09 Jul 2022 09:23:32 GMT

If you're on the market for "fuck this".... A few more thoughts.

Parenting challenges in society. The panic that's driving everyone to the brink. And following "thought leaders" who demand that no one thinks for themselves, at all.

Let this Fucker get out a few more of the societal trauma brain bugs, and we'll get to "how to survive it without backsliding" next.

🧠✊

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EXERCISE | Lessons Learned from the Cage

Sun, 03 Jul 2022 14:54:34 GMT

How do we start to spot the societal trauma lessons in our own selves, through examining our family behaviors? Today, let's talk about ways we're limited by being born in the same-ish cage as our family, and absorbing all their "allowed" behaviors, per society.

REMINDER, as always. Don't trigger yourself if you're not ready to do this sort of inner work on your own! Always talk to your therapist before you listen to my dumbass.

Cheers, Fuckers

🍻

🧠✊

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Caged Family Trauma | Rat Wars Part II

Sat, 02 Jul 2022 13:40:07 GMT

The rats run for their pellets, the pellets are more worthless every day, and their (unwanted) families are growing ever-larger... while all the other rats continue to fight, feud, and fuel the same "work til you die" narrative.

What happens now?

Does daddy rat keep his balled up paws to himself? Or is there massive risk of survival trauma trickledown?

Y'all aren't rats. You the MFs who can take broader perspectives and find effective paths out of dead end situations.

✊

Hands up, fists high. For our selves, our loved ones, and the change we need.

Cheers.

🧠✊

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Entrapped in Fear | Rat Wars Part I

Sat, 02 Jul 2022 13:38:02 GMT

Hard to understand what's going on "out there" and also "inside of you"?

Yeah, well. How COULD you, when none of it is based on logic - only fear reacting to fear.

Sometimes it helps to see humans as a different species entirely. Makes it more obvious who's fixing the race and the ways we're all running in place.

Let's talk my favorite topic - the crossroads of psychology, trauma-programming, and current events.

Hang tight out there. Gotta go through Dystopialand to reach the next civilization.

We got this, Fuckers. Together. Not scrambling apart.

✊✊✊✊

Lastly - formal apology for any upset over referencing Leftover Crack. The allegations against members aren't okay or dismissed here.

🧠✊

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When you can't get the basics of life | Trauma-Society

Fri, 24 Jun 2022 14:53:39 GMT

So humans have done incredible things, right? Or have we constructed our own cages and called it "progress."

Born into the artificial environment, unable to get the resources you need, and watching the whole planet burn as you're still dutifully reporting to that 9-5.

What happens when we remove ourselves from the "acute brutality of nature," only to create sustainably-brutal systems of shame and obligation?

Uh... no time, no space, no energy. No choice. No outlook for circumstantial improvement.

And then we wonder why our heads have been feeling fucking crazy.

It's not you. You aren't failing. This system is.

The Voting Rights Alliance - The Voting Rights Alliance is a growing non-partisan network of organizations, activists, and legislators working to restore and protect voting rights from concerted attacks that undermine our access to the polls, and to have our votes fairly counted.

https://www.votingrightsalliance.org

Thanks Fuckers.

Cheers to getting the basics you need.

🧠✊

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Supplement: When is it time to leave a situation?

Mon, 13 Jun 2022 18:21:02 GMT

So... we have a hard time as TMFRs, trusting when we've "done enough" versus guilting ourselves into staying in situations that are breaking us.

And the truth is, there's no clear answer. No cut and dry way to approach every situation.

There are a lot of gray tones.

This morning, I just wanted to riff on some additional points to consider when you've been living under continual stimulus control and feel your Self splintering beyond recognition.

What can we do for ourselves when we CAN'T leave? How do we KNOW that it's time to go? And how else can we see this removal of ourselves from a shituation... as a reversible experimental condition?

Let's talk a bit further... about the fact that none of this is black or white.

🧠✊

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Work vs. Recovery | Control your own time

Sat, 11 Jun 2022 13:20:10 GMT

Work.

We all have to do it. With trauma, we aren't usually very good at it. At least, we aren't good at finding jobs that actually suit us, or holding tumultuous positions without letting them decide our fate every day.

The actual work isn't really the problem, but the social challenges, tendency for chaos, and long term effects on our mental health often are damning when repeated sunrise after sunrise.

Not to mention, the arbitrary rules, regulations, and stress-loaded pressures they place on your time.

When you can't control your schedule, you can't control your recovering brain. Today, let's talk about trade-offs. Maybe you'll also want to jump into a lifestyle known as "money poor but time rich."

🧠✊

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Space for Recovering Yer Splintered Self | Let's get back to it, Welcome to Season 8

Sat, 11 Jun 2022 13:14:00 GMT

So we know we need time to recover. But what else is commonly impossible to access, trapping us in continual triggerings that dis-integrate our brains, corrupt our emotions, and lose our Selves?

Space. We need abundant room from our circumstances to make improvements on them.

Otherwise, we're just living under continual stimulus control as we lose our own.

Let's talk about the challenges finding time and space from circumstances that are fucking up our brains. The temporary uptick in upset when you DO get some distance. The positive and progressive strides that quickly follow.

And what all of that means for the show, as this Self finally re-emerges.

Welcome to Season 8.

Societal Rioters:

To report the NRA for funding political activities as a non-profit:

Here’s an emailable form https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/f13909.pdf

Just send to eoclass@irs.gov

To fill out the form, you can use this information as a template. https://docs.google.com/document/d/19za4QqQrxw1ZZRNBqQucs43XyV18ohH6C7Yk0LCshAg/edit?usp=sharing

To help support access to safe and shameless abortions in the Deep South:

Check out the YellowHammer Fund https://yellowhammerfund.org

Thanks Fuckers ✊

🧠✊

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Recovery vs. Relationships

Sat, 04 Jun 2022 11:38:35 GMT

So everything is hell in my world. How about yours? Coming to you live from a crusty hotel room, sortof sick, and beyond exhausted after a family blowup... Let's bring up some old topical trends: Your trauma recovery versus sneakily abusive relationships.

You know what we REALLY need to stay functional and moving forward in trauma brain recovery? TIME. Time, space, and attention to let our brains sort out their shit, and to keep our perspectives on the up and up. Grounding, coping, and reframing techniques are no help if you have no space to use them.

And with our historical relational trauma trainings ringing between our ears... you know... Time is often lost to codependency, conflict, chaotic escapism, overconcern for others' problems, and emotional upset when we try to play nice with others. Womp.

So what's a Fucker to do?

Get more discerning about who you share your brain with, that's what.

🧠✊

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Empower Your Self | On the human rights war

Fri, 27 May 2022 12:57:25 GMT

TW: body autonomy

It's time for your Self to stand.

PS - Yeah, I know. MORE shit has happened.

Clearly, this bitch (the world and myself) is on fire.

Let's use the flames to light the way forward ay?

🔥

🧠✊

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Supplement: Resistance Vs. Resilience

Sun, 22 May 2022 12:59:59 GMT

Let's talk a bit more.

So we think it’s a good idea to aim for resilience - give yourself some fucking grace if life scrambles your brains and you can’t shut it out. That’s the least we can do for our selves after this whole battle we’ve been in together.

BUT… you do need SOME resistance to be resilient. The problem is that blind resistance is avoidance, denial or delusion which doesn’t really lead to rewiring, recovery, or resilience.

With me? If not, no problem, that’s what we’re here to chat about

🧠✊

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Perspective Resilience Vs. Resistance | urnottaweakassbitch

Sat, 21 May 2022 12:24:44 GMT

Resilient... toxic or the goal?

You found out about complex trauma. You’ve reframed your past to understand your present. You’ve developed new thoughts that carry you through each day into a less shit-stained future. And then… those thoughts can be reversed, disregarded, and disposed of with the snap of a finger, if the right (wrong) influence opens a contradictory, more powerful, brain pathway. And cue the trauma brain, dragging you back into the perspective pits without warning.

What’s a Fucker to do?

Well, today, we’re going to talk about an important area in psychology - maintenance.

So how do you feel about the word “resilient”? Or are you actually striving for something much harder, properly defined as “resistance?”

🧠✊

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Your Newly Diagnosed Perspective; Barriers, Supports, and Self-Stigma | Research

Sat, 14 May 2022 18:24:49 GMT

So, even getting to a CPTSD diagnosis can be hard. USING that diagnosis effectively can be even harder.

There are still barriers to recovery on practical, financial, and social fronts. Our new mental health labels can create stigmatizing conditions from the outside and inside, leading to obsessive thought traps. We can over-identify with the diagnosis or take it on with a personal vengeance. And in the end, being negatively-obsessed with your destructive past can perpetuate the invalidation of "trauma" on a societal level.

Not that it's your job to fix society. Just your "Self."

Today, let’s talk about the trauma perspective tightrope we all have to walk. Toeing the line between “ignorant” and “obsessive” when assessing our newly reframed and validated traumatic experiences.

🧠✊

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Your Undiagnosed Perspective | "When you don't know what's wrong" Research

Sun, 08 May 2022 14:23:05 GMT

So, you've built some traumatized perspectives. But what happens before you KNOW about them?

Have you heard the term "PTSD" applied to your life yet? Do you believe it? And if not, how are you explaining the full shitlist of symptoms that's defined life so far? How are you explaining them as "part of your inherent brokenness"?

Today, we're talking about the challenges of having an uninformed perspective - why it's sometimes difficult to find a clinician with the right diagnostic interpretation, what happens when you're living with a brain full of bad self-assessments, and the power of finally hearing that "trauma" explains it all, so you can move forward without overcompensatory collapse.

Gotta diagnostic story of your own? Record it and send to traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com to share with the Fort!

🧠✊

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CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVES

Sun, 24 Apr 2022 13:24:30 GMT

Let's get less bleak. What can you DO about perspectives that might not be fitting your authentic experiences or modern life? How do we challenge old beliefs, and why ARE they so hard to disrupt?

You don't have to carry your family trauma. But you're gonna have to work to erase the old data. And, uh, the people around you probably won't follow suit.

But you can do it, determined MF. One experiment at a time.

🧠✊

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Top Brain Concepts | 2021 Reflection

Mon, 17 Jan 2022 14:49:11 GMT

Today let’s do a broader recap of what seem to have been the best conceptual lessons we picked up in 2021 from the show. As in, the topics that changed the way we’re seeing our brains the most effectively and efficiently. Forever. In a way that we can never undo. The ideas that have laid the groundwork for… all our inner work, actually happening. AND the points that most successfully convinced us we weren’t balls-crazy for thinking this thing or that one was happening in the past.

🧠✊

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Top 5 Social Learning Lessons | 2021 Reflection

Wed, 05 Jan 2022 17:26:39 GMT

There's been a looot of learning in this hell-year. If you're experiencing new events, you're putting new data points in your brain. And what an "experience" it's been.

But if I had to condense the major takeaways into a "Top 5" clickbait list... here's what I think the most significant, life-sense-making, brain-bustin lessons have been.

Stay tuned for part II, because I decided to include some LESS DEPRESSING lessons, too. Thanks, contrast; Living a nightmare makes the pathway to creating better days a lot clearer.

🍻

🧠✊

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Don't Let Those Fuckers Get You Down | 2021 Reflection

Wed, 05 Jan 2022 17:21:57 GMT

"I want my own life," we say.

"Let's see you try," everyone retorts.

Today, let's talk about THE SANITY-MAKING INSIGHT of my 2021 - realizing how other people's behaviors reflect their own mental disordering, even if they're putting the blame outsiders. Especially when manipulative control tactics, tribalism, and personal justifications are the name of the game.

Let's take some realistic assessments of the brains that are busting your own.

Turns out, sometimes IT'S NOT YOU - it IS actually the ego defensive programming that supports your social system.

🧠✊

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Fawning and Free-Will | 2021 Reflection

Wed, 05 Jan 2022 17:17:35 GMT

So how DO we actually determine who we are and what we want to accomplish? If my past year's observations are right... We don't. More often, other people's trauma becomes our lifelong instruction manual.

Let's look at big themes underlying the past year - starting with the fact that... your brain maybe never belonged to you, in the first place. Starting with corporate gods on earth, the mental abuse trickles straight down into our family homes and infiltrates our developing behavioral programs. Next thing you know, you're living to support stability for THEM, with no idea who you are at all.

Let's talk brain-manipulation and lifelong self-abandonment that comes from universal fawning.

🧠✊

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Closing 2021; Better Brains for 2022

Fri, 31 Dec 2021 14:20:34 GMT

"What a time to be alive," has been one of my top responses to the past year. AKA - what a swirling, head-spinning mess of chaos and upset. Events and emotions never fully digested, because there's always a new survival effort waiting around the corner. Leaving me with a "dream-like" recollection of unplaced experiences that continue to cloud thinking processes.

So... how do we move forward from less than great times with a "sane" psyche? How do we clear the brain-boxes that have been packed to the brim with inexplicable events? Are there ways to place "strategically ignored files" into historical learning compartments more effectively, so we can finally stop half-swimming in them before it alllll starts again?

I mean, I sure hope so, or else this is a lot of lead-in for nothing.

Here are the exercises I do each year to close old chapters and make sense of what I've seen so far, so the next phase has room to be penned. Plus, how I get my brain on-track to be better, every day, in line with who I want to be and what I want to accomplish in life. We're talking task-managing old processes, making sense of sensory-emotions, and realizing the necessary steps towards becoming a more genuine, unmarred "Self."

Cheers to clearing your brain and creating a life you actually want in 2022.

Jess

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Long-term Recovery; Your "Self" Circuit

Wed, 24 Nov 2021 13:37:36 GMT

So we talk an awful lot about the "key" to managing this lifelong battle of You vs. Bad Brains. Problem being... we're great at short bursts of success, but not so skilled at the consistently managing our negative thoughts and feelings over time.

The missing piece? The top-down and bottom-up brain management system that we need to shut out shitty re-appraisals of our every move, thought, feeling and memory. Especially those life-shaking doubts imparted by others.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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Family Holiday Survival 2021

Mon, 22 Nov 2021 18:12:27 GMT

HERE WE FUCKING GO. Who's ready to kickoff the season of family shitshows?

Before you get your brain destroyed by the people who are supposed to care about you the most, TMFRs is here to help you remember a few important things about what their actions really mean and how you can choose to "opt out" of the emotional hangover.

🧠✊

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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"Closure" of Background Brain Processes

Wed, 17 Nov 2021 13:38:11 GMT

Living in a thick, engulfing cloud of exhaustion, thought jumble, mental or emotional obsession. Accomplishing the bare minimum. Not even caring about those achievements. Taking twice as long to do basic tasks. Finally completing them, only to realize… you did it all wrong. Letting physical standards slip. Finding that anger is always just a few milliseconds away. Proclamations of “fuck you!” at the top of the greatest hits list - but, somehow, knowing that a good part of that fury is actually internally localized. Probably hating yourself for the whole thing. Because that’s what we do best.

Realizing that something is bothering your brain, with half-processed coding creating other operating system errors. But not knowing what it is, or not knowing how to resolve it.

So, what if there was a better way? How do you get... what they call... "closure"? And get your brain back under full control of the task manager?

Let's talk about a possible framework for forcing thoughts to be resolved. Ending rumination, energetic drains, and emotional uprisings by working with your neurobiology.

Into it? Let me know how it goes! Write or record-in, and share what you've seen. Show us some concept drawings or applied journal entries.

Send whatever you've got to say, I'm at traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com and on the instagram (sparingly, for mental program management) at traumatized.motherfuckers.

Remember. You're not the only one with a poorly multitasking brain, and you're not doomed to keep running that buggy bastard forever.

Hail the empowerment of your Brain Supervising "Self."

And Cheers, Fuckers.

Jess

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Reprogramming "Attachment Styles"

Tue, 02 Nov 2021 13:55:42 GMT

We know, we know.... Anxious or avoidant, early learning calls all the shots.

Or does it?

Is attachment style a lifelong trait? A characteristic you can't shake? Or should we see attachment as an opposing set of default brain instructions? We're talking about "favorited" neural patterns, compounding environmental filters, and the most evolutionarily-pleasing ways of engaging with others acting as perpetual reinforcement. A much different view on the "attachment talk."

Let's take an academic journal article and discuss implications for your relationships. Plus, what it means about building better ones in the future.

Got an attachment success or failure to talk about? Just ready to get your story off your chest? Just hoping to give a MF callout to other folks who might want to rap about a specific issue? You know what to do.

Share your voice. Write or record your story and send it to traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com. Let me know where it's safe to share, and let someone know they aren't alone in this.

Remember, you aren't damaged, doomed, or dead yet. Just running on programs you never meant to download.

Cheers Fuckers

Xx Jess

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Personal | DECATHECT; Anxious-turns-Avoidant Attachment

Sun, 24 Oct 2021 13:02:46 GMT

Let's talk about the emotional detachment self-preservation tactic known as "Decathecting." You might know it as abandonment, ghosting, or relational deactivation. Throw in some black and white thinking, and we've got a pretty standard CPTSD talk going on here. Even if it's being filtered through my (obvious) romantic mistakes.

So what happened? How does connection-overestimation and premature life-integration set you up for failure? How does Narc energy play into it? And when did "Parts" get all involved?

Gotta story of your own? You know what to do. Get a set of headphones, hit "record," and send your shit to traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com. Hop into the TMFR community at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

Dank memes and vid shorts @ https://www.instagram.com/traumatized.motherfuckers/

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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Just a Chat. Seasonal Triggers, Going No Contact and Reclaiming Your Brain (Life)

Wed, 13 Oct 2021 16:44:26 GMT

Ever feel like you're not allowed to be yourself? Like your words aren't valid? Like your only utility is performing for others? And all the rest is "N/A?"

Yeah... So, as you might guess, mental health podcasting got to be a hard effort after being immersed in my Family of Origin for a year. But with a solid month of "no contact" comes the re-mergence of access to your own thoughts and feelings again. Fucking fancy.

Today, I'm taking ten steps backwards and radioing in with a conversation and community discussion, rather than a 20 page research essay. Talking off the cuff, openly, and honestly about the ups and downs of living with a T-Brain... the way this project was always supposed to be.

Let's cover:

- cognitive-emotional changes and visceral memory findings during seasonal changes

- our trauma-complicated relationships with "routines"

- YOUR best grounding habits dissociative identity resources (Janina Fisher, anyone?)

- dating on trauma brain

- community changes & the call for your MF stories

- and this month's Ask Me Anythings, streaming exclusively at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

For more information, to contribute, or to join the TMFR / YSFB community, hit up www.t-mfrs.com or email me at traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com

Thanks for being here, My Fuckers. You make this scumchild's world go round.

Hail your Self.

Hail Archie.

Cheers Y'all.

-YerMotherfuckerJess

BONUS BLURB:

So like I said, I've done-fucked up this Patreon thing a few times while trying to find the right balance between keeping our stories private, my homeless ass fed, and helping MFs get the info to realize they're not superscrewed.

I'm so, so sorry for the runaround you've been through as long-time Blanket Fort listeners as I've shuffled the subscription tiers. I'm trying to make it up to all y'all dedicated subscribers by releasing higher posts for all to see, and I'm listening if you've got other suggestions! Ya know where to find me.

Apologies for the hassle - a MF doesn't know what they don't know until they know it. Building better brain programs all the time.

Cheers Friends.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Bonus | Re-wiring Doomsdaying / Panic Programming

Fri, 01 Oct 2021 11:00:49 GMT

Sorry for the switch in plans - sometimes a Motherfucker's computer breaks, so does the car-house, and everything goes to freck.

But here we are, reflecting on how surprisingly calm the day went, nevertheless. No panic attack. No anxiety, anger, agitation. No shame spirals. Let's talk about THAT little change of pace, as it's rooted in the brain. Let's work on changing our automatic programming from "doom" to "eh, you're going to do what you've gotta do."

References:

Thrown more curves than bones. Credit: Kali Masi

Existing in a Crisis. Credit: Bayside

Nothing to get excited about. Figure it oot, bud. Credit: Letterkenny

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Spot Cyclical Abuse Patterns

Thu, 30 Sep 2021 15:09:36 GMT

So, we've learned to identify what counts as "abuse" with more clarity. We've accepted our early challenges and intend to move on from them. BUT, still find ourselves getting sucked into relationships that recreate our old circumstances and mental / emotional downfalls.

NOW WHAT.

Let's talk about pinpointing the trends in our romantic lives, by using our internal monitoring systems to notice the patterns IN US that have carried through multiple relationships. Talking energetic, emotional, cognitive, and behavioral shifts... as well as resentment/comfort dualities.

Want the full scoop? You know where to go. Get the bonus content, the summary video, and personal Ask Me Anything benefits to dig in deeper! Patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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The Brain Basis of Abusive Relationships on Repeat

Thu, 23 Sep 2021 11:24:54 GMT

Welcome to the fullest of the full, most extensively extended version of the episode! Thanks for being a diehard MF.

So why are all of your romantic (and otherwise) relationships chronically abusive? Especially when you're soooo dead set on breaking the chain? Is it as simple as "accepting and perpetrating abuse because mom and dad demonstrated violence?"

Today, let's talk about the actual brain patterning problems at play. What's going on in our heads that makes abuse seem both "normal" and "correct," especially when we live in a society that echoes all the same narratives and the fallacy of "security" plays up our continual terror states.

Talking oppositional programming, the abuser-abusee axis, energetic control, tit-for-tat agreements, and the manipulative power of offering security.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Apply It | Repersonalization Pt II - A New Life for Your SELF

Tue, 14 Sep 2021 18:12:33 GMT

Well, I'm a sucker and I won't leave you hanging. Everyone gets Part II - take your "self" motivation and do something with it.

So we dove down and reconnected with the fact that we're real, actual, autonomous animals on this planet last time. We got in touch with the awareness of "Self" that's always been here and always will be. Now what?

Let's strengthen your continuous identity, put hard times into context, and start figuring out how to live the way we actually always wanted. Spoilers: It's going to take everything you've got. Better to live trying than die waiting for something to happen.

To hear my own SUV Life decision making, self-determination, and learnings so far, check out the Behind the Scenes Bonus Content tiers.

🧠✊

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** Re-ssociate. Re-find Your "Self" and Reclaim Your Life.

Fri, 10 Sep 2021 17:17:56 GMT

So you forgot you exist in your own life, huh? Maybe you've been numb for a minute. Maybe your crutches have become wheels. How do you break out of the mental/emotional disconnection and restart your will to live - for your self. I got tips.

You know the deal - take these ideas or leave them. Always consult with your therapist before you dive into the deep end.

See you in "Part II" - turning that anger into a new motherfucking LIFE. As described from my SUV-living.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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Note: Trauma Cannot Make You "Lose" Yourself. (And other shit you need to accept ASAP)

Mon, 06 Sep 2021 21:44:01 GMT

Just seeing some negativity that needs to be stomped out - our perception of "lost" versions of ourselves. Stop hating who you think you are now. Stop worrying about "who you used to be." Stop assuming you can never be that person again. It's all about your neural networks (the discussion continues).

Hurry up and jump into the full episodes at the Advanced Learner Levels so you can find your "old selves" already.

🧠✊

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Emotional Dissociation | Depersonalization

Fri, 03 Sep 2021 20:21:15 GMT

Ever wonder where your feelings went? Yeah, well, we all do. But ever wonder if you really exist at all? Intense stress will do that to you, from your emotions to your mental faculties, and finally all the way down to your attachment to your own life. Let's talk about the super common process of disintegrating so wholly, you doubt your own experiences.

Hitting the mark? Send me a tip on Kofi! kofi.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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* Homelessness > Abuse | When Your Self Says "No More."

Fri, 03 Sep 2021 05:33:16 GMT

Life calls.

So, let's talk a personally-based mashup of dissociation under abuse, depersonalization, and being driven to make big changes when the "loss of self" becomes indisputable, the anger aligns, and your dog's life is the final motivator to reconnect with who you forgot you were all along. It's the car / camp life, as a result of saying "I'm real, and I'm really not doing this anymore."

Ready to join me? Good, I'll see you in the next episode on Repersonalization AND the behind the scenes "lost tapes" from my first experiences learning to live in the woods.

🧠✊

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* Personal | No Contact 2021 And Always Hail Archie

Tue, 31 Aug 2021 22:43:53 GMT

You know those times in life when everything abruptly changes, and it's tragic and beautiful all at once?

Take some of mine.

instagram.com/archiewheeliepup to see his journey

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Rerelease | Archie As a Metaphor

Fri, 27 Aug 2021 19:42:31 GMT

Born "different." Overcoming challenges that "normal" species members don't even notice. Constantly falling on his face. Flailing. Sometimes, freezing up with overstimulation. But always getting up and trying again.

Today, I'm talking about my wheeliepup Archie... As a metaphor. How does one wobbly dog exemplify the struggles of Complex Trauma? Or am I finally losing it as we stumble around the yard every day?

Have a lot in common with Archie? Join the TMFR discord community at t-mfrs.com/join and check out the new Patreon page at www.patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers to help me support this effort (the podcast and Archie, alike). Oh, and follow Archie's shit-eating progress yourself @archiewheeliepup on the socials.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

Dank memes and vid shorts @ https://www.instagram.com/traumatized.motherfuckers/

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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* Trauma-Personal | Archie Update

Sat, 14 Aug 2021 15:07:56 GMT

Heads up, emotional.

If you're already feeling too many feelings, uh, probably don't listen.

If you're failing at feeling - hey, this cracked my sternum wide open, maybe it'll release your emotions and remind you how to "experience" too.

If you're looking for Archie's full story, check it here https://gofund.me/7790bed4 and here instagram.com/archiewheeliepup

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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** Progress Halted: Your Trauma-Self

Wed, 11 Aug 2021 16:51:50 GMT

Time to have a rough talk. Ever meet someone who seemed strangely "rooted" in their trauma, from a personally obstinate place? As in, they don't seem to WANT to believe that they can feel better, live better, expect better? Ever feel like... you might have a little piece of that inside yourself? Well buckle up, because we all do. It's time to learn about someone we accidentally embody, who shuts down our ability to be any other way. It's time to talk about the Trauma-Self.

🧠✊

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** Fawning, Enmeshment, Relational Triggers (What is CPTSD, Alex)

Tue, 27 Jul 2021 19:26:20 GMT

As CPTSD trainees, we're programmed to give a lot of our energy to others. A lot of access to our brains, too. So what happens in life when you're pre-emptively influenced by the thoughts, feelings, and desires of everyone else instead of your own? When fawning, fronting, and worrying becomes your relationship style, what are the long term effects on a brain?

Talking abuse, boundaries, codependency, defeat, emotional entanglement, fawning, generational trauma, historical learning, inner critics and the rest of the trauma alphabet. Friend triggers. Mother triggers. All the fawning fuckery you could dream.

She's a biggum.

🧠✊

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Supplement: What's Fawning?

Tue, 27 Jul 2021 17:14:53 GMT

Before we dive into a loooong episode on enmeshment, codependency, boundaries, and the ways that we're brain-patterned not to understand any of the above... let's talk about one of the big portions of the discussion that often gets overlooked. What the fuck IS fawning? Answer: Way more mental health-hijacking than you think.

🧠✊

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*** YOU v. BRAIN v. PROGRAMMING pt II

Wed, 14 Jul 2021 17:55:44 GMT

SEIYGE. Smoke em if you got em. PART TWO OUT NOWWWW.

Pt I of the series? It's on the public platform! Everyone needed a hand this week.

But THIS second episode is accidentally done early... and, yk, no point in delaying the spread of "you ain't nuts" narratives... so here ya go, Fucker. An early release for you to get the maximum flow. Finish up the two-parter conceptualization series and git ready for the exercise episode to tie the shows into YOUR life. Coming atcha this weekend.

Today...

Ready to conceptualize the terrible brain programs you're accidentally running each day? How'd they get there, how can we rethink them instead of accepting them, and how can we redirect them? Talking family patterns, distraction, indecision, ADD, hypervigilance, trauma, and PTSD fog all in one.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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*** YOU v. YER BRAIN pt I

Wed, 14 Jul 2021 17:42:33 GMT

Rough times, huh? Emotional/cognitive scrambling? We've been talking tiny details - TODAY, going the opposite route. Laying out BIG picture concepts for rethinking your entire existence so far, and having more control over your brain every day into the future. Let's cement a line in the sand about who YOU are, versus your BRAIN, versus your automated meat jump suit. It's the brain-conceptualizations that have saved my soul (or... whatever this thing is) Motherfuckers. A way to start studying your thoughts and emotions without fear of how they depreciate your value on the planet.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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Bonus Nug | Reddit Post: "Mirroring Narcissist Parents"

Sat, 26 Jun 2021 11:24:28 GMT

Oh man, say what you will about NarcissistParents on Reddit, but this thread has it ALL. Everything we've been talking about this spring, from recognition of narc parents and personal narc habits, their common traits, and neural reprogramming through the power of going No-Contact. It's a different kind of episode, and I hope you're ready to reflect on reddit.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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**** Family Brain Hijinks (Pt III of Brain Patterning Series)

Fri, 25 Jun 2021 02:00:00 GMT

Well, if the past few episodes haven't been damning enough... today we're talking about the generational trauma indoctrination, abusee role-acceptance, and mental abuse tactics that come pre-programmed in our connection-hungry little brains. Not to mention, the explanation for black sheep syndrome, the role of boundaries, and the ways we can finally stop being our families' brain puppets: going Limited and No Contact.

Got a story to share? (I know you do) Hit me up at traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com, the private patreon discord, or DMs! Send me your voice, and empower others to make their own NC/LC decision.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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***** Connection Addicts: The Science of Your Fucked Up Relationships

Wed, 23 Jun 2021 12:00:35 GMT

"What is this 'connection' thing that pulls me in and maintains horrible relationships?" Today we're talking about the damning effects of synchrony and emotional contagion... Especially when you come from an unhealthy family. Experience-dependent learning starts at day one, and so does your biological drive for similar neurons firing at similar times.

So, what codependent brain programs did you learn to mirror, who do you think you naturally "neurally connect" with, and how do you get stuck in bad relationships when you "sync" to avoid discomfort, Motherfuckers?

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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***** Lifelong Neurological Effects of Early Parental Relationships

Wed, 23 Jun 2021 11:00:20 GMT

How do the four basic parenting types - plus the Narc parenting variant known as "affectionless control" - play out? How do they relate to generational trauma? Talking about the mental terror that overtakes baby brains from dissociation onwards, alters their development on a cellular level, and contributes to a full lifetime of inappropriate responses to internal and external stimulation. You might know it as "the next 80 years of your life on trauma brain."

It's a dense and heavy episode, that we all need to hear.

For more relational trauma education, MF community, and oh-so-many-personal stories interwoven with these academic lessons, visit patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers Got insights or stories to share? Send your recordings to traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com and contribute your voice to the show!

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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***** Fragmented Personalities; Implications and Life-Declusterfucking Applications

Wed, 09 Jun 2021 11:24:20 GMT

So we've covered the signs. We've covered the scientific "how." Now... what the fuck to do about our trauma-programmed personalities? What else do we need to understand about our dissociative neural networks, what common trauma-life complaints do they cause, and how can we work with them? How do all our common trauma complaints... kindof come down to easily activated and signal-amplifying neural networks?

Hell, how can we hijack them for our own purposes? Also... how do pets have anything to do with parts therapy? I've got a lot of thoughts and not enough time. Let's talk implications, round I.

Ready to share your selves? Hit up patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers to join in the conversations and mingle with MY neural networks. Send in your experiences anytime at traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com. Share the socials and be sure to holler in the comments sections.

Don't forget to check the brand new BC Schizophrenia Society podcast, Look Again, Mental Illness Re-examined wherever you listen.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/traumatized-motherfuckers.

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Post-Pandemic Wilds (Anxiety-Depression-Obsession-Deintegration)

Sat, 22 May 2021 21:39:30 GMT

So everything changed in the past month. In the aftermath, we're feeling a bit wild, huh? Up, down, obsessed, depressed, overloaded, anxious, excited, and dreadful. What's going on with the internal chaos, and what can we do to reintegrate our ideas of life before, during, and after a global health catastrophe?

Wanna share your post-pandemic experience? Send written or audible recordings to traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com and get featured on the Listener Experience episodes!

Looking for more words on your disintegrated trauma life, from myself and a bunch of other Fuckers? Check patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers and subscribe to the exclusive TMFR podcast feed at an "advanced learner" level - featuring the full, hour-long episodes you're used to, with all the details you need to figure out this traumatized life.

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Bonus Nug | "Boundaries" - Reexamining Our Trauma Trap

Fri, 21 May 2021 21:20:08 GMT

What do trauma survivors commonly fuck up? Our understanding, appreciation, and acceptance of boundaries. Today, we're coming at you with the original Motherfucking recording spirit... unscripted, imperfect and honest talk from my natural trauma recovery environment. The place where I've been bonus-episoding all over the Patreon Blank Fort. The woods. Put in your headphones and let's take a walk.

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Bonus Nug | Considering Self over Fawning, Perfectionism, and Hypervigilance

Fri, 21 May 2021 18:03:04 GMT

Laying the ground for what's to come.... a lot of extra content from a better environment and mindset. Worse audio. But who ever said this thing was about being perfect?

Get ready for more imperfect bonus material, along with plenty of the professional audio gear you're used to hearing, when we get back into our academic talk about neural networks. Preview coming at you hot.

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Eviction Notice | The End of Complex Trauma Recovery; We are Traumatized Motherfuckers

Tue, 18 May 2021 10:43:56 GMT

The beginning of the trauma life end.

Time for our big talk... it's time to end of this open-door trauma rehab house. We need to have a hard conversation about the final days of TMFRs as you know it. But, if you want, we can still be Fucked up Friends. www.patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Fuck Off Boomers; The Covert Narc Echo Chamber

Wed, 12 May 2021 20:40:55 GMT

Why do so many of our parents have the same unfortunate covert abuse tactics in their front pocket? Why did we grow up with an unhealthy narrative about self-worth and self-accountability? Where did all this narcissistic energy come from, originally? Well, I was going to do a deep dive into the Silent and Boomer generations to let you know, but after the springtime personality disorder uprisings have tried my last nerve... let's reapproach this episode from a less enabling perspective. One that doesn't contribute to the abuse echo chamber they've popularized in the world they (very practically) ruined. Fuck Off Boomers. Remember, be sure to tune in on Thursday for big news. You'll want to be here.

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** Parent Narcissists and CPTSD

Wed, 05 May 2021 20:40:33 GMT

Last time we learned about a new type of Narc; the "Covert" variety... who sound an awful lot like our mothers, collectively. So what happens if you WERE raised by a Narcissist mom, in particular? What are the common characteristics of the relationship? What are the common childhood templates under Narcissistic Abuse? What happens to kids - specifically daughters - in the long run? And how do you deal with someone who doesn't want to treat you differently?

Have a CovNarc parent of your own? Hit me up at traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com or t-mfrs.com anytime. Share your story; written or recorded, I'd love to put it on the show.

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**** Defining Covert (Vulnerable) Narcissists

Thu, 29 Apr 2021 09:12:00 GMT

Have you been convinced that everything about you was "wrong?" Does someone in your life make you feel "off," in a way that's anxious, fearful, defeated, and self-doubting? Ever see that the person "helping" actually seemed to make the situation a lot worse? And then... do they bring it up for the next 20 years or so as proof of their merit? Ah, yeah. So my recent realization comes to a head, thanks to some deep dives into Covert (Vulnerable) Narcissist research. How about you? Today, we're talking about the characteristics of a Covert Narc and the symptoms that may present in YOU, in the aftermath.

Dealing with a CovNarc situation of your own? Tell me about it and help with the mf crowdsourced episode goal.

Hit me up anytime at t-mfrs.com or traumatizedmotherfuckers.com.

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** Stigmatizing Covert Abuse [AKA Beware the Nice Guy]

Thu, 22 Apr 2021 21:11:01 GMT

You've probably realized, abuse is a dirty topic not to happily discussed in the public sphere. Victims are blamed. Cases are dismissed. And perpetrators are enabled. But what's the point of our ignorance towards domestic abuse? Is there a reason why we tend to limit the scope of "abuse," blame-shift, and willfully forget? And how does abuser stigma actually perpetuate the thing we hate? We've all said it. We've all thought it. We've all... been cognitively dissonant about it. "But they seem like such a nice guy/gal." Beware the nice guy. Even if that includes YOURSELF.

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* Coping Strategies for Covert Abuse and Black Sheep Syndrome

Mon, 12 Apr 2021 21:10:43 GMT

So that last episode was an unexpected doozy, huh? (Still mortified.) Well, I'm back in Illinois and ready to clear the air with some actual LESSONS from this mess. In the past two weeks, here's where I've been, what I've realized, and what my therapist (and a helpful listener) has recommended for continuing to live under the same roof as an emotional abuser. Talkin' bout practical ways to distance yourself from abuse... when you can't literally distance yourself. Namely, learn to see yourself as "the adult" and not to give a fuck about these screaming children. In the best way possible.

Care to help me pay for therapy? Check out the donation options at www.t-mfrs.com - PayPal, Patreon, Ko-Fi and beyond.

Care to share your own covert abuse story? Hit me up at traumatizedmotherfxckers@gmail.com

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Coping with Covert Abuse and Black Sheep Syndrome

Sat, 10 Apr 2021 23:00:49 GMT

Posted this earlier today... had to take it down for the sake of keeping a roof over my head. No more podcast privacy in this house and shit's wild. So here it is!

Man, times are great. It's all really fitting when you listen to the episode.

😂

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* [TW] Personal | Covert Abuse and the Utility of Self-Harm

Mon, 05 Apr 2021 21:17:48 GMT

TRIGGER WARNING: emotional abuse, suicidal ideation, and self-harm. Childhood abuse can come with a lot of overt violence and aggression... or it might be more subtle than that. Years after tackling the obvious trauma, it might be a bit crisis inducing to realize your "safe" parent was the one who affected you the most, all along. Plus, seeing the ways self-harm is born from 'escaping' the parent who belittles your existence, not the one who wanted to erase it. Or so I've realized in the past few weeks. What's it like researching and writing about complex trauma from the unsafety of your childhood home? Ha Ha Ha.

Turns out, you might learn some new, life-perspective destroying things. And then get to deal with them in real time as they chase you around the house.

Final disclaimer: This is not a cry for help - just an honest take on living with emotional abuse with language and insight not before available. Don’t make this more embarrassing for me.

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** Neuroscience of Changing Core Beliefs and Behaviors

Fri, 02 Apr 2021 22:50:26 GMT

It's the Ask Me Anything results from March - talking about the specifics of changing your trauma-born core beliefs and behaviors with a neuroscience background approach. Understand what you're trying to accomplish, reach your goal more efficiently. Here's how our neural networks are causing so many problems and how to use our trauma physiology (right brain, left brain problems) for good.

Wondering about those ABA worksheets? Check the Patreon to get your hands on them. www.patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Why do we attract abusers?

Tue, 16 Mar 2021 16:00:46 GMT

You might not like the answer, but it's because both parties are comfortably willing. Because we try to form romantic lives based on early CPTSD lessons that set us up for disaster down the road. We have no boundaries, we mistake possession for love, we accept chaos as preferable to peace. And we blame ourselves for every single problem.

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** "Fragmented" Relationships

Fri, 12 Mar 2021 21:39:55 GMT

Expanding on fragmented personality via lessons from Janina Fisher and John Welwood (TMFR recommended authors). One of the ways we make sense of early trauma is black and white, "good or bad," thinking. Our abusers are good OR bad, but nothing in between. Unfortunately, we have the same corresponding judgements of ourselves in that moment..... and, then, everyone we meet down the road. How does "good vs bad" patterning lead to personality fragmentation, relationship terror, and disordered attachment? How can this perspective be used for healing?

Help me reach my goal of putting out more episodes per month! Check the progress at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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** Fragmented Personality; Intro to Dissociative Identity Disorder

Mon, 08 Mar 2021 21:33:33 GMT

"Who am I and why am I like this?" Dipping a toe into dissociative personalities. What are the proposed mechanisms that lead to a "fragmented self?" Talking about losing ourselves to our trauma adaptations, survival systems, negative detail-obsession and obligations, on repeat. The fracture that takes place when your inherent personality has to be shattered into a million survival-happy pieces to get by.

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** Core Beliefs

Thu, 04 Mar 2021 21:31:43 GMT

It's the February Ask Me Anything! How do you spot core beliefs, how do you change them, and how do you know when you've cleared the cache? Time to talk about Fucked Up Core Beliefs and all the ways they shape our lives without our permission. To submit your own AMA and potentially get a custom episode catered to your question, check patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers and help keep the show alive.

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Friendship Dissolutions

Mon, 15 Feb 2021 21:25:46 GMT

Ever lose, you know, your best friends in a time of trauma responsiveness and spend years ruminating about it? Yeah, well here's what I can say about my recent return to the skwad. Reflecting on trauma-reactions without reason, how my emotional brain got things twisted, and why I'm reluctant to give up this lone wolf lifestyle, even if friends might be back on the table.

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** Data-driven trauma management: Pt III (Experiments and Retrials)

Mon, 08 Feb 2021 21:30:48 GMT

Living with a semblance of personal understanding, continues! We've reached the final part of this Applied Behavior Analysis and trauma recovery crossover. You know the concepts, you know how to gather data... now it's time to run your self-experiments and see how your mental health is affected. We're talking about changing you behaviors, slowing your reactions to stimuli, and solidifying consequences to finally put an end to those shitty habits you hate. And... maybe finding out that your own mental landscape is the grounds for your "random" trauma responses along the way.

Is this helpful? Holler at me. Find TMFRs on all the social media outlets - like, share, and spread the message to help more MFs just like you connect with the resources they need.

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** Data-driven trauma management: Pt II (Distress Tracking)

Thu, 04 Feb 2021 21:30:48 GMT

Ready to stop calling yourself "crazy?" In Part I we learned a bit about Applied Behavior Analysis and the application to Trauma recovery. Today, we're using that information to collect data about ourselves, and beginning to form hypotheses about our old trauma brained tricks using Antecedents, Behaviors, and Consequences. It's the "Gathering Background Data" portion of this experiment. Buckle up, we're tracking your distress levels and looking for trends in your living patterns with ABC analyses.

Does this show help you? Could you help me? Visit t-mfrs.com to join the Patreon, Ko-Fi, or Paypal donors who think this project matters! While you're there, apply to the Discord community, check the Socials, and buy some Merch, whydontcha?

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** Data-driven trauma management: Pt I (ABA fundamentals)

Tue, 02 Feb 2021 21:30:44 GMT

It's time. Time to talk about Applied Behavior Analysis and trauma management. Because if you don't know why your body and brain respond to unknown stimuli in your inner and outer environments, it's pretty difficult to make a life you feel good about living. And we are master dissociators with trauma-brained programming that we've never been calm enough to understand. Here's how to change that.

Looking for more help? Check t-mfrs.com to apply for the private community or read blog transcripts of episodes. Help keep this trauma education project alive, get TMFR merch, and access AMAs at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Stress-illnesses and the F Word. Fibromyalgia.

Wed, 27 Jan 2021 21:24:58 GMT

Exhaustion, unexplained pain, weakness, digestive failures, tension migraines, temperature sensitivity, insomnia, insulin resistance, nausea, cold and flu symptoms... Fibromyalgia. Have you ever looked into all the stress-based ailments that Fibro (FM) encompasses? Yeah, I hadn't either. Today, we're talking about Fibromyalgia and all the ways that society hates psychosomatic illness. Plus, IS FM separable from C-PTSD? Hm.

Hoping to learn more about your Complex Trauma? Help keep this thing chugging along by visiting t-mfrs.com and donating to the Patreon, Ko-Fi, Paypal, or Merch store. Every penny decreases this MF's stress responses.

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Traumatized by Therapy

Sat, 16 Jan 2021 21:21:16 GMT

"It's not helping as much as it's hurting. So... do I really need to do this?" Talking about the ways therapy helps and harms, plus, why it's so goddamn hard to find a trauma-informed mental health professional. Looking for more support resources? Check out t-mfrs.com or traumatizedmotherfuckers.com.

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How to "recover" from C-PTSD

Tue, 12 Jan 2021 21:13:16 GMT

You asked. I'll share what I can. But realize: 1) whatdoIknow and 2) I use the term "recovery" lightly. Here are the steps that help a trauma life rebuild.

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* CPTSD Relationship Patterns

Fri, 08 Jan 2021 21:26:19 GMT

News: when it comes to relationships, I'm dumb! Or, still trying to fill the void left by my early experiences - one or the other. Here's a look at SOME of the ways I've made massive relationship mistakes in my past - from getting drunk on connection to rolling my emotional world into codependency to learned helplessness. Plus, so many musicians.

Equally confused about how healthy relationships work? Maybe you're a Motherfucker. Join the discord community at t-mfrs.com/join. Help me... not give up on this in an inner critic spiral? Visit patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers to help a Fucker out.

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*** What IS C-PTSD; Redux

Mon, 04 Jan 2021 21:16:59 GMT

We're doing it again! But this time... I'm not just anxiety-talking into space. Here's an inside look at life on CPTSD - and what's the difference between PTSD and COMPLEX PTSD, anyways?

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** Healing Trauma-Brain for 2021

Thu, 31 Dec 2020 21:06:44 GMT

Information is hard for a traumatized brain to process. We tend to carry unintegrated bits of data, which make living a directed life unmanageable. So start the new year on a better foot. Lay 2020 to rest with a few analytical activities to better recognize where you've been and who you want to be. You might feel avoidant of the change-oriented reflections - but, uh, isn't that how you got here in the first place? Yikes.

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*** So you're having a shit day out of nowhere

Sat, 19 Dec 2020 21:07:53 GMT

What else needs to be said? Even after years of trauma progress, backslides happen. Mental illness pops up when you least expect it. Dark, depressing day and anxious, angry afternoons. And your response? To berate the hell out of yourself? Right. Today, we're talking about the recovery PTSD management pitfalls that WILL happen, why, and how to deal.

Consider helping me out with social media shares, podcast reviews, and patreon support? Search the socials for traumatized motherfuckers and help me keep this lone C-PTSD researcher alive at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers. Every penny counts.

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*** Brain basis of Rumination, Depression, and PTSD

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 21:06:13 GMT

Ever get stuck endlessly cycling through unwanted thoughts? Wonder where rumination ends and your trauma begins? Today, I'm talking about the overlap between ruminatory thought patterns, depression, and PTSD. The research says: they share a similar brain malfunction. I say: there's one underlying thought current in all my past and present rumination. Maybe recognizing it will help you, too.

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Angry atheist to Woo-wonderer; Belief & C-PTSD recovery

Wed, 09 Dec 2020 19:00:00 GMT

Originally published July 2020, see those episodes for similar vibes.

Sometimes I slip up and mention things relating to my personal belief system... honestly, I feel a bit embarrassed by it and I don't want to push it on anyone. I try to keep my mouth tightly sewn shut instead of singing my praises of the Universe. But maybe that's doing everyone a disservice.

Letting myself consider that there could be more to life than the scientific black-and-white world that I subscribed to was a huge part of my trauma recovery. I wouldn't still be standing if I hadn't started dipping a toe into belief systems instead of nihilism. I definitely wouldn't keep showing up, making new shit for you Fuckers day after day.

Fact of the matter is, I don't care if you get into "woo" or maintain whatever views you hold. But believing that your life isn't determined by shitty luck and happenstance might be a missing piece of your lasting recovery. Eh, go find out for yourself - it's all an experiment, anyways.

Wanna rap? Connect at traumatizedmotherfuckers.com

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** "Purpose" and Trauma Healing | Death of an estranged parent

Wed, 09 Dec 2020 17:00:39 GMT

December 9th, 2020

TW - it's another dead dad episode.

Ever wonder why Motherfuckers who learn to deal with their PTSD also seem to have a sense of spirituality and self-direction? It's not an accident. Today, we're talking about the function of fate, purpose, and signs in coping and long-term trauma brain management. And, yes, there's research out of Emory to prove my point. Wanna help out? (please). Head to t-mfrs.com to send feedback, share your story, or browse some MF merch. Hit up the social medias and give TMFRs some desperately-needed love. Jump over to patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers or the site PayPal to help make this project possible!

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Personality changes on Anxiety vs. Depression

Sat, 05 Dec 2020 21:04:25 GMT

Ever feel like you're about 3 humans rolled into one? Maybe anxiety and depression are to blame, more than your fears of multiple personality disorder is on-point. Today, I'm talking about the vastly different influences of the high and low energy states in my life... and the life-abandoning stagnation that happens when those fuckers collide.

Into the message? Find more Traumatized Motherfucker media on instagram, facebook, youtube, and beyond! Check t-mfrs.com for contact forms or to apply to the private Discord channel. Help support the Complex effort managed by a simple MF by joining patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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*** Memory Processing and Involuntary Recollections

Wed, 02 Dec 2020 21:02:51 GMT

Back to the science! Ever feel like an amnesiac disaster when you can't seem to remember a single thing... or, at least, not a single thing that you want to remember? Wonder why your brain seems to have an extra long "buffering" time with new information? Guess what, there's research on that. Today, we're talking about memory processing, retrieval, and unwanted recollections.

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Thanksgiving Spanksgiving

Thu, 26 Nov 2020 20:59:40 GMT

I hate this holiday, anyone else? Just a quick shoutout to all the black sheep gearing up for some sort of disappointment, alienation, or conflict on this day of gratitude. You’re not the only one.

🧠✊

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*** Death of an Abusive Parent

Thu, 12 Nov 2020 20:59:34 GMT

We're all going to deal with it - the death of our parents. What's it like when the lost parent was the source of your early life trauma? A confusing conglomerate of sadness, anger, enlightenment, and regret? Oh yeah, that's the start of it. Let's throw in some black sheep family dynamics, inner critic rumblings, and fear of your similarly traumatized future. Today, we're talking generational trauma and complicated remorse.

🧠✊

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**** How to deal with Emotions

Wed, 21 Oct 2020 19:56:54 GMT

Having emotions, processing them, and letting them go has been a relatively new set of skills in my life. Allowing myself to feel has been nothing short of critical to my CPTSD recovery journey. Even though it seems like the worst thing you can possibly do, you must learn to deal with how you feel to live a functional, organized life with a functional, organized brain. Here are my 100% non-professional tips.

Hit the mark or miss it entirely? Let me know at t-mfrs.com. I love hearing from you! Hit up the Discord community, subscribe to the blog, and share TMFRs wherever you social media.

🧠✊

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**** Emotions, Attention, and Cognition

Sat, 10 Oct 2020 19:53:19 GMT

More bad news for all the dissociators out there. Turns out that our ability to pay attention and think about feelings is a whole other game from just letting ourselves have them.

Where does cognition interact with emotion? How do both influence our behaviors? Why aren't we equipped to deal with any of this emotional processing or - hell - acknowledgement? The answers lie in our socialization.

Looking for transcripts to keep up with these dense episodes? Check out t-mfrs.com for blog post versions, contact forms, the Discord community application, and more! Wanna keep this project possible? Head over to patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers to help me stay afloat.

🧠✊

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** Evolutionary Basis of Emotions

Tue, 06 Oct 2020 19:50:21 GMT

Hey, quick question... What are emotions? Not "where do they come from in the brain." We're all tired of the limbic system at this point. I mean, what are they and why do we have them?

Today, I'm talking about the evolutionary derivation of emotions. Why you feel the way you feel. How emotions are meant to motivate us for survival. And what the fuck happens when our personal histories override the experiences of our monkey-ancestors. Cuz, uh, I never stopped and thought about it until Skinner made me.

Into the message? Help this thing keep moving at www.patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers. Looking for safe social security for survival? Check out t-mfrs.com/join to apply for the online Discord community (heads up, it's closing soon).

🧠✊

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*** Self-sabotage and Dissociation

Mon, 05 Oct 2020 21:50:35 GMT

Shoutout to Tina. Posting this as an early release on Patreon, in case it helps.

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** Narcissistic Cycle of Abuse

Wed, 23 Sep 2020 08:32:37 GMT

In the last episode we talked about what defines a narcissist. Today, we're exploring the addictive highs and lows of the narcissistic cycle of abuse and why C-PTSD sufferers are so easily drawn into the trap. Abusive histories, codependent tendencies, and intermittent reinforcement, abound.

🧠✊

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Narcissists, Defined.

Tue, 22 Sep 2020 19:35:58 GMT

Who's bad at relationships? Yeeeah, me too. In particular, I hear a lot of us wonder about one personality disorder that underlies all the relationship drama… What’s up with the narcissists that seem to seek and destroy us, anyways?

What exactly IS a narcissist? And hey, how about some fun insights from my past reckoning. Next time, we'll talk about the Narcissistic Abuse Cycle and how that plays so nicely with CPTSD.

🧠✊

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** Over-stimulation, Hypersensitivity, and Trauma

Sat, 19 Sep 2020 19:25:06 GMT

Ever feel like you're just TOO observative and sensitive? Like your surroundings have an irrationally large effect on your concentration, mood, and emotions? Like you're strangely stimulated from the inside more often than not? Good news, it's not just you - it's Trauma.

Dig the Complex Trauma support project? Well, shit, this MF needs support too. If this trauma podcast is helping you in any way, please consider throwing a few bucks at it - you'll help other Traumatized Fuckers get the words they need to feel less alone, and help me afford to eat.

🧠✊

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** Highly Sensitive People; the personality trait

Sat, 19 Sep 2020 19:24:32 GMT

Today, we're talking about a new personality trait that I learned from the TMFR Discord community! Are you continually overloaded? Overwhelmed? Overstimulated? You might be an HSP - a High Sensitive Person. Find out if you're part of the 15-20% of the population affected by HSP and how this genetic predisposition to stimuli-flooding contributes to our Distress Intolerance and Emotional Responses.

🧠✊

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** Depression, Evolution, and Survival

Thu, 17 Sep 2020 20:10:51 GMT

Where to begin this conversation? Depression is as inseparable from my life experience as breathing. So, today, I'm looking at the crossover between Complex Trauma and Depression. What are the hallmarks of C-PTSD that lend themselves to clinical depressive spells - and vice versa? How do the two progress and pervade each other? And... is there a way to escape?

🧠✊

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Comfort in Chaos

Mon, 14 Sep 2020 19:10:18 GMT

Ever heard that generality, "Complex Trauma survivors culture chaos in their lives because it feels normal"? Fuck that, amiright? No way this constant shitshow is my fault. I do NOT want any of this entropy that follows me.

Well, Fuckers, today I'm taking a look at the more subtle forms of chaos that have been ruling my life and relations for the past 3 months. Maaaaybe it's time to acknowledge that chaos does something to calm this brain.... even if I don't want it to be true.

🧠✊

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** Three Axes of PTSD Management

Thu, 10 Sep 2020 19:20:13 GMT

I'm not a scientist anymore, but some things haven't faded. Today, I'm laying out my hypothesis that there are three major areas of life that need to be positively changed and maintained for lasting Trauma brain recovery to happen. The massive, overarching elements that require exhaustive attention and brave behavior changes. What are those areas? How do they impact our mental health? What happens when one or two of the components are in place - good enough, right? (Nah.)

🧠✊

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Distress Intolerance and Perseverant Thinking

Sun, 06 Sep 2020 19:02:56 GMT

Ever feel overwhelmed and shut-down for... well... kind of mundane reasons? Like you're about to explode if your phone doesn't stop pinging? You might kill your significant other if they don't let *that issue* go? You might break down if you get an email at 9pm?

When the agitation from over stimulation builds up, what happens next? Shutdown, avoidance, aggression? A quick turn towards maladaptive behaviors that lingers for days? Yeah, Fucker, today I'm talking about Distress Intolerance, inner critics, and avoidant coping responses. Is it real, and what can we do about it?

OH, and a replay from the podcast, Anxious and Angry.... you know, just one of my favorite bands, talking about Traumatized Motherfuckers! WHAT THE MOTHERFUCK. So excited that I'm pushing this episode to the front of the line!

🧠✊

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Prolonged Freeze States

Sun, 30 Aug 2020 19:11:22 GMT

Ever feel like you get "stuck" in a void? Like your brain goes blank and your tongue gets tied? Do you watch your life deteriorate while you're stuck in a parallel dimension?

Hey, today I'm discussing Freeze States in Trauma survivors. I've got a research article for you, revealing the occurrence of "prolonged" Freeze States in rats under Complex Trauma Conditions. Plus, we're talking about the ways that this survival mechanism can become a long-term maladaptive response instead of a momentary defense.

🧠✊

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* Emotional Dissociation (AKA Numbing)

Sat, 29 Aug 2020 19:19:43 GMT

How are your emotions? Black and white, like everything else? 0 or 100? Big surprise, your trauma brain is just trying to keep you safe.

Today, I'm discussing some research on Emotional Dissociation as well as my own experience with the learned defense mechanism. The emotional "switch" that flips when things are overwhelming... and how it takes on a life of its own.

🧠✊

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** Handicapped? ACEs and Work-Life Destruction

Wed, 26 Aug 2020 23:00:58 GMT

Struggle with work environments triggering your trauma and disrupting your life? Wonder why coworkers drive you over the edge? Ever feel like you're just "not cut out" for a 9-5? Yeah, Fucker. You aren't alone.

Of course, our ACEs contribute to difficult work relationships and poor life balance. When organizations encourage security hierarchies, poor boundaries, and social aggression... is it really any wonder that Traumatized Motherfuckers feel their mental health going by the wayside?

🧠✊

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** Relational Deactivation; hot & cold relationships explained

Thu, 20 Aug 2020 17:58:05 GMT

Ever heard of Deactivation? I hadn't either. But it explains a lot about my do-or-die relationships and flighty nature.

A die-hard companion. A martyr for relationships. A friend until the end. (READ: A codependent mess) UNTIL I'M NOT. Here for you one day, freaked out and disappeared the next. Is this a shitty personality, or survival instincts gone wrong?

Time to research something new - Deactivation.

🧠✊

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*** Shame and C-PTSD

Mon, 17 Aug 2020 18:57:22 GMT

If you google Complex Trauma you'll find many mentions of Shame. I get it, I think, but also... What the fuck IS shame, exactly? How is it different from guilt? How does it interplay with Trauma?

Doing some "real research" and reporting back on the hidden experience of Shame. One of the most painful and pervasive emotions.

Wanna give me a new topic to look at? Report it at t-mfrs.com and I'll see what I can find on PubMed.

🧠✊

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Trauma and physical manifestions

Wed, 12 Aug 2020 18:02:33 GMT

So... things suddenly aren't going so well with your body? Weird shit is happening, acutely and chronically?

Sorry, Motherfucker. Welcome to the world of trauma manifestation in physical symptoms. Talking flashbacks, dissociation, and all the assorted ailments you can expect. Plus, my general advice based on what helped me quiet down these autoimmune diseases, digestive failures, acid reflux, FUPAs, migraines, and more. Take it or leave it.

What did I miss? I'm sure there's a lot more. Let me know and tell me about your experience! Find me at t-mfrs.com

🧠✊

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* Early Trauma Coping: Punk Rock Saved My Life

Sun, 09 Aug 2020 19:07:05 GMT

Punk Rock Saved My Life. Original assertion? Nope. #frankturner Punk is the trauma genre, drawing misfits and unwanted outsiders together to create their own community. And they don't have time for yer basic shit.

Fact is, if I hadn't become a punk, I probably would have followed in my family footsteps. Without this community, lord knows I wouldn't have escaped my circumstances; abuse, addiction, poverty, and rural-shittery.

Wanna check out the musics? Find the Spotify playlist! Search Traumatized Motherfuckers and follow the skulls. Wanna tell me I'm missing something? Get in touch at t-mfrs.com

🧠✊

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Victim or Motherfucker? Has Trauma ever "helped?"

Tue, 04 Aug 2020 18:59:50 GMT

Unpopular opinion; early trauma gave me a lot of positive personality traits... you know, along with all the terrible ones.

Am I a basketcase sometimes? Sure. Am I also resilient, responsible, good at reading people, and ready for disaster? Yer motherfucking right.

How do you feel? Is trauma a help or strictly a hindrance in your life? Get in touch, MF. Find us at traumatizedmotherfuckers.com or t-mfrs.com. Holler and raise hell.

🧠✊

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Caring for everyone... but you.

Sun, 02 Aug 2020 17:55:23 GMT

I'm great at taking care of everyone... but myself. Always dissociated. Always slave-driving. Always worried about everyone else. Sound right?

What is this "self-care?" How does one "have fun?" Lessons from a life constructed of workaholism and martyring tendencies.

If you agree... Motherfucker, take a break and join the TMFR community. Find us at t-mfrs.com and support yourself for once.

🧠✊

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Walkntalk | “All your fault,” shinner critic screams.

Sat, 01 Aug 2020 17:38:19 GMT

Shit inner critic, that is. Mine‘s been rearing his ugly fucking face in regards to personal relationships... Logical brain quietly disagrees.

🧠✊

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"Living in Trauma" - Like remembering a fever nightmare

Thu, 30 Jul 2020 17:37:36 GMT

Looking back on those days of trauma-responses and utter misery... sometimes feels more like trying to remember a fever nightmare, rather than recalling the past.

🧠✊

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Complex obstacle; Starting therapy

Wed, 29 Jul 2020 17:43:44 GMT

What's harder than living in hell everyday? Finding someone who can help you get out.

🧠✊

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** What IS Complex Trauma? Off the cuff

Tue, 28 Jul 2020 23:12:48 GMT

Spoilers: this episode is re-done in 2021! Check out the newer scripted version, which kicked off the new (shitty) year.

When we discuss this C-PTSD thing... what the fuck are we really talking about? What is it? How does it happen? What are the long lasting effects?

🧠✊

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** Relatable | Was it really "Trauma?"

Mon, 27 Jul 2020 17:45:42 GMT

"Or am I just sensitive?" It's hard to know, when our culture has reduced "PTSD" to mean "Soldiers' disease." Oh, and your history-denying family? Yeah, they're not helping either. What is "Trauma," and how do you cope with the diagnosis?

Feeling the Trauma-shaming shakeup? Hey, us too. Jump into the community or get in touch at www.t-mfrs.com

🧠✊

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** Emotional roller coasters; The rise is relative to the fall

Fri, 24 Jul 2020 17:47:38 GMT

Anyone else have big emotions that shift faster than the wind? One moment I'm floating, the next I'm fucking sinking. External circumstances don't even have to wreck this ship; I have an explosive boiler room powering this ocean liner. With spiraling thoughts, fear-based perception, and a general ignorance of what "doing well" even means... it's hard to keep positive emotions stable or properly name your mental state. Everything is relative, and compared to others, I'm relatively-great at being miserable.

🧠✊

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Learn to enjoy saying goodbye to people you love

Wed, 08 Jul 2020 10:00:00 GMT

July 8th, 2020

Learn to say goodbye to people you love. "Yeah fucking right?" Fair. But there are times when I can believe it.

Relationships have always been the most important part of my life; for worse or for... still worse. You know, I've lost a lot of folks in the past year. Don't worry, they're still above ground - but we don't take walks together anymore.

At any other time, these relationship losses would be the final straw for this hunchback. But(t) luckily, I've learned how to enjoy saying goodbye to people. Even ones that I love deeply. Even ones that fucked me right over.

You feel? Come say hey or join the Traumatized Motherfucker community at traumatizedmotherfuckers.com (www.t-mfrs.com).

🧠✊

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* Blog | Endless Trauma Loops; Why do they happen and how to forgive mistakes on repeat

Wed, 24 Jun 2020 18:02:21 GMT

For the past 2 years, I've had major epiphany moments about my trauma journey and recovery .I've made enormous progress in changing my mindset and behaviors to change my life - working towards building one I actually want, instead of one shaped by trauma.

And then... I found an old journal that effectively demonstrates that I've known this information all along. Since, you know, a decade ago. I've had all the answers, I've known the right steps to take, and I've relived the same trauma patterns over and over again. What the fuck, self? What have you been doing? Loving this life of misery so much you couldn't give it up?

Today, I'm talking endless trauma loops. Where do they come from? What's up with this trauma programming, inner critic, and fucked up core belief system? How does history repeat itself without being noticed? And how can we break these patterns before another decade flies by?

Plus... how to forgive ourselves for mistakes on repeat. Thanks, Universe.

If you've got something to say or just want to connect with other Traumatized Motherfuckers, jump into the TMFR Private Patreon Discord! Or search the Socials @traumatized.motherfuckers!

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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Blog | Turn universal human fears into comforts

Wed, 10 Jun 2020 16:00:18 GMT

What happens when you've lost it all? You've got nothing left to lose, motherfucker. After your worst possible worries come true, it gives you a new perspective on what's coming next. Or, at least it did in this MF's case.

This is a journal-turned-blog post-turned-podcast that you might not be ready for. Talking about universal human fears in no-nonsense terms. The worst case scenarios. The most terrifying ideas that creep up on us at night.... And how they're all completely true. 😬

People don't care about you. You will lose everyone and everything you love. You will die one day. You are wasting your life.

Most of us pretend these are distant fallacies, reserved for "other people" and their karmically-unfortunate loved ones... but, MF, the sooner you can accept inevitable fate, the sooner you can decide how you actually want to live your life. Stop running from the undoubtable, lean into the comfort of uncomfortable certainty, get clear, and finally take action.

Not personally pissed off by this tough-love talk about inevitable loss? Huh. You might be a Motherfucker. Come hang out at www.t-mfrs.com. Become a part of the Discord community, share your story, and subscribe to more blog posts than anyone can handle - including member posts from kinder folks this nothing-left-to-lose TMFR.

And please, share this shit if you know anyone who needs a good scare into action. Search your Socials for Traumatized Motherfuckers; we're there.

🧠✊

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Blog | Trick your Trauma Brain into action

Mon, 01 Jun 2020 16:00:00 GMT

Episode was released, reverted to draft, and re-released at this time for early CPTSD booster.

Who's great at thinking about doing something, getting stressed out, and then guilting themselves for failing to start? For 10 years, it was this guy right here! And a lot of other Motherfuckers. That internal resistance. The thought that “nothing matters” or “you can’t do it right, anyways.” The voice that tells you it’s impossible. Or, the sense that you need to feel inspired to get started, and maybe that will all shift on its own tomorrow. It's convincing. But once you get over the initial climb to take the first step, have faith that everything will start to fall into place. You just need to quiet your inner critic and get going. And you might need to trick your brain into it. These are my two favorite bitesized hacks for keeping myself moving.

🧠✊

Check the full ep catalogue @ patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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* I am the Traumatized Motherfucker

Wed, 20 May 2020 17:58:06 GMT

May 2020.First Episode Ever

I’ve been too chicken shit to follow through with creating a podcast for the past year. The brutal voice in my head gave a million reasons not to. But Traumatized Motherfuckers don’t let fear determine their lives anymore. And I am the OG TMF. This is my Complex Trauma project, and I hope it can help - first, I just have to take the motherfucking steps. Join the community, find mindset support for your C-PTSD journey, and share your story at www.t-mfrs.com! Search the socials for Traumatized Motherfuckers and DM me with your perspective on trauma matters. Let's rap.

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Traumatized Motherfuckers

Bonus! The Lying Flat Lifestyle

Dating in Dystopia 01 | dope fiends; emo-masturbation & the end of dates

Something like Humanity (the reemergence of)

6.1 Time Turrors and Disturtions (A Month of Fear-Work)

Time Turrors & Disturtions

Dark Arts: Fear for Light

Escalations

Showin Face - The Personal Episode of 2025

Year End Reflection; Four Quarterly Trends

Five Tips for Resolving Rumination

Cog Dep Bonus! Depression Contagion and Helping Yourself Through the Holidays

Pub ep 5.11! Cognitive Basis of Depression Summary

5.10 Pub Ep! Back to High School: Secret Sources of Peer Pressure in the 2020s

Pub Pod 5.9 Costs of Impression Management

RSD pt 3: The Gen Z Stare & Global Disconnection

The Caveat! How to actually use the OKAY! trick

A One Word Shortcut to Acceptance

Acceptance and Commitment Training; The Environ-Mental Anxiety Solution

Traum-meta-tized Motherfuckers: Insanity in Environments of Reality Avoidance

Anxiety vs. Cog Control BONUS & WRAPUP! Final Informations and Implications

5.6 Pub Ep! Environ-Mental Illness: Fear vs. Anxiety, Stress, Phobia, Paranoia

FEAR vs. Anxiety, Stress, Phobia, Paranoia

Intro: Environ-Mental Illness (SLEW)

BONUS BONUS! The *Pitfalls* of Corrective Experiences and Expectations??

Preventing PTSD pt 5: Brief Summary of Behaviors

Non-attachment, acceptance, and perspectives for boundary setting

Nervous system indications of missing boundaries

"For Everyone!" Less Fiery Advice to Guide Yourself in Stresstimes

BONUS! Boundaries to allow compassionate, love, and self-existence

self-love pt 7 not 7: COMPASSION THROUGHOUT

How Perspectives GIT Fucked; Trauma - Ego - Parenting BONUS

STRESS 2 (a less tr-fucked planet)

The Default Mode Network | Self-limiting Beliefs Pt. II

BS-free "Self-limiting Beliefs" | Pt. I

WRAP on Filial Obligation

Video Audio: Relationships on a Loop

Caregiving Anxiety and Obligation in Relationships | Pt I. Origins

Getting Out of Trauma Brain | Surviving These Time

GUTS 2

GUTS

What SHOULD you be doing?

A Few Supplements on "Society Trauma"

EXERCISE | Lessons Learned from the Cage

Caged Family Trauma | Rat Wars Part II

Entrapped in Fear | Rat Wars Part I

When you can't get the basics of life | Trauma-Society

Supplement: When is it time to leave a situation?

Work vs. Recovery | Control your own time

Space for Recovering Yer Splintered Self | Let's get back to it, Welcome to Season 8

Recovery vs. Relationships

Empower Your Self | On the human rights war

Supplement: Resistance Vs. Resilience

Perspective Resilience Vs. Resistance | urnottaweakassbitch

Your Newly Diagnosed Perspective; Barriers, Supports, and Self-Stigma | Research

Your Undiagnosed Perspective | "When you don't know what's wrong" Research

CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVES

Top Brain Concepts | 2021 Reflection

Top 5 Social Learning Lessons | 2021 Reflection

Don't Let Those Fuckers Get You Down | 2021 Reflection

Fawning and Free-Will | 2021 Reflection

Closing 2021; Better Brains for 2022

Long-term Recovery; Your "Self" Circuit

Family Holiday Survival 2021

"Closure" of Background Brain Processes

Reprogramming "Attachment Styles"

Personal | DECATHECT; Anxious-turns-Avoidant Attachment

Just a Chat. Seasonal Triggers, Going No Contact and Reclaiming Your Brain (Life)

Bonus | Re-wiring Doomsdaying / Panic Programming

Spot Cyclical Abuse Patterns

The Brain Basis of Abusive Relationships on Repeat

Apply It | Repersonalization Pt II - A New Life for Your SELF

** Re-ssociate. Re-find Your "Self" and Reclaim Your Life.

Note: Trauma Cannot Make You "Lose" Yourself. (And other shit you need to accept ASAP)

Emotional Dissociation | Depersonalization

* Homelessness > Abuse | When Your Self Says "No More."

* Personal | No Contact 2021 And Always Hail Archie

Rerelease | Archie As a Metaphor

* Trauma-Personal | Archie Update

** Progress Halted: Your Trauma-Self

BONUS BONUS! The Pitfalls of Corrective Experiences and Expectations??